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Arden Sep 2019
guess what  
no matter what you say or do  
my ****** does not make me less
male  
my chest does not make me less
male  
my voice does not make me less
male  
i am what i am and you cant change that  
i am a friend  
I am a lover  
I am a brother  
I am not the subject of your study  
I am not the punching bag for your queerfear
i am strong  
i am everything  
i am still here
Arden Sep 2019
I look at my chest the way I'd look at a wound
I know its a part of me  
I know its there  
but it feels temporary  
and a little gross
like I sliced my thumb  
on glass at 1 am  
my binder is a bandage  
and it's hard to take off
because the wound will open up  
And my back hurts wearing from bandage  
But it's so much better than  
Seeing where my skin splits in two
Arden Sep 2019
last week my dad told me  
i am going to be homeless
when i grow up  

but from what i can see
i am not going to  
make it that far
Arden Sep 2019
There is a boy in my closet
The boy is friendly but stays hidden
When I look in the mirror there he is
I became jealous of who he is
He says he wants to come out  
I decided to ignore it
But the curiosity grew bit by bit
Until I could barely stand it
"CUT YOUR HAIR"
But when I went downstairs my unapproving mother stood there
The boy wasn’t at ease with what our plan began to be
Because in reality, the boy was really me
But all people can see is she
That part wasn’t cut out for me
I don’t understand the big deal if I'm a he
Arden Sep 2019
You call me
She, her, daughter, girl
Shhhhhh…
You speak with a blind mouth,
Look at me, see me
She isn't me
Only a fantasy that you clutch
I'm not broken, I'm free

Long hair
lipstick
lace dress
You question me every time I show you my truth
"Are you trying to hide your femininity?"
No, my femininity is simply not my definition
Spend a day in my skin, in my cage
And don't cry when the words start to pierce you like daggers.

Shhhh… stay silent, don’t worry its just a phase
Now do you see the "She" just doesn't make sense
You speak to me but your voice seems distant,
Bouncing off and echoing
Arden Sep 2019
Maybe I can’t stop
The downpour But
I will always join you  
For a walk in the rain

Together we will flow
Through an ocean of  
Ever-changing tides  
Drenched  
Tired  
Stronger  
Empowered  

The sunrise  
Will never look brighter  
Then the day we become  
One
Arden Sep 2019
i was getting better  
i was feeling again  

But
Now

its crashing down
in slow motion this time  
i desperately try to stop it  
but just keep getting attacked

by this thing  
this monster that i  
cant see  
how do i defend myself  
against something that  
i cannot see  

how do i be  
not broken  
im tired of being broken
my jagged edges keep cutting  
people i care about  

i was getting better  
but now  
im shattering
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