What day was that;
that day I met you?
Was it in my mind?
Why did those thoughts start then?
Thoughts.
Of confusion.
Of realization.
...Of self-hate.
Did you make me realize the truth?
That the world is nothing but cruel.
Or did I discover it?
That my childhood is gone.
My mind is that of an adult's.
The thing I don't want to become.

I fell.
But I am not your angel.
I am your demons.
Causing you to hurt.
Break.
They notice
My bruises

Her eyes are far away from you
Distant
Will you stay or will you linger?
She isn't there to watch you
Do you wish to stray?

Knowing I'm not alone,
My eyes shift side to side,
Searching for the demons within my mind....
Soon they'll sink into the depths of reality,
Infecting those who can see them,
...Only me.
I can see them. I'll always see them.
They won't leave me. They can't leave me. I am cursed.

Father went to Hell.
Pushed her out a window.
Down; Mother falls,
As I grin at her demise.

"Lies", I cry out.
Strings; ripped at seams.
Down; I have fallen.
A broken attempt at fleeing.

"4-5-1-20-8"
I carve; into a platform.
The sun sets; a vivid red.
But, frozen in time; the night never arrives.

"Shall I play this final song,
Until I break this strings?"
"Shall I be engulfed in flames,
Until these ashes form my wings?"

"Shall I drown myself in sin,
Until the gates won't let me in?"
"Shall I lie there; paralyzed,
Until I let my anguish win?"

A shattered soul, left abandoned.
Nightfall, without a star.
On the top floor, I let go...
...Pavement.

____________

child,
you have your hopes and dreams
but they will all be crushed

child,
you have your life and love
but your heart will be broken

you do not understand reality
your mind is in the clouds
and your soul is six feet under

my dreams are nothing more than mere parasites
as they leave me dismembered

your words work well as a pesticide
saying things i don't want to remember

as you capture me, and fracture me
i can see the stars
long ago they once were ours

those visions were more than just paradise
back in that dismal November
i should have taken their advice
before my heart burst into embers

as i agree, you decree
that this will end in scars
now wasn't that bizarre...

my mind now burns
i can no longer return
what did i earn?

i inhale this fractured lullaby
you have no alibi
just like the summertime
i should have said goodbye

and you now turn
you'll never return

i should have said goodbye

i couldn't say goodbye