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2.6k · Jul 2018
cozy april Jul 2018
buried by my thoughts
yours came to visit again
the warmth of your chest
the deepness of your breath
all came back to me
like a crashing wave so strong
I'm drowning below the surface

down here
I want to trace your hands
whisper in your ears
and put it all behind us
hear the gentle strokes of your mind
painting the love you bear for me
curl up into the depths of your soul
so you can always protect me

why is it when I say your name
it pierces my ears
and I feel pain through my whole body
why is it that despite rationality
this doesn't seem rational
and indecisiveness takes over me

I can't seem to articulate this feeling
but I haven't forgotten
and I never will
and with a heavy heart
a heavy mind
and soul
I'm so sorry baby,
but we must have unfinished business

hey you, I hope you read this poem
1.9k · May 2014
DPS (dead poet society)
cozy april May 2014
How does it feel
When life doesn't seem real
And you're floating about on your own
Your life seems uncertain
So you draw the curtain
Pretending there's nobody home
Don't theorize
Look in your eyes
They can't tell lies
Though you may disguise what you see
The mirror is free
Song birds are talking
And runners are walking
Be yourself
Be yourself
Be yourself
Be yourself
We need a tutor
So we built a computer
And programed ourselves not to see
The truth and the lying
The dead and the dying
A silent majority
Don't theorize
Look in your eyes
Are they telling lies
The ones that they learn on T.V.
What a way to be free
Be yourself
Be yourself
Then you can free yourself
Free yourself
See yourself
Then you can see yourself
Be yourself

1.5k · Nov 2013
Suicide shouldn't take us.
cozy april Nov 2013
I hope
That when we're older
Wiser, Bolder
We can understand
The things that use to break us
And realize
Suicide shouldn't take us.

1.3k · May 2014
cozy april May 2014
Children are nicer than adults
Animals are nicer than children
You say that thinking that way
I have to claim
That the closest to my heart is
Protozoan paramecium

So what

Paramecium is closer to my heart
Than you, you *******

To the peeps who act like they know me
1.2k · Jul 2014
Profound (Slam Poem)
cozy april Jul 2014
In secret
Words prepare dialogue transporting emotions like pilots
With no mercy words turn around and get messy
Placing Vaseline on dry throats speaking levy
Lips on skateboards sniffing the ground for reality’s ride
Electrifying plots against blurry words with
no physical basic thoughts thinking dialogue cravings
Untidy tiding plots buried in baritones hurried to hire imaginary thoughts
With no mercy things get messy

Stainless inks get messy

Poetry comes in speed bumps
Never the less poetry comes in speeds
Bumping speed bumps

Bump all slumps
Bluffing word bumps
Bump all stunts
Puff them hard till words provoke gumboot sounds        
Bump all ink pumps and thirsty thumbs                                                        
Speed bump conclusions jumping resolutions around
words spoken in gibberish gigabytes per seconds smelling leverage
Amplifying televised revolution on repetition far from average
Paralyze those walking eyes
Bumping rhythms
Dusty broken chests serving overcrowded greeting lines
On solo mode
Flirtalicious solo chaotic modes                                                            ­
Bumb connections around chairs warmed up by bums
Speaking the same womb and rhythms

Brothers and sisters chained up in pairs and bums
enslaved by messy word poetry speed-bumbs
Words get messy with no mercy on lip bumps

Those messy words camp behind bushy brains
Rail track through lips with no vibrating mercy veins                                              
Affiliate with true bones
Crossbones carrying history's forgotten side bums
Instrumental bones
Stinking hip hop bums speed flossing word stunts        
Words dig up chaos with no mercy                  

Armed with no rounds
Pounds stolen before two rounds
Sheriffs secretly scared of their own uniform sounds
Shortlisted words saving society's bums
Words are just messy and profound

written a few weeks back
1.2k · Mar 2014
Cough Syrup
cozy april Mar 2014
Cough Syrup
when you don't
have a cough
is ironic,
because in
you are sicker
than you thought.
997 · Mar 2014
cozy april Mar 2014
To spend my spare time
making tie dye shirts,
and watching flowers
blow in the wind
is actually fulfilling.

To drive in my van
and draw on the street corners
is actually fun for me.

To play my guitar on the street
for people to listen
and perhaps make their day
is a moment of clarification
that I love what I'm doing.

I like to go to concerts
and really listen to the lyrics.

I like to smell the plants in the breeze
and to plant trees to represent life.

It's really time to stop being sad.
Because this life is meant to do something.
And maybe it's just being a hippie.

937 · Jul 2013
Sailing to Self Avenue
cozy april Jul 2013
I find peace in storms,
The waves tell me otherwise,
Violent coils grazing me with the
last bit of sanity that's left,
But maybe I can survive without getting seasick,
While the sun comes out,
A clamorous sound wakes me from the dream,
Of hitting my place,
You can't touch me here,
You can't phase me here,
So I am not afraid of storms,
For, I am learning to sail my ship.

cozy april Oct 2013
Dear me,
Stop getting angry at things that aren't worth
the energy of staying angry.
Take a shower.
Take five showers.
Hell, take ten showers if you want to.
Stay in bed all day and do nothing!
Watch ****** romantic movies and cry your heart out.
Don't hold yourself in because you think you're "too strong".
Stay outside all day, and make shapes in clouds.
Wake up in the morning with determination
to fall in love with your city all over again.
Find cafes and independent book stores you've never been to before.
Pretend you're a tourist and take photographs.
Stay out all night.
Take better care of yourself April.
You deserve it.

Found this note I wrote to myself when i was depressed this summer. Wrote it in poem form.
778 · Jun 2015
Earth & Humanity
cozy april Jun 2015
In the beginning it was hell
you couldn't tell
that our existence wasn't yet stale
but actually pale by comparison
thought never to combat again.
bang goes the earth
never to be the same again
Changed again
astranged again to the new upright walking beings
as different as it seems
it's still the same
burried secrets that still remain
and we learn to sustain
never knowing that we are the bane
of our beatutiful earth
not aware of its worth
consuming its girth
as time runs out we start to dectect
our selfishness and neglect
for the very thing we were made to protect.

as the earth deals with its adversity
we decrease our carcinogenicity
start respecting our maternity
but time can only heal the relationship of earth and humanity

770 · Jul 2014
Different but Connected
cozy april Jul 2014
There is unanimity in the presence of
and life.

There is universality in
and shame.

A consistence of connection,
Proved by sympathy and empathy,
But humans still feel alone.

Our thought is based on what we've known,
Our desire based o how we've grown,
and life is just a thing we do, it's vague.
I know, but it's true.

Love is often unrequited,
Pain divergent in attack,
Shame is often isolating,
and a façade of loneliness is left.

But listen, speak, relate, and think,
Widen your perspective.

We can change the world someday,
Because we're different yet still connected

we can change the world someday
757 · Jul 2014
Note to the Past
cozy april Jul 2014
I have known the taste of salt water,
and the smell of decaying forests,
and the cracks in hundreds of sidewalks,
I have loved the gas petal,
and the airport concourse,
and the ever-changing time zones.
In all of these places,
I've found a home in not having one,
ready to admit,
you'll never catch up.

too lovely, my friends
756 · Jul 2018
cozy april Jul 2018
I walked along the soft beach
my mind alive with words for you
but you weren't there
I could only tell the smooth waves
glistening in light teal
the swelling love that storms within me
I hummed an old melody while
the starry sky tugged my chin
to look above me

I realize

Loneliness in nature
is nonexistent
the waves and the stars
grant me knowledge
and perspective
The voice of the night
serenades me
with warmth and care
my one true love
mother nature
reminds me that
her love is endless
I'm not alone
and with a gentle whisper
of the wind
she says
you are infinite

in times of hurt and contemplation, nature is always there for you
736 · Feb 2014
Solitude makes me Happy.
cozy april Feb 2014
Solitude makes me happy
Because solitude means there's no one there
to judge me, to hate me, to question me

Solitude means that despite being alone
I'm not lonely
Because I have myself
and I'm the only one
that can truly care about myself

but then again
I don't even care

So, solitude can be dangerous
Because when I give up
Caring about myself

Self destruction
Can be, oh so, tempting
Because when I no longer care

I just

724 · Feb 2014
Bitten Cheeks
cozy april Feb 2014
To be completely honest,
I'm not even surprised anymore.
Because I see it too often.  
I hear it so much.
I feel it all the time.
And when you show me
Your glitches
And cracks
And loose strings.
My breath no longer skips with
Lack of expectation.
But only becomes
It's become so common that
We no longer wonder
Who else's cheeks have been bitten so
That blood pours over our teeth.
And I wonder who's bitten deepest,
Along with the uneasy expectations
We hold with the future.

I've been biting my inside cheeks a lot a guess.
684 · Mar 2014
Best Friend
cozy april Mar 2014
She's so young
and with her pale
blue eyes she
blinks at a life
containing only
I love you Hannah. Get better.
659 · Nov 2013
Helen Keller
cozy april Nov 2013
If we were all
And blind
We would spend less time
Judging others
For what they've done.

657 · Dec 2013
Books in the Night Time
cozy april Dec 2013
From left to right
My eyes get tired
With witty sayings
And verb phrases
Nothing changes
My eyes are still tired

657 · Jan 2014
Lit Addicts
cozy april Jan 2014
Books are a great escape,
From the world's clutches,
and heartbreak.
And I walk,
Thinking of the words
within a novel I just read,
How they move me,
and remind me of the vary
places I had been in a short time ago.
The thoughts
distract me from
having to spend time with a broken family.
Still walking,
I look down at my shoes,
baffled by how worn out they are,
even though they were bought only 3 weeks before.
Maybe my shoes are like my heart,
They're so decrepit,
so tired of feeling the constant weight of
laughing in the morning,
and the weeping at night,
Their worn from a continuous nightmare
of pressure.
But that,
Is something
The books don't tell you.

Feeling this today.
645 · Aug 2014
Whale Song
cozy april Aug 2014
A weak bellowing echoing across the dunes
One last call for help
Heat shimmering across the sand
Sun slowly drying
A beautiful giant of the sea
Once so free, so strong and powerful
Now stranded - helpless

Footsteps on the sand
A sound of hope for a dying soul
Cool, lifegiving water splashed across parched skin
The slap of a flipper on the sand
A push, a shove
This kind human providing a saving hand

Can you imagine
his feeling of setting a captive free?
Can you imagine
the joy there would be?

To hear that haunting song
To see the wave of a flipper in the distance
One last final thanks
To kindness across humanity.

639 · Jul 2014
A Full Cup
cozy april Jul 2014
The thirst is real,
it’s a desert out in the real world.
Most want more,
though identifying selfishness,
does not affect this society.
Almost everyone wants a full cup
and it will most likely get filled to the rim,

Then spill.

638 · Nov 2013
Simplicity is Fading
cozy april Nov 2013
It's dark
So dark
Mad and angry
A solitary cruel
Civilization where nobody
Cares nobody pays
Intrest for the lives
Of the hopeless
Or the needed.
The simple
Drive for the complex
Ideas of perfection
In which we crave
Is so prominent
Like an eched image
In our simply geared minds
Those gears only turn
One way
Not bothering to look
Back at the others
Who are perfect
For living
Without that

cozy april Aug 2013
I only see the dim of
Black and white,
In my old home,
We never saw anything worth seeing
Just hate,
And lonliness.
Never had i seen one color,
I never knew the
Wonderful site,
Of even our ethnic rainbows,
How different we all are,
And I'm not alone,
Now In my new home,
I'm in a place with purple walls,
And rainbow curtains.
No fear,
Or loathing,
Just my happiness in beautiful
Colors I had never seen in my gloomy past.

624 · Jan 2014
2 am poets
cozy april Jan 2014
2 am is for the poets who
can't sleep because their
minds are alive with words
for someone who's not there.

for the alcoholics drinking
themselves into amnesia to
forget someone who left them.

2 am is not for the lovers
asleep in each others arms.

It is for the lonely, the ones
who are in love with the loved
but are not loved in return.

2:36 am
Can't sleep.
604 · Feb 2014
cozy april Feb 2014
I dreamed of you

kissing me.

I woke up,

Unkissed and


598 · Jun 2015
cozy april Jun 2015
I visited that crazy tower
of beautiful architecture
and magnificent history
and never had I ever known
how places that beautiful
can make you feel like your problems
are such a minority in this world,
I know terrible sorrow has come across us all  
and there's no such thing as never being sad
or judgmental,
but despite that
wonderful places like here
show me how life is so grand
thank you London

579 · Nov 2015
What they say
cozy april Nov 2015
When I was six,
I loved a boy,
He proposed with a
Dora the explorer
gumball ring, and
It was the best day of my life,
until it wasn't.

When I was thirteen,
I loved another boy,
I kissed him,
and felt loved,
and it was the best day of my life,
until it wasn't.

When I was fifteen,
I fell in love with a boy,
and even now,
after so much time,
every day is the best day of my life,
and it always will be.

It's true what they say about young love,
Your mind is new,
and you don't know how you'll change,
but there are the youngins that love you,
despite all that.
believe me, I know.
Because I will always love a boy with
ocean eyes and a silly smile,
and you can just discard
what they say

for the love of my life
563 · Jul 2018
cozy april Jul 2018
how come
I never knew I was this beautiful
and I tired myself out for years
telling myself I wasn't

how come
throughout the years
my self worth was only found through perception
and the real truth is
that self worth is found in my insight

how come
I feel so insecure
and cry deep within the night
despite the constant support

I know why
it was the constant endurance
of a young love so true
but heavy with expectation
so heavy
you must let go
my only question is

what the ****
why would you do that to me

this wont make sense to you
556 · Mar 2014
cozy april Mar 2014
It's quite sad
how people make promises
about the future
because they have no idea
what happens in the future

People say things like
I will always love you
I will always be here for you
And things will get better

I promise

It's 6 months later
and you don't love me
You aren't here for me
and things haven't gotten any better
this isn't toward anyone in specific
531 · Feb 2014
Shell of Me
cozy april Feb 2014
I tried to forget
but you grew roots
Around my ribcage
and sprouted flowers
just below my collarbones.
All day I pick at their petals
but I have not yet ascertained
If you love me.
or not.

530 · May 2014
Beautifully Heartbreaking
cozy april May 2014
After all was lost
I thought of you again
your voice played
somber melodies
and triggered memories
of falling into your arms
I woke up cold and idle
cause I've lost your aesthetic
somber lullabies
and it was beautifully heartbreaking

522 · Mar 2014
cozy april Mar 2014
Isn't it scary how fast
that song is over,
or how quickly
the school year goes
Doesn't it scare you
how when senior year
is over
all your friends will be
at their dream college
and i'll be at mine
but i'm sorry if i
want to stay
with my best friends
till the end of time
but that's just not how
the world works

520 · Oct 2013
To Fix my Soul..
cozy april Oct 2013
I'm trying so hard,
To fix my soul,
End my tears,
Both young and old,
Times get hard,
Nights get long,
And i have to restart,
Looking for my soul,
At only 16 years old.

503 · Oct 2013
My mind is consumed in you.
cozy april Oct 2013
I haven't been able
To think clearly
Fir the past days
I've come to the understanding
That you've indulged yourself
In my membranes
Covering yourself in my mind
Like a dark blanket
I am possessed by your beauty
Baffled by your ignorance
And completely
Fantasized by your willingness
To love me

For Adam.~
463 · Jan 2014
cozy april Jan 2014
If you
Don't do what you love
Life will be

442 · Nov 2013
Hey you
cozy april Nov 2013
Hey you,
I love you.
And your
In Pink floyd.*

439 · Jul 2018
cozy april Jul 2018
I woke up to orange skies
took a **** to clean my demise
drank a tea to open my third eye
pipe up
head down
eyes are pink
mind is black
I turn my back
trust you're not a shmuck
let the world soak you up

even when my mouth is dry
life's a breeze when you're high

will probably edit more later
426 · Jan 2014
cozy april Jan 2014
he whispered.
I breathe.

424 · Aug 2018
cozy april Aug 2018
I stayed at home
dived into books
into myself
I'm an introvert

I took the test
one then two
that told me lies
or so I knew

I met the kids
5 months after
showed me care
and love so true

an extrovert
it's who I am
unknown to me
it was a scam

loneliness can steal
your heart
take a drink
it's all a sham

Don't let the names
of psyche
take away from
who you are

424 · Feb 2014
The Memory Clamor
cozy april Feb 2014
There's those songs
That you put on repeat
That make you cry
Yet you still listen to them.
Because of the memories
They always bring back to you.

There are those people
That make you cry
And hurt you to the extreme
Yet you still want them
In your life
Because of the memories you shared
That always come back to you
And they are hard to let go of.

419 · May 2014
Ocean Love
cozy april May 2014
The world seems
painted in a
mask of blue

A deafening
thick of
swelling silence

My wandering
heart drowned by
thoughts of you

A timeless love
to sooth the
sea's violence

416 · Oct 2014
September 12th, 2014
cozy april Oct 2014
And the way your ocean eyes lit up,
made a storm rage in the depths of my soul.
The sweet silhouette of the waves
that danced within you.

It was everything to my beating heart,
and suddenly my brokenness felt whole.

For Clay
Love  you very much
414 · Oct 2013
Art of Sadness
cozy april Oct 2013
Nobody is born
With demons already living
It takes time
For them to fester
Inside your mind
Until they get into
Your imagination
Where they master
The art of sadness
To perfection

401 · Feb 2014
This is hard
cozy april Feb 2014
Trust me,
This is hard for me,

395 · Jan 2014
cozy april Jan 2014
And boy,

cozy april Feb 2014
I am not depressed.
I can still smile at pretty things
And laugh when jokes are funny
I can still talk to people.
And enjoy nice days.

But when I go inside,
When I'm alone,
There's something broken.
And I fall into sadness so sweet
That it engulfs me.
And the tears always fall
When I'm falling asleep.
And I miss something
That doesn't exist.

I am not depressed.
I've just been sad for a while.
But I can still find the peace.
And smile.*

387 · Aug 2014
A Life Away
cozy april Aug 2014
I sleep in the clouds, dream in the sky,
I'll keep dreaming as life passes me by,
I think my dreams keep me sane,
I dream of happiness, a life without pain,
some people say I'm stuck in this place,
and I'll never go anywhere,
but in my dreams I've already been there,
I know some day I'll have to wake up,
but I feel the real world is more like a nightmare,
I'm safe in my closed eye wonderland,
this poem goes to all the dreamers that understand,
no matter what they say...
keep your dreams but don't dream your life away.

386 · Jul 2014
cozy april Jul 2014
Inevitable in life,
the new life draws in me: a small
sun with roots that I will have to water deeply
and push to fights their own battle
against the weeds.*

361 · Nov 2013
This Strange Idea.
cozy april Nov 2013
I never understood
The idea of love
How you could be so invested in each other
So persistent to one another

Then I met you.

360 · Jan 2014
open books
cozy april Jan 2014
I gave you a book
filled with lies
and called it an

The binding fell
apart when I
opened my mouth
and forgot

what had
been written.

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