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Anton Kooistra Feb 2016
a
a
A
a
A

agony

and
and
and
and

are

arms
arms.

at
at

baby

beaten

beating
beating

birth,

body

border
border.

breast
breast,

consciousness.

death?

deep
deep

despondency,

distance

early

East

eternity.

feel

for

From
from
from

go

going

happiness

has
has

Have

He
he

hear
heard

heart
heart

him
him

I
I
I
I
I

if

in
In
in
in
in

infinity

is
Is
is

It
it
it
It

laid

little

love,

man,

mine,
mine.

morning.

my
my
my

ocean

of
Of
of
of
of
of
of
of
of

on

pain

passed

passes

rocked
Rocked

rumbling

sky?

sleep

small
small
small

some

sorrow?

springing
Springing

stop.
stop.

stopped.

Such

that

the
the
the
the
the
the
the
the
the
the

Then
Then
then.

time.

to

too.
too.

train

up

very
very

wake

was

waters

waves,

we

well

What

When

white

will
will
will

with

wonder

you
Alphabetical sorting of the words from the poem "From the Deep Waters of Sleep" by Johanna Adriana Ader-Appels. (Recording: https://soundcloud.com/anton-kooistra/alphabetical-sorting-01)
Anton Kooistra Feb 2016
And all of the coloured flags

She escapes 
On my bare skin
But all you ever cared about
*******
Making me smile, and trying to
Please me there once again?
Walking in archways 
Upon your skin
Hungry for some freshly meat
And you were quick to put the blame.
That night at your house
"Tame my beast
Was the curl of my toes.
Would be like a rerun of
You knew the closer I got
Saliva drops in deep,
Be messy.
And women is from women..
Upon your neck
But she's in every crease upon my bed 
I ask him about his hurry...
Because I failed you 
While we meshed bundled
Spent what felt like days watching names roll on screen 
It feel like home..
stomachs filled with butterflies
Eat that p*ssy,
Knowing that continuing things
******* on my tongue.
You let me lay next to you,
not so graceful

Your warmth came at a time
It have two doors..
an insane choreography.

She leaves as if she couldn't stand to watch the credits role
Never looking back 
What felt like worlds between us
with your very first kiss."
You.


For why tear drops fleeted 
kiss the sweat,
Gave you more power.
To leave a mark
But I wasn't that naive...
To make you see us through.

Untitled
Then he touch mine and push..
What lies 
******

No teeth mark not tear 
Asking me questions on questions

she can't feel
herself ***.
But all you ever wanted
Deep in the woods - I shall hide
Stray and lone,
He was in busy in a tight look..
Spit game,
Caress the wrinkle, the roll of fat,
how you make love to a woman.
Follow my trail of blood
I've always deemed
Clearly I was into you
Was for me to get down on my knees.
Out in to the night 
Couldn’t leave it up to chance
I confused...
But clearly wasn't enough
forbidden
It is not like the movies,
They said I lost my muse 
Inscription
tickle the unwanted hair.
But that ended so quickly
make it numb,
Clearly I wanted something new

I thought about throwing it to the streets 
At first you were all about
and blissed.
Come! Release your cemen
My Muse
My eyes lingered over what used to be. 
As your face stays determined not to crack 
not really,
Sleep? 
The more that I would fall.
I wasn't nervous on my end
But to make a bruise
I told you about my insecurities
soft in the touch
It is love we are making,
It was very tight...
Responding to every messages
I remember your line up crisp,
Our minds were fuzzy
Charismatic.
Within the same hour,
He says..

Under the moons light
You made it seem like you cared
In which I needed it most
Looking like nothing but a ten.
Some sell what is between the door..
But I know her 
less grinding,
The flawless body is a myth.
Love #61
To believe we'd ever get anywhere
Down my cheek
In the shadows of the forest
He says...
Men is from that...
Head locked like a brace 
Cold Touch
Leaving quickly out the door
We like to play tag on the full moon
Even after you left
I couldn't help but call your name

and very private.
More finger, more tongue,
As I sat among the nightmare

She ran 
Juice, come from the door...
the sensations are invisible, internal
You moan and howl in heat
Ignoring then sudden realisation 
And how you had a habit of making me weak
It is not a mystery..
not pictures.
In the nickname only I used 
Excusing death in a movie 
Is my passionate
The space between us small,
when I touch your naked skin
Not able to wash the memory with a splash of soap and water 
For no moisture was lost 

Be slow and gentle

Kush on my breath,
Let the homeless make fortune over our mistakes
Cradled up in the nook you used to sleep 
Your sentences elaborate and
High above my tower I see you 
I feel happy-pain..
The wolf and the witch
You say:

I saw him..
No, not me.
until don’t.
We are covered in delight
While hidden hands forced my face to your seat.
I'll treat you with a bone
It is not like the movies
In the cycle of life
lips touching, and hearts set on fire
The mechanism may look awkward
Freshman year me.
My body burns on fire
Randomized from poems found under the tag "***".  https://soundcloud.com/anton-kooistra/and-all-of-the-coloured-flags
#***
Anton Kooistra Mar 2016
*******
keyboard
hamburger
blue
coffeehouse
smile

the
joy
citizenship
face
she's

Slapped
brightly

a
cold
lot
on
sweat
singing
Dance
merry
stuff
a
canned
about

mayor
of
Cool
macdonald
croudsource

major
was

work
loud
birthday
red
call
measure
workingclass
monogamy
silence
a
his
carnivores

down
street
manly

ordnance
every

happy
steaming
beginning
rattle
place
ukraine
sniff
serial
place
We
testing
laugh
bro
my
worker
of
crap
juice
water
canon
man
shuffling

the
bread
Shaking
fried
peanut
Johnny's
cleaninglady
based
upbringing
hums
flanberg
flames

the
brainface
got
of
before

awkward
flight
foresaw
on
black
She
travels
meaningful

fell
hamster
fighter
lack
correlate
was
day
colony

what
man
She
train
fortify

Guitar
piano

orange
intermezzo
butter
squints
cackling
happy
mate

hot

breadsource
browsers
Randomized from environmental conversation, songs and cold writing.
Anton Kooistra Mar 2016
good enough kramer talks
surrender thought volvo maniac
sniffing sound righteous ******
empty flask google doppio's

maternal cup dummy brand
fenix ghetto spy force
renovate ****** wall mart
resonance water croquet bug

material overture kiss A4-paper
rover many people bag
shut fine coffee power
justice cloth measly rent

communal broth pixel time
went minimum swag beautify
agenda question sweet march
improvement mayhem make swivel

waste croneys quiet myriad
composition tommy beat hometeam
cement mother merit fence
wanton founding four swing

jetfuel matchless assignment queen
stansford mediocre serious cat
innuendo phone insult ball
mental song quenching treat

indiginous mate patron verily
putrid how moat minimum
meaning penitentiary sliver anything
black flow rivet leech

****** magazine prada hand
colony policy randy coinage
sovereign christ kingdoms manly
mentions quit quill before
Cold writing and randomizing
Anton Kooistra Mar 2016
Henderson's had plaid failure citzens
Bust cow pie chart retina
Moldy bluejay penitentiary
May may may
Here is where milk
Mortgage on questionworks
Polio met
Sombrero Antics
Anton Kooistra Feb 2016
I often crave you.
What you do not know is what I actually really feel for you.
We are so good together, it excites me.
3. Doubt
my reply to "I love you", a censure
So that no one could swim,
You are here, and more than me!
I know you know
i don't know what this is
You Are Here
She had known of heartbreak,
Love Is
Shook his head and sighed,
9. Hopeless
And then gave her some time,
You are here, and more than I feel,
6. Confusion
What made me stay
But princess can’t you see?
I miss you rushing to be in me.
But I do know it would please me if it were to happen again.
It smells like the earth.
for you, for you
And what I feel about you.
Who was oh so strong,
And you're just fine
Untitled
After all this time, are we even possible?
regardless of how tough I usually portray
Than you ever see, more than I feel,
what you do not know, though, is what I go through carrying all these feelings and this head full of thick matter and questions and puns and metaphors can get me weary.
My dear you have spent so much time trying to figure out this chaotic, tangled mind of mine and
After all this time,
He chuckled underneath his breath,
He knocked on her door,
if I will ever be the only one with you,
She said, “Though I’m alone,
It sounds like fairy chimes ringing.
You are foetus, alright you are; you just an other soul,
most of the time
She mulled over what she should do,
The on one fine day,
I never want to feel as though I am too much,
And it makes you feel immortal.
Came a boy with brown eyes,
it still hurts
always so close.
I never want to feel as though I am not enough,
12. Lust?
5. Hope
You get into my skin in a way nobody else ever has,
It looks like the night sky.
Im waiting on you      
Ever love again,
to be and push you away...
And then a thought occurred,
Love is clear.
My heart is broken
8. Hurt
11. Un-assured
She built her walls so high,
I do not know the reason behind this feeling.
You and I both know,
I woke up in the morning,
But someone to always be there,
to ensure of these feelings are still kept well within me.
Infested moats with crocodiles,
I feel so much for you.
all over.
and when i see you, i see you
oh, you have come so close.
She knows that being strong,
And I don’t need a man.”
I don't want to go on thinking of you so much.
Break
i don't know what you are
it's still a gaping hole
Why?
And crossed the moat all dry,
1. Pity
Inside of me, the darker places turn into the brighter day,
When you are with me,
And I admire your pride,
Is this love?
Is this it? ... love?
Not Another Fairy Tale
He said, “Yes, you don’t need a man,
What made you leave
hoping that you knew how much I liked you.
And found truth in his words,
Don’t you wish to be free?”
With someone by your side?”
“Not someone to give you courage,
You belong to this moment,
She said, “I am strong,
The girl pondered for a while,
I woke up in the morning,
I woke up in the morning,
your touch alone ceases me to ensure all these feelings for you are not brimming out of my skin.
This is the story of a girl,
While you're moving on
wanting to kiss you.
This is the tale of how she,
Who; is breathing with my breath,
Alone I will proudly stand,”
Or chase away your fears,
I cannot help but doubt
10. Hurt
Wishing, hoping, wanting
He walked up to the wall,
Doesn’t mean being alone.
Sorrows flew away, when I imagine you and hear you,
I do not remember the first time we kissed,
when you're no longer mine to hold
But didn’t choose to climb,
because i see you
the one that is finally enough,
I can not resist you.
When did we break
2. Rage
...
The building made of stone,
especially at night
I no longer want to feel all these things I feel for you.
Was strong for far too long,
It taste like any and all flavors.
That you are locking yourself in,
What are we doing, again?
Does this girl think a man’s purpose,
And so, she swore to never,
7. Addiction
When did it change
Only you get me the way I want to be got.
It's in here,
She understood its pain,
4. Fear
Untitled
wishing that you wanted me.
you were with me during her...
The girl decided to escape,
and when i see you i die deep inside
not the last, to be honest.
He built his own bridge,
So no one could climb in,
Is to help a girl survive?
He said, “You’ve locked everyone out,
But wouldn’t life be nicer,
I feel so much for you.
the only one for you,
To share the joys and tears.”
Randomized from poems found under the tag "Pain".  https://soundcloud.com/anton-kooistra/i-often-crave-you-1
Anton Kooistra Apr 2016
King, a king!
Kings should bow before before kings!
This ******* king!
**** the king! We need a new king!
King! King! King!
King
Anton Kooistra Feb 2016
More anxieties and an awareness of past mistakes.
I don't know how I'd cope,
And what do I gain?
i figured you weren’t that interested
I'm buried in lies,
yours and mine
In thoughts that have my heart in a knot.
I've been lucky
1:11am
just hold myself tight,

but all things must come to an end
Lost in my own head
yet people seem to admire the fire in my eyes,
you never looked back
Being paralysed by grief as memories of all our stupid activities flood in.
Comfortably lying on my bed,
i still don’t know you although
Wishing that I saw it coming.
except this time i take the blame
one day you could
but i think im wrong

although you thought you did

My voice in my head is all I can hear...
I didn't even realize my poker face and empty heart.
i knew all along this would be my fate
And lost in my own head.
Won't Let Love Hold Me Down
my heart startled and died for a second
to this day i don’t know if your love was real
I've got me and me alone forever and always.
not even love since I deserve the frown,

i m p o s s i b i l i t y
I wish I had you here, but it turns out I’m writing another sad love poem
for fear that I might know,

I hope maybe then, I'd be man enough to adopt his values.
I'm thinking for **** sakes,

plagued
as I meet someone new,
what if
the next you're gone

what if
for letting myself get hurt

is about the love that I've so longingly hidden,
I hope I didn't play with your heart like a crime,
Losing a loved one...
be here with me

Today I realized nothing can hold me down,
Knowing that my father's gone,
I'm willing to admit an amount more than I've been given,
as good as your act
time went by
I honestly don't know how I'd cope,
Wishing I had made the dreams we shared become a reality earlier.
Being unable to breathe as I feel regret overwhelm me,
Oh, I've been lucky -

But I cannot,
I disappear like the fog that vanishes then appears,
year after year it’s all the same

where doors are locked and walls are dark

Maybe that's why God has been so kind to me.
and you were the one i wanted to share it all with
I don't know how I'd cope,
i’m sad but also liberated
wondering
My favourite songs blaring in my ear,
So I guess I'm still here,
I've been sitting here,
Just a question
at my worst I feel nothing not even love.
what love looks like -
and i no longer have you by my side
what used to be?
forever left
you are good with your words
I'd like to sleep,
but nothing can be glued
i'm plagued
Only expressing thoughts that are sour.
Untitled
When you're dead on the inside?
our feeling
I sincerely hope he'd die dignified, like he always was,

I mean, cycling past my friend's house without being able to stop the waterworks.
by these questions
coming from how you made me feel
deep inside a place -
do you wonder
do you remember us?
i may good with my words
not tonight,
that i don’t have to handle more chains
not good at act
but as the months go by we’ll both eventually change
now and never is a great time,
For what feels like an hour,
I would pretend I never met you,
To never experience the death of someone I call a brother or sister or my dad.
Because I'm too deep

it’s not like we knew each other anyways
you never knew me either
it's crazy

eventhough they are same
just like you and your pretend

where I don't even go
i heard that u are taken
So it's happening yet again,
Is there any point in trying to look alive,
those dry eyes won't leak any tears,

in learning of my life, my story
i never liked you
Remembering how he always cautioned me of this day -
Randomized from poems found under the tag "Thoughts".  (recording on soundcloud in progress)
#thoughts
Anton Kooistra Apr 2016
on the the water
somewhere this

then an
many different ideas
  
an unused phone
balcony, cracked lips, eggs

a party, someone left
copious, the birds
  
cold feet, an golden trees
hung over
  
the, the Pigeon
after the clean outside
    
matters, 7 bottles of wine
breeze twitter, plate
    
but then, a sketchbook
a red curtain, the brother
  
empty, difficult
police, for what it's worth
    
water, floor
sue, it is a
another cure
sister, a Malaysian
    
dry, another one
screen, front door
    
whispering sun
firehose cloud
Observe a hangover
Anton Kooistra Mar 2016
Paint me as I appear to the world
But his art was beautiful,

of good food literature,
You are a beautiful jewel
I opened my mouth and it felt like my soul was speaking in vowels.
And the years well get to share
Beautiful is a word that I rarely use...
****** metaphors are the height
in the deeper part of the forest,
Paint me soft

You fear that I might see them
Beautiful (10w)
"Beauty's in your eyes that see me as beautiful
Paint me in any manner you feel just

"You're beautiful"
The Artist
You are the most beautiful
Or it'll cover up your beautiful heart
more complex than pho,
Are just as beautiful as you
PERFECT
it flourished with vibrancy

his style lacked pencils, paints or ink
hotter than szechuan rabbit,
as bark on a roasted lamb,
but not the kind you think

Vowels/Angel
deeper than massaman curry,
but I wonder how it would work
You are your temper and your lips

eyes the color of fallen leaves
The scars you keep within
I wonder.
Eyes the Color of Fallen Leaves
You can go to sleep in peace
locked in his mind.
We always compare food to women.
He was different,
A jewel no one will EVER be
Paint me beautiful
Make the angels want to cry
sweeter than fresh cream...
Each time I opened my mouth, it felt like I was speaking in vowels.
You are that goodnight kiss
You are that tidy room...
Don't be afraid to remove
The brightest star upon the sky
The man was an artist,

Your brilliant rays of sunshine
Beautiful
for he kept it hidden

Your brilliant rays of sunshine
Beautiful
for he kept it hidden

But sometimes, I feel like you are a synonym for beautiful.
So when you sleep at night

It lacked a physical appearance,
Because I do not know how to define the adjective -
If I met a beautiful lass,
And what came only ever sounded a little like Y-O-U.
and I told her that she was lovely
Paint Me

in reverse...
But my Prince, I have scars too
You are your insecurities
Randomized from poems found under the tag "Beautiful".  (recording on soundcloud in progress)
Anton Kooistra Mar 2016
"Put a feather on it!" someone whispered.
"Roundabouts!"
The tank was full of fuel by now.
"Well, that's pretty strange!" he thought.
"If you think you can manage, it's fine with me!"
He appreciated her.
"Here's something for you!"
"Rushing sounds."
He ate an apple.
No flowers in the sun.
Woodlands as far as the eye could see, but what lay behind them was just out of view.
"Hoy!"
Magnificent, they were, but they barely would compare to a field of steel watchmen riding the mists of time.
"Cheeky!"
Here were monsters.
Cheeky.
Trust is oftend tried at the most inconvenient of times.
"Friday is a great day to go out, everyone does it!" seemed the only reasonable reply.
"Crisp fries on a platter!"
The people gathered in the streets.
She had a couple of drinks.
Monica likes Waltzes.
He appreciated the night sky for a moment.
A rough bundle of ropes lay scattered around on the floor of the empty appartment.
Rifles were loaded, hats were donned, it was a chaotic display of things.
Heavy traffic slithered trough the steamy morning.
Water rushed into the bathroom, a fish drowned.
Monica was made of different pieces of wood.
Tumbling bumblebees were far from here.
Water.
A gothic arch reaching high and wide.
Howitzers blazed loudly.
Effectively, he got kind of good at it.
Water rushed.
What he was waiting for, he couldn't say, but he was definitely waiting.
Jerry sells plaster.
Commercialising industries seemed like a good plan back then.
Jerry spoke to his female friend, who was unnamed for no specific reason.
Hounds.
Crisp fries on platter.
Radiant mushrooms spoiled the darkness.
Towering high above the the misty clouds, the collection of Eiffel towers spend their time bending to the wind.
I am a narrative voice.
"I am fishing here!"
"Howdy, clowns!"
Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to go all the way.
"Hey now, don't watch that, that's a terrible show!" she said.
Pianos were thrown.
"He shook his head." she said.
What they were looking at, no one could tell.
Very chaotic indeed.
Cold writing randomzied
Anton Kooistra Jun 2016
Once a band gathered and then they sang for my father
Everything sang for someone in the world
Someone sang a song of an old photograph Photograph

It's about how he said that he wants to be a child

But how can you turn back the flames of time
A faded image of a bride playing this uke
On a journey, in a car, closely related

Still maybe a girl will show you how to use the wire

Sentient bob is a man who often asks
What should we do when we carry the water
Everyone likes the birds  

maybe someone has a big fat plan

come on may I say all the good mother's play
Now we're on a sailing boat
Telling the truth

Sometimes that's all there's to do
Anton Kooistra Mar 2016
The librarian walks around.
I look to my right and see a classmate watching videos on youtube about boards of canada, if she looks to her right there's a girl looking at her cellphone, the video has bicycles.
The people in the main hall can be heard all the way on the other side of the library.
I took no pictures today even though I brought my analog photocameras, there is no visual recording of this day.
I look to my left and see a large flatbed scanner, it says EPSON in big capitals and in smaller capitals it says "GT-20000".
The artworks behind the window looking into the hallway look partly improvised and partly thought out.
The reflection of a grey sky can be seen when looking up.
I think it should rain but the clouds seem reluctant to do so.
I will try to write a song today.
The brown artwork is a tree with roots.
I think that is a bit much.
The clicking subsides.
The librarian remains silent, with a sporadic amount of mouse-clicks to break up the quiet atmosphere.
I don't know what the song should be about, in fact I would like it to be about nothing which is something not easily done.
The silvery-blue artwork is made of old plastic bottles.
I liked it, it was great though I am not a fan of the cgi blood used in some scenes.
I can forgive them for it.
I am anton, I am a man in my late twenties.
The large television in the library is turned off.
The noise in the background is noticable.
The door of the toilet is opened and a girl with heavy dark make up steps trough and makes her way back to her work.
The scarf is plaid, red.
I rode my bicycle to my university, the road was broken up and I had to be creative in my driving.
I remember that my classmate records the traces of people trough frottage, it's interesting.
The fingers of students on keyboards seem to tickle my eardrums, they are a bit intrusive.
I will stay in school for dinner.
The white artwork is skeletal and weblike at the same time.
The words are on the wall and on the glass window.
I visited my personal coach who helps me in school, we discussed my plans for the weeks.
The amount of sentences should equal 26.
The noise of typing shortly intensifies.
The words released onto youtube spell titles of songs. 14
I am wondering what to do next.
I am wearing Adidas shoes, they were considered cool when my ex's uncle gave them to me as a present; I felt reluctant to take them.
I visit a university where I study arts.
The head of the author is filled with chaotic thoughts.
I think my classmate has a funny way of typing, she seems to be talking to a friend on facebook and I am not creepy at all.
The internet seems slow.
I think about the amount of documents that must have been scanned on the machine, there are scratches on it.
The voices can be recognized.
I saw monkey heads.
The cables of the computer hang against my feet and are slightly irritating.
The girl next to me changed between videos.
I signed up for a few courses, my academy requires it's students to do so.
I eat and drink at breakfast, lunch and dinner.
The library is lukewarm.
I notice that my fingers already hurt from typing, or maybe from sending text messages from my phone.
The radiator makes a low rumbling noise.
I record stories and poems on casette tapes, they find their way into simple installations.
The garbage bin is empty.
I watched the first episode of Ash VS Evil this morning.
I am warm, I am wearing a leather jacket and a fleece vest over a brown t-shirt.
From observation and randomization
Anton Kooistra Nov 2016
The doing.
Encouraging of Alternative,
you guy, this springs

how enjoy:
comes to feelings.
Me, alongside I

pain He
such All a
much him. Use I

lazy back
can. Thought guy,
Game make aura. but

like creepy,
a Melodiously he
have Which a If

chance who
Trance, person being
is escape that 99.99999999

and you're
would I in
dreaming my maybe we

own, I'm
a Apprentice, understand
can I standing true

He's escapes
the don't unless
great is alone, Scientist

He

that I am good at anything I put my mind up to. My will is my biggest power.

When am
think awake me
each logic,need and

hurt is
I believes that
music.can window. I


laughter. dream
who and common
passive 0.000001 smile fights

dreamt he
protecting a had
sense I that he

know. sigh
Shakespeare, smile. of
me. you Arthur, especially

confused, is
on me.me,
feel my my and

of has
I it life
chance anything... he and

Regardless, when
me True or
dreams, I me my

usually not
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aren't the He silly

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to I
Rangers loves constantly
am lips. Always me,

calls of
me What guy.
The well would I'm

for always
and patiently one
don't he's Indie pop,

my he
but just me,
troubled, I a unique,


a scary,
here, woman sort
I'm Thrones. Me Divergent

danger, out
Poetic a world
other. World before submissive

he I
hell I to
who or proof. for

of him.
Guy, causes of
was question my why.

List a
I this your
he bravery sword. he

the think
You is and
truth a close fight

trust when
in specific smile
a just caring

it each
looking so I I
the a know infront

am front
is me. where
of beautiful, insane, lost

celtic of
of that when
addiction Tales music is

very time
is wide believe
He personally admitting love

believe enjoy:
put to series,
to or someone to

me, being
a 'beautiful', about
out haunting taught adventures

by and
sacrifice Music I
has they mind, disliking

it tell
eyes. Keep doesn't
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me. and my
past wait and guy...

is you
without but is
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Randomized from the poetic scientist's first and less poem as of this moment.
Anton Kooistra Feb 2016
Love the little worm
Just as unbecoming
Look in the mirror.
My words are ugly
My body is ugly
and selfish actions.
Why people
It was the people.
In a parallel universe.
a stray hair,
Ugly wars go on endlessly …
And from that, ugliness was born
Get perished anytime …
Ugly
Simply because they are greedy and
Love the little spider
But it’s often the people
***** looks,
...I told you I was
We really are living
They become even more jumbled than they were before.
A lot of graves are dug for those
My breaths are ugly
But when words go to leave my head
A crooked tooth,
Love the little pig
hateful words
an extra pound?
its thin silken web
I am ugly
My words on a page
small zit,
Mistakes
For you
It was only until now that
A lot of pretty innocent people 
My face is ugly
Are ugly ink blots,
It's my greatest fear
Beautifully Ugly
An ugly war goes on
Why cant I speak beautifully?
My actions are ugly
What's Ugly?
With all its self conscious nature
I wish I could say
Wars' traders don't care
My soul is ugly
Ugly
Offers such beauty
beautiful is ugly.
That make it ugly.
To find me ugly too
Who naturally spins
What's ugly?
When any ugly war breaks out , then
My thoughts are ugly
Will be lost as an ugly outcome …
When I was a kid I
were ugly is beautiful
This world we live in
Who is so happy
Coward at the same time …
Ugly
My mind is ugly
just to play in the mud
Makeup will only go so far to hide an ugly heart.
I understand.
Ugly VS Beautiful
About human lives
And terrible.
Just what I mean
They would call it boring,
It wasn’t the place,
Peace is The pretty alternative to any ugly war …
I am ugly
And ugly
 We live in a world
Would beg to leave this place.
Didn’t understand
Love Ugly
Once, someone was called beautiful
No, I will tell you what's ugly.
As the scars on my wrist.
and
Randomized from poems found under the tag "Ugly". https://soundcloud.com/anton-kooistra/love-the-little-worm
Anton Kooistra Feb 2016
where all the civilised remain.

And the bird, he silenced.
I found my missing passion in you kiss
Cuz with all the pain I'm stretched to thin
With no drugs to dull the pain
I sit here and contemplate why
Teasing and taunting like a missing limb
Hurts Too Much!
only to find
You know what that implies
hiding inside the darkness
Reap the seed thats planted
Thin red lines they etch the skin
Wishing I too would just die
Midnight Run (story poem)
Within my head I have no doubt
The tears all ran dry
I will stalk you, till you let my spirit fly
Let me kiss,my now empty life goodby
but the gun beat seemed to rule
As your spirit he clutched
Stop blaming people for the choices you made.
I watched you saunter out of my door, my life to soon
They where what I inhale
Warrior's song
peering out into the light
They seem to go on for centuries
that my soul hates the bright--
Enough is a enough grow the ****
Soul is never here or there
They where my air
You had my heart
who foreshadowed tragedy.
you reap what you sow.
My life will never again be the same
i suppose because no one wants to hear me speak
Gnashing beneath the hovering darkness, a
Surly the fates could forsee
Thats what my scars are all about
In you I had finally found
Into the passage between here and there
and bombs thrown in the wind.
Life is what you make it.
Your laughter repaired my broken heart
I found my joy for life in your arms
and he sang to ignore,
He escorted you away from the pain
That pain is caused by your faults.
So thin red lines will etch my skin
Up.
And the bird, he sang
Untitled
I roam the house hearing your laughter
to deny transition.
to a lost melody
How sweet it would be to let out life's last sigh
You chased away my demons with your charms
That negative seed that you nourished when  planted was surely to grew.
You where my soul
Thin Red Lines ( Trigger Warning)
Why did you leave without me
I would crumble, shatter, splinter into bits
The memories of you linger like your cologne
All to show the agony within Here we go once again
My bliss
Is one less scream that sounds
How I dread its incessant pull
Grim Reaper let me clarify
If only you would have stayed with me that night
But I refuse to open that door.
the dark seems safer for me
E'er threatening possession of my mind
Nothing more agonizing than that chill
I can hear her knocking,
I let the razor glide thru my vain
That with the blood the pain flows out.
But the bird, he sang
Nothingness
He whistled all he could
How, oh how could this be our fate
to a rotting beat
too much to grasp
Of the Grim Reaper's touch
With every drop that hits the ground
Endless ****** up realities
I can't live without my missing parts
Of the taste of the realm of nothingness
With the stream I won't explode
Why did you have to go
too much to comprehend
I'll be just like that annoying magpie
Misery hates to be alone.
I'm slitting my wrist and you know why
Your car had skidded and flipped in the rain
My spirit you won't be able to deny
'make it stop!', my inner voice screams
if you give half *** efforts,
this is a chronologically written story of pain
up to the stars
for darkness brings only quiet
and I keep wanting just to clasp
of the lack of humanity
Quote 2
For now all alone in our bed I sit
"People nowadays only see with their eyes. That is why they are so easy to be fooled."
I won't implode
Ne'er ending nightmare of infinite nothingness
Your love making was a piece of art
Under the soft white glare of the moon
Within my head resides all the memories
i don't even know why i write it
Such is the miracle of a near-death your
its safety and its comfort
That helps mask the feeling of you being gone, me alone
But only the moon seen that tragic sight
you get half *** results.
The last bird flew away
as I fall in a heap onto the cold, hard ground...
Why didn't I go with you, because this isn't right
I miss our playful banter
Only to subtract your happiness.
Your comforting words in the middle of my despair
The stars where the only witne  ss to the ceremony
Feeling so **** numb inside
Take credit for what you are responsible for.
Your heart was what made my blood circulate
The black marks on the road is all that gives a testimony
So I can once again be with my guy
Now I'll sing of my greatest fear
and light brings all the sound  
that no one wants to read
Why did you have to go out that night
In the plain beyond, in the sweet by-and-by
behind missiles and prickles
Randomized from poems found under the tag "Pain". https://soundcloud.com/anton-kooistra/where-all-the-civilised-remain
Anton Kooistra Feb 2016
Ugly feel like love
know time make words
girl leave just touch
skin want beautiful door

little wasn't people strong
night head untitled war
breath help kiss woke
clearly morning look questions

used wanted lost couldn't
face really feelings away
deep body making what's
wish movies push oh

thought tight locked fine
trying built fairy stand
tale man fear heart
need remember stray looking

place drops small close
told beautifully worm lot
longer hurt cared mind
understand looks crave day

soul things wanting far
world high tongue mark
wishing says break pretty
knew women hoping got

doubt tear mistakes quickly
felt climb inside gave
actions sleep spent mean
eyes life came hide

muse say ensure live
play way hair reason
shook sighed flags proudly
juice forest crease chimes

pondered admire occurred flavors
escape invisible joys chase
lingered ringing knocked delight
touching spider tough hungry

tame tickle silken fat
ended confused wall covered
nightmare doing coloured blissed
possible perished pictures beast

quick unwanted asking wash
spit walked nook failed
toes liked men woods
screen innocent busy closer

escapes anytime pity graceful
eat swim graves bare
butterflies insecurities confusion wolf
release neck honest throwing

gaping dear survive meat
blame tower crooked soap
moat mechanism censure stomachs
nickname meshed crocodiles puns

****** freshman inscription ugliness
*** ignoring grinding messy
jumbled excites credits realisation
wrinkle chaotic mulled blots

saliva moats unbecoming choreography
10 12 11 61
wars' hear pssy cemen
untitled love un-assured namesroll

man's wouldn't we'd excusing
traders charismatic ******* zit
kush fleeted archways you've
she's doesn't happy-pain *******

nervous carrying understood web
sentences conscious pound ceases
hurts metaphors wrist tag
kid sell hateful crisp

terrible howl deemed brighter
fuzzy boring movie continuing
usually pig swore curl
homeless cradled addiction spins

rerun responding bruise naturally
chuckled elaborate alternative endlessly
brace brimming myth offers
outcome hurry witch darker


portray habit fortune sensations
tooth nicer dug truth
change needed teeth finger
freshly courage believe hole

private building infested ink
end weak kissed good f
all thinking pain sky
beauty power happen ask

messages weary able days
broken awkward finally bridge
doors naive decided actually
parallel trail leaving matter

flew hope new living
think hopeless shadows knowing
leaves stay worlds greedy
turn lies clear soft

lips breathing hold hands
caress taste speak extra
tell naked moment role
thoughts alright goes smile

light stone walls does
home tangled moons selfish
coward death fears die
year lay self peace

house story earth slow
seat shall watch lust
left blood set bone
long moon human mystery

forced chance hour ran
follow scars rage vs
reply watching mirror forbidden
rushing filled choose flawless

heat cold happy numb
sounds line page imagine
streets bundled dry passionate
determined breaths game cheek

roll stays locking sweat
sudden splash purpose crack
moisture breaks regardless makeup
lone foetus burns sorrows
treat ***** brown known
internal hearts boy walking
minds kept cycle born
sat waiting underneath hidden

greatest heartbreak tears care
bed miss moan gentle crossed
figure saw princess warmth
places resist universe memory

moving immortal belong knows
insane beg knees free
makes especially feeling smells
nature lives wars water

share woman simply pride
mud yes called space
Taken from words, randomized and rearranged, for recording.
Anton Kooistra Feb 2016
you came over for Christmas
but my love
none really.
Even when you're not here

But I promise to be collected
sorry.
halloween
how i spent
use it
remember when
and cannot
for once
I wanna kiss and hug you when youre sad.
myself
if i could
Wipe your face
the thing
Promise me a forever
for what i did.
now that it's over
and we both
When will they leave.

for nobody to see

but i can't bring myself
getting a costume ready
content
regrets
you can have it
my heart did love
You're beautiful no matter what mood you're in
sweet

i need
i wish none of it had happened
remember when
non stop
It flourishes on its own;
and i am
i had finally
from getting hurt
to go out
Here are some tissues,
apathy.
remember when
to me,
the one person
so happy
nothing
in hopes
Hold me down i know your stronger
giving me
stupid mistakes
maybe
to get hurt
from contacting you

bad decisions
Where are you?
Girls sometimes get stuck with destruction
worry
so i tried to push myself
wallow
Its because there is nothing that is bad.
remember
Here is my shoulder,
I don't look forward, I keep looking back

Then it must be maintained.
to other people
They revolve around serious issues;

I feel you by my side
over the person i love

Someday it will be too late - no way to run from you

While our love grows older.
again.

with nobody
Pressure tight
ANOTHER POEM YOU WON'T READ
I should've listened to you.
with someone
a second
not that you care.
over my mistakes
be with you
Of thing that could never fade.
not a
Only now I'm realizing I ******* up the most by losing you
I've grown ten more feet, strong fresh shoots.
i hoped
Every couple fights,
chance.
that i selfishly
i am not

because i am

what i would lose
and i came over
To the good times we ever had
not that it matters,
I wanna poke your cheeks,
i hope i get my **** together too.
We get put here because we come to think that is all we amount to
it makes me want
to give my love
i soiled
there's no excuse
but i'm rotten
and anytime my phone buzzed
Girls don't want guys who abuse them
For love is something
i would go back to december
and when you're happy,
we were *******
I can never be alone
i didn't catch
in sight
i want to tell you why
to love me
i did catch her?
Cease it shall not,
and play hearthstone
for what i did.
thoughtful
none.
remember
It is okay to cry,
to.
Through and through.
That cannot be taught.
and snuggled
i do love you,
Wipe your face,
and spoil everything

but i need
I will bleed it
you loved it

who are interested in me
and try
only reason i can give
some day tomorrow.
i miss
Trying to get warm

you say something to me
and make myself
I want to be so warm
in some subconscious attempt
i would go back to last week
Girls don't want guys that just use them
those times.
Guys sometimes can't handle construction
with a bunch of pillows
So your eyes will dry.
i felt

to snuggle with it
achieved
staying warm

Look at all the clones
messaging me.
sure
i can be
or sleep with it.
remember
Dirt
of doing something good

Lean on me now and forever,

for you
you moved for the first time

to break down
for my own insecurities
your reaction

i had been working on
jigglypuff
but it's not love
E(motion)al
i have men
Guys don't want girls who act ******
Bite into the bone,
bought me that giant

i miss you
didn't want
just
and my mom
That is very true,
when we first met
how i would sit on your bed
no success
it was you
and insecurely
and tell myself
now
Can you laden my bones?
Lean on it always,
tell me you want to die
How bold it is;
snuggling
if i could
Here are some tissues.
and tell myself
that are to keep me
it is yours
who loved me
You're  locked in my heart, Forever...
However, it is the type
I should've left all the negative in my life and quit drinking, smoking, stealing.

to keep myself
Needing you
i don't want you, i don't need you, but i have to
Just scream it,

It is okay to cry,
that is the
but when
I can't repeat myself an longer

of my depression

for months
Where have you gone.
i hope i stop treating people like this.
i am alone
my shiny
i took it home with me
and slept on your floor


you'll never fall behind.
Laden my bones hold me down my dear spouse.
and we made a nest
Our obstacles are no burden,
you were actually
Here are some tissues,
Can you laden my bones
it may seem like i don't care

i didn't think
the walls i've built
should have known
i can't
thats when i make mistakes.
Skeleton Love
we loved it
occupying myself
I'm breaking breaking away from the roots
was so sweet
Scrape it along the break
know that.

and we couldn't get enough of each other
perfectly
who i do not have anymore
i don't have motivation to do it,
Anchor me to home
to delete his number
i hope i grow up too.

if you want.
the summer
then.
fuzzy blanket?

so much money
other than
and tickle you when you're mad.
distractions.

i was so upset
and i don't deserve it.
Baby, it is okay to cry,
but worse than that
most of the time
with your own marrow
Guys don't want girls that get glitchy
with other interests
and i could still

does not want them
Fill my hollow
So your eyes will dry.
Crying Eyes
can't seem to look me in the eye
kind

i have nobody
And watch it climb the side of our old house
Randomized from poems found under the tag "Relationship".  (recording on soundcloud in progress)

— The End —