Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
1.7k · Mar 2022
mae Mar 2022
My entire life
is in a backpack
because even if where we stay isn't the same
as the day before,
at least the stuff I carry
in this backpack
is the same stuff every day.
mae Feb 2022
Someday my bones will protrude,
pushing up like daisies across the fields of my skin,
because I have died over and over,
every day I died,
and this one last time I will be beautiful and sunken in,
and this last time Ana will have controlled me;
when Ana said she wanted me dead,
I knew she would someday make it happen.
Because I cannot afford to be saved,
someday I will be the one the funeral is for.
910 · Sep 2021
The Garden in Question
mae Sep 2021
There is a garden that I want to go,
a place where I can be alone,
a place where I will hang my head -
quite literally, because that's where I've planned to be dead.
864 · Jul 2021
Just Falling Short
mae Jul 2021
I thought I was enough,
giving your world all the things you needed and wanted,
I thought you were happy,
but I was always just falling short.

Your favourite colour was green,
so green was a theme I went with often and gave you most,
but who would have known your green was an envy that caused you to cheat,
and I finally found I was just falling short.
mae Jan 2022
For a while,
happiness was an issue
I ignored.

For a while, I laid in bed
Fell asleep in the morning,
woke in the evening,
and days became seconds,
and my summer was gone.

Winter has been going by
in such record time,
that these days I don't even bother checking my watch.
799 · Jan 2022
Drink Remix
mae Jan 2022
I miss my ex sometimes,
and while I'm sitting on my phone feeling sorry,
feeling bad,
I drink from a bottle of concentrated drink mix,
and I find out
he's become
a SoundCloud rapper,
what a remix.
706 · Jan 2019
mae Jan 2019
Last I checked the sink
Hadn't been full of water, overflowing
but now I see
the faucet is running because he left it on.
I dunno. This one is kinda vague.
677 · Sep 2021
mae Sep 2021
I am the sky, a wide expanse above you.
I am the ocean, I whisk you away and dangers lie within.
I am the iris, I'm hope, and wisdom,
and my courage is waning but it's there.
I am comfort.
I am worth it.
I am blue,
but not the blue you're used to.
I am not sadness. I am not misery. I am not unfriendliness.
I am blue,
but you're not ready for this blue.
mae Jul 2022
your words would set me ablaze,
a firepit for a stomach as it churns,
it burns,
and i am all warm inside

and all you did was give me the time of day.

all you did was speak to me so kindly,
and then
my face was red
and i shook.

maybe 5 am isnt the best time to rile me up...
not that i was complaining.
mae Feb 2022
There is definitely something going on here,
because my heart feels full,
and even in class I am sat,
because maybe I like him.
Maybe I really, really like him.
483 · Feb 2022
l o v e
mae Feb 2022
love is like
a cloud - its soft
and its nice
until it feels so heavy
that everything spills
out out out
and i dont want that to happen
with you.
457 · Sep 2021
mae Sep 2021
I write music.
I write music and I sing,
I sing a lot.
I play the piano,
I play piano and I write music and I sing.
432 · Sep 2021
Canned Coffee
mae Sep 2021
early morning
i drink
although all it will do
will tire me
i am bored in this class.
mae Mar 2022
Maybe I am the innocent.
Maybe I am the daisy flower on the side of railroad tracks,
I do not know the casualties from the train,
I am simply living here.

Maybe I am your god.
Maybe I am the statue in your church or the deity on your desk,
I am quite aware that you want me so,
I am ethereal in my living and I am quite the woman to love.

Maybe I am beautiful.
Maybe I am the girl you write red-inked love letters to and think of in dreams.
I know most will not like me, but I am beauty to you.
I am the girl that got away
344 · May 2021
Difference in a Dead Girl
mae May 2021
Maybe I will die finally!
Oh how sweet death will be, swooping in with arms of shadow,
the unknown a despairingly sweet smile in it's sorrow!

I miss him so dearly but he hath changed and so have I!
He, the void, a distant memory,
and I, the dead girl who made him so unhappy!

Maybe I will ask to be reborn as a prettier girl,
one he may like to talk to,
one who is thin and funny and looks like she came from a fairytale.
Someone who would look good living.

I made the poem on the other side,
Because I am tired.
I am tired of the everythings!
vague but hey, i miss my friend haha.
311 · May 2021
mae May 2021
Burning tongue,
I lie.

The wrongs are my rights,
the control I had was my vice.

Maybe through my destruction,
people will learn to respect me,
and maybe I'll learn to care.

292 · Oct 2021
mae Oct 2021
A little circle
it spins around and around and around
maybe I'm thinking too hard
Or maybe I'm just dizzy.
271 · Jul 2022
would it hurt?
mae Jul 2022
and so
if i kissed you now
would it hurt us?
and not the kind of hurt of passion bruised lips,
not the hurt of our lungs when we refuse to part,
but the hurt in our minds,
the ache in our hearts
when we know this will never work?
254 · Nov 2020
mae Nov 2020
Licking tears away with your warmth,
your sunshine dries them,
maybe they will taste good to you.
250 · Oct 2021
mae Oct 2021
I sat on the bench at night,
the street is much more lovely when illuminated by manmade shine,
but the darkness sat beside me.
I stared at the darkness, my new companion.
It stared back.
244 · Aug 2020
Early Morning Conversation
mae Aug 2020
Sitting out on the front step with you
Under stars in their last breath of this night
Coffee in hand
3 a.m.
We talk.
mae Apr 2021
when i think ive gotten past it
it creeps back up
it wraps its tendrils around me
a suffocating vice...

please help me cut away
before i disappear.
234 · Oct 2020
mae Oct 2020
I miss him most at nighttime,
when I cannot see him,
when he sinks below the ground,
and I cannot see him.

During the daytime,
he shines bright,
and his warm embrace is thrown upon me.
despite his being so far away.

And I feel his love no matter the time of day.
mae Nov 2021
i know im not actually a burden but -
do you hate me? am I annoying? do you want me to shut up?
i know its just my head being mean but -
you deserve better than me, you dont deserve this mess.
i know i can get better but -
i dont deserve help, I'm only going to get worse.
I know I should be medicated but -
i dont have the money, and do I really deserve it?
I know I could just escape the void, but -
it calls my name, it beckons me.
I know maybe people do care, but -
maybe I'll really do it.
216 · Oct 2021
mae Oct 2021
a small space
between being
and not being
and i would like to be
but the world so hates me
and wants me to not be
but i will fight to be me.
i will.
mae Apr 2021
the way my lips felt after a kiss from you,
a spark that I can never find with anyone else
the way your hand felt with mine,
my stress like ice under the skin of my hands while yours were a warm summer sun to melt it away
the way you spoke to me,
your words gentle like a breeze I know from places too far gone to remember...
your touch was gentle, and
if I didn't know any better,
I would say maybe I could feel it again,
but life is cruel, and liking me was your mistake.

But I will always wait anyway,
even if they day we get back together
happens to be never.
Am I heartbroken? Yes. Am I writing about it? Yes.
mae Oct 2021
being dropped from a height
can be quite terrifying
so why would you let me do that?
why would you drop me?
198 · Sep 2021
Energy Can
mae Sep 2021
A Monster a day keeps my sleepiness at bay,
I am either sleeping 15 hours or am awake for 4 days,
I hate to sleep because nightmares plague my poor brain,
but if I stay awake too long then my body's in pain,
I'd much rather not have to sleep at all,
but it's human nature.
I am human. Unfortunately.
197 · Oct 2020
Sunshine Hills
mae Oct 2020
In love with sunshine
so far away,
yet if I try hard enough I can feel it,
maybe this will last,
maybe this will last.
185 · Jan 2022
mae Jan 2022
maybe you just hate me,
giving my love like it's just nothing,
surface level loves making me go crazy,
please just say you hate me.
180 · Sep 2021
Wrong Place
mae Sep 2021
I am putting this poem
on the other side
because I like to think that I am unpredictable
when in reality
I am sub par.
177 · Oct 2020
mae Oct 2020
Because you shine so brightly
and I will follow you forever
I will likely get sunburn,
but this time I don't mind so much.
mae Sep 2022
stars taken down from the heavens spun
spun in the darkened corners of my vision
as i told you
and you looked at me,
by my repulsivity and utter lack of love
for the girl that I had let waste away
in many a dream.
and still i work to frame a perfection i can doubt to have
in this lifetime and more
because if not perfect,
what left will i have to be?
160 · Sep 2021
Why I Write
mae Sep 2021
there are many nice words,
some more eloquent, others simple
but still beautiful in their simplicity,
and I use these to accurately (or as accurate as I can get)
to express the intense emotions I feel with my whole chest
with my whole head.
I write
because it's my freedom.
153 · Oct 2020
Happy Little Tree
mae Oct 2020
I sat under a tree,
it felt like sunshine,
it felt like smiles from him.
I sat under that tree every day in the summer,
come fall it didn't feel the same,
come winter it was cut down,
and come spring I planted a new one.
152 · Aug 2022
mae Aug 2022
what's a good way to say i love you?
what's the best way to really explain to you
the love that i feel for you?


no matter where this goes
whether there's more in store for us or not...
you're not HIM,
you're not the villain in my story, and you'll always be far from it.
you could never hurt me the way  HE did.
and although your words carry more weight than HIS ever did,
not once have you ever weaponised your words against me.
and you're real to me.
you're real.
so ******* real.

even from here, you're real.
me when um...... yeah kdshfkdsjh sorry im bad at words <3
140 · Oct 2020
mae Oct 2020
as easily as I fall in love
I fall out
as if I'm going off a cliff
and as if the sky is falling with me

the sunshine follows me
no matter how far down I go
the sun will go where I go
dare I fall for him too.
131 · Nov 2020
mae Nov 2020
Rip me open,
rip rip rip,
until you see nothing but a shock of white,
my stuffing spills out onto the floor,
and now you have a mess to clean up,
and I am oddly empty.
125 · Nov 2021
Have Fun
mae Nov 2021
Have fun with your guilt,
the gnawing feeling deep in your soul,
because of what you did to me,
I hate you and you deserve to feel bad.

Have fun with your anger,
the boiling lava filling your pores,
because of the hurt you caused me,
I hate you and you deserve to hate yourself too.

Have fun with your fear,
the electricity that runs through your nerves,
because of the fear you initially caused me,
I hate you and you deserve to be afraid.
122 · Aug 2020
Will I?
mae Aug 2020
If I run fast enough,
Will I ever catch you?

If I scream loud enough,
Will I ever be heard?

If I show you my love,
Will I ever get the chance to call you mine?
116 · Oct 2020
mae Oct 2020
No matter how bright the sunlight is,
and no matter how much I love it,
he cannot save me from destruction,
self destruction...
words at their finest still hurt...
so I will wilt away,
and nobody will ever find me.
111 · Aug 2020
mae Aug 2020
Missing what I do not yet have,
texts of "I love you" filling a heart that weeps
and it does so weep for him.
110 · Aug 2020
mae Aug 2020
Too far apart to tell,
one sleeps.
Too soon to tell,
the other beats awake.
106 · Aug 2020
mae Aug 2020
You make me feel like the world might be okay.
No matter what ashes burn my eyes,
No matter who does me wrong,
You give me that one thing I never I thought I would have,
in this crumbling world of hate and destruction.

You give me hope.
103 · Sep 2021
Wet Paint
mae Sep 2021
my hands are on a wall of wet paint.
if i dont move them, itll dry on my hands,
if i do, the paint is on my hands anyway.
make a move, or stay this way?
i am full of cracks anyway.
maybe i can be freed.
100 · Jan 2021
At The Back of the Head (1)
mae Jan 2021
Dear White Lies I was told as a child,
though you came from the mouths of people I trusted the most,
still I was betrayed by you.
You came in the form of
“I love you,”
and “you’ll be okay,”
and “I’ll never leave.”
You were sharper than a knife and you twisted at my heart
until finally it bled out onto a paper that would never be read by anyone else but you and I.
I trashed a note that would make more of you enter into my brain
and grow until finally you looked down upon me
as if I were nothing more than a bug
compared to you.
95 · Oct 2020
mae Oct 2020
You wrap your icy fingers around my petals,
around me,
and you squeeze squeeze squeeze,
until I escape and hide inside,
and warm myself by the fire,
safe in my flowerpot.
mae Nov 2022
i had my heart broken
what felt like one too many times
in my short life on earth,
and although i resented those who broke it,
and resented myself more for allowing it all to happen,
over and over and over...
it was worth it
seeing as i have my love,
and he loves so hard,
and so fully,
and i feel it so deep within myself
it makes me cry.

it was all worth it to have you.
mae Oct 2020
You have your ways,
your sunshine-y ways
you are perfect,
you are bright,
you are true.
Though we haven't talked too long,
I will say that I love you.
mae Jul 2022
i learned happiness from someone else
found my light in a boy i could never begin to love healthily
and although we talk,
he's no longer enough
and my courage shrinks smaller with every day that passes
and i thought maybe cutting myself open
and finding that small coal of a sun in me
would help me
would show me its there
but its dead
goodbye forever

in another life
i was probably happy without attention
from boys who just wanted to ***** me.

this is not that life.

to be fair,
the sunlight i found was not pleasant,
and it burned me like any sun would had i gotten to close
i tried my best to be there, but i was there much too often
and i didnt protect myself!
how silly!
with the lack of protection when being so close to him,
i burned,
and the brilliant ball of flame that was the man i had fallen for
hurt me without knowing it
and even now,
whilst i imagine ripping my sun-burnt skin off
and  relieve myself of the pain of his kindness,
i would still let him be close.

i would still let him be close
because although i know what he wants of me
i know the sin he sees in his mind when he speaks to me,
pretending to be lovers
is still better to me
than just being his friend.

i will depend on the sunshine that others provide for me
all of my life
and although its unhealthy,
nobody's ******* healthy.

the truth is that i cant be my own sunshine.
but i will not cry anymore over what could have been.
Next page