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Angel Level Apr 2018
****
Why am i such a failure
I thought
Finally
It'll be better
But it's not
and i don't think it will ever be
Angel Level Mar 2018
It's so dark here
In this place that was once so bright
The moment i stepped in
Out went the lights
Angel Level Feb 2018
I wake up in an unknown room
With needles sticking out of both my hands and one in my arm
There is a tube down my throat and i cant figure out why im still breathing
I look around with blurry eyes
And here the beeps with foggy ears
I look up to see clear bags on poles connected to the needles
I feel like i can hear the slow drip drip drip of the liquid flowing through those tubes
I know it is impossible but i could feel those drips
They were like tiny earth quakes in my hands
That shook me to my coar
A smiling blonde nurse walks in and takes the tube out of my throat
Her name is McKenzie
McKenzie tells me how I was life flighted to spokane
How i have been in a coma for 4 days
How my heart rate was above 170
How my dog found me
laying on the concrete floor covered in my own ****
But all i can hear is the incessant beeping of machines
All i can hear is the sound of my own failure
I took so many pills i lost track after 150
I could still feel the steel knife against my skin
I was so careful
So sure
Well
They always say third times the charm.
Angel Level Jan 2018
I am alone
I think at this point i have become part of the void
I float among the stars
Aimlessly
Thoughtlessly
As i try to keep my grip on reality
It drips through my fingers like oil
cascading into the darkness
bleh
Angel Level Jan 2018
his lips caress my collar bone
as his hands begin to roam
the sounds of shaking breath
skin against skin
and moaning voices
echos into the stars
inviting pleasure in
his finger tips gripping my hips
are all thats keeping me from floating into space
rough words whispered in sweet tones
are all that are convincing me this is reality
the bruises he leaves behind after he's done
just remind me of what once was
and once they disappear again
i go crawling back for more
bleh i only write this stuff because im alone in the world
Angel Level Jan 2018
Who am i too mourn what was never mine
Tears have been shed time after time
I see you driving by
And i cry even though you were never mine
My love was from afar
But you knew that from the start
Like a flame i burned too hot
Scorching your skin when you tried to get close
So instead of wearing heat resistant clothing
You chose to ******* away
Here's one from deeeeeeeeeeep in my archives like way down there
Angel Level Jan 2018
Stop
Stop it
Stop touching me
Stop talking to me
Stop breathing near me
Just stop
Every brush of your hand
Makes me feel as if there are ants under my skin trying to come out of my finger tips
Every sound you make
Feels like a million birds are screeching in terror
Every breath you take
Is one less time my heart beats
I shake at the mere mention of your name
My body aches from old wounds when i scroll past your picture
My heart races in fear when i see you glance from across the room
I can no longer take this
I can no longer breath
So might as well stop my heart from beating
Wow this is no bueno my dudes but thats alright sometimes ya just gotta get out the bad ones
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