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Sep 12 · 356
War
NM Sep 12
War
Loving you was like going to war;
I never came back the same.
.
.
.
Not to be too "EdGy" here, but still in the process of healing and overcoming having left a severely abusive relationship.
Sep 12 · 855
It hurts...
NM Sep 12
I sat with my anger long enough,
Until it told me it's real name was grief.
.
.
.
Aug 2 · 210
:)
NM Aug 2
:)
You will find many different kinds of people throughout your life,
Try not to find yourself in any.
You are you.
They are they.
Aug 1 · 454
Promiscuity
NM Aug 1
All that money, and yet, still so cheap.
Based upon deep pain and resentment I have had forever regarding being cheated on and compared to *******/cam models.
.
.
Sad how loyalty is nothing but a casual game now and people only want/look for "temporary bliss"...but to each their own I suppose.
Jul 25 · 635
Kindness
NM Jul 25
Loaning someone your strength instead of reminding them of their weakness.
Stay kind.
Jul 19 · 306
Summer
NM Jul 19
It is so hot out,
Yet,
I feel so cold.
</3
Jul 9 · 366
Dolor
NM Jul 9
<3
.
.
You are gone.
And I will miss you for as long as I told you I would love you.
.
.
</3
One of "those nights" in which I feared.
When you feel everything all at once as if it were the first time.
Jun 29 · 231
Best Friend
NM Jun 29
And the truth is,
Dogs are a little more human -than most humans.
Why I love dogs so much. <3
Something random, casual and lighthearted.
Inspired off the quote:
"A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself."
Jun 29 · 75
Convenient
NM Jun 29
You only want me when I leave.
And that is no reason to stay.
Past experience in toxic relationships.
Also with those who I call "ghosters" who only ever see it worth to talk to you when it's convenient for them and only ever are temporary people.
Jun 26 · 219
leniency
NM Jun 26
I am not the person I want to be yet.
But...
I am trying not to be too ******* the one I am now.
I have never been the person to give love to myself or put myself first.
Nor has it ever been me to love myself at all as much as I do the rest of the world.
Slowly, I am learning...
If not, co-existing into the home that is a body.
Jun 26 · 94
1:05 AM
NM Jun 26
Time, please be patient with us;
We do not heal as fast as you fly.
Random insomnia notes
Jun 26 · 213
Some days
NM Jun 26
Some days,
I do nothing but remember to breathe;
And some days,
That is enough.
...
Trying to hold on.
Jun 25 · 1.9k
Healing
NM Jun 25
If you don't heal what hurt you,

You'll bleed on people who didn't cut you.
</3
Jun 19 · 331
Lone Wolf
NM Jun 19
People run in packs because they don't feel safe alone.

I run alone because I don't feel safe in packs.
Thought to reshare. (:
Jun 12 · 955
"You are beautiful."
NM Jun 12
Confidence says: "Thank you!"

Arrogance says: "I know I am."
Learn the difference.
.
.
.
Stay humble. :)
Jun 4 · 178
Cigarettes
NM Jun 4
Don't let people treat you like a cigarette, who only use you when they're bored and step on you when they're done.
May 23 · 194
Awake
NM May 23
Real eyes,
Realize.
Not sure what this is. Lol
May 16 · 46
Loss
NM May 16
I have always been so afraid of losing people that it took me a long time to understand that I am somebody who can be lost too.
12:30 AM
May 16 · 182
Recovery
NM May 16
May the pains that you carry, be as heavy as the crown that will be placed upon your head.
Recovery is always worth it.
Successes, big or small, will always be crowned in the end.
Never give up.

If you have a hard time believing you can do it, I will believe all of it for you. <3
You aren't alone, your strengths have given me my own. :)
May 16 · 711
Floral
NM May 16
Some people are flowers, meant to be loved from afar.

They shouldn't be plucked, just to die between your fingers.
(Personal vent)
May 16 · 121
Answers
NM May 16
Prayers are answered by the universe,
not through grand revelations,
but tiny little moments.
At least for me anyways.
May 14 · 130
Grandmother
NM May 14
Why, how, what?
Are the things I asked,
As my tears,
Fell against the cold, clear glass.

I don't want to hear it,
Make it go away,
They're lying grandmother,
This news can't possibly be true,
Believe me, I prayed.

Now here we are,
"I promise I will be fine!"
Little do you know Grandmother,
Your battles are now mine.
We found out my grandmother's cancer has just come back again and she has just started treatment and it's killing me having to see her go through it.
3-4 Years ago when she first had it, I wasn't made aware what was going on so I wasn't as present and didn't understand fully...
Now that I do, it is one of the most painful things I am going through.
I can't eat, sleep, think, focus and I am doing EVERYTHING that I can for her. Anything to be both a caregiver and a support as her granddaughter.
Yet, deep down I can't cope. It's an agony I wouldn't wish on anyone.
I am angry at everyone, yet at the same time I don't want to be alone, but I don't want to bother anyone. I feel terrible.
I don't know what to do...
But against all the dark thoughts I am fighting, she is the main reason I am staying strong.
I have been told that I am as much of her best "medicine" as she is for me, and that very idea alone, is what is keeping me here.

Other than that, I am lost.
May 14 · 188
Riptide
NM May 14
I'm wrestling with a thousand voices inside.
The stillness of water that I so deeply loved,
has become a riptide.
</3
May 14 · 82
Alien
NM May 14
I feel like an invader in my skin,
Show me,
Help me,
To own it once again.
Been more and dissociative lately,
I hate the feeling of being able to look into a mirror, and not see yourself,
Or never feel at home inside your own skin.
Apr 28 · 210
PTSD
NM Apr 28
Pain
That
Sends
Despair
Those moments in the middle of the night that come rushing back, warping reality...
Those will be my downfall.
Apr 17 · 113
Hell
NM Apr 17
I may not know your demons,
But if you need someone to walk beside you through Hell,
I am here.
I am always here for anyone. <3
Apr 16 · 175
Lesson
NM Apr 16
The truth is, you learn a little more about yourself every-time someone says goodbye.
</3
Mar 21 · 323
Let it out
NM Mar 21
Do not ever worry about dumping the entire ocean on us, we have all drowned in it before.
To anyone who needs a reminder that you are never alone and your silence doesn't have to be the end.
Many of us care and many will listen, for me I always will.
Also inspired by the quote ""Spill your emotions, or be prepared to drown in them."
Mar 15 · 138
Circle
NM Mar 15
If you look at the people in your circle and don't get inspired, then you don't have a circle, you have a cage.
Mar 11 · 187
Listen
NM Mar 11
Only those who truly care about you, will hear you when you are quiet.
:)
Mar 10 · 1.8k
Overthinking
NM Mar 10
The art of creating problems that do not exist.
Been doing this a lot lately. ):
Mar 2 · 135
Moving on
NM Mar 2
Even if you're not here to stay, I'm happy the universe allowed your soul to stop by.
Recently my 3 year relationship ended.
Though I do not feel any emotions yet, I am sure that one random night around 2AM will be there.
Here is to moving on to focus on more important things.
Mar 2 · 252
Grow
NM Mar 2
Stop trying to shrink into places that you have already outgrown.
Feb 26 · 159
Binge
NM Feb 26
Only then did I realize I was starving for something food could no longer satisfy.
Lately I have been battling Bulimia and this was just a random awareness I thought admist a declining health.
Feb 17 · 141
Travel
NM Feb 17
Truth is, life is full of thunderstorms.
And we're all driving as fast as we can to escape the dark clouds overhead.
But every now and then, we pass under a bridge.
And for that split second,
There's quiet...
There's tranquility...
There's peace.
And in that brief moment, we forget the rain.
Feb 10 · 87
Birth
NM Feb 10
Once upon a time,
Fact and fiction fell in love and gave birth to poetry.
:)
Feb 8 · 313
Cost
NM Feb 8
I gave you $20 but you left me for someone who gave you $30.
They had $100, I had $20.
Based upon years of being left and forgotten in many areas.  
It's hard for me to trust and make any friends anymore.
I barely have established a stable relationship due to issues and past of being cheated on, abandonment, being ghosted, and always being that someone who was never someone's first choice or friend.
And yet, I still love and get too easily attached.
I can never be angry or hold resentment...
I just wish others who know this pain, didn't.
Feb 7 · 94
Time
NM Feb 7
I wear a broken watch on my left wrist
To convey that,
Time is not always right.
Just something random and simple
Feb 7 · 451
Drain
NM Feb 7
The pools of water in my eyes,
Blur my vision,
But for once,
I'm okay with not seeing.
Jan 19 · 371
Stranger
NM Jan 19
I sought comfort in the arms of strangers and suddenly became a stranger to myself.
Be careful how much of yourself you give.
All my life I have prioritized others instead of myself every time.
Be it money, time, help, giving, and love.
I love humanity more than myself, and more than often...I have ignored the pain of being used or taken advantage of.
I hate admitting to myself that I need to take care of myself too, just because it feels selfish.
But after helping so many, there came a point where I looked around and asked myself, "Who am I?"

Helping others...
But I lost a lot of energy and used my years building other people instead of my own.

I really hope this doesn't sound arrogant.
Because it's literally the last thing I care to be.
Jan 19 · 148
Deep Waters
NM Jan 19
Allow me to dive into your mind,
If I fail to **** the sharks, I'll learn how to swim with them.
Based upon my relationship in which over three years now, we have both learned to better care and understand each other's "deep waters".
It's been a joruney of tears, pain and lessons.
But we are now engaged and have grown and learned so much now!
Jan 19 · 152
Reflection
NM Jan 19
Don't be at war with your reflection in the mirror,
A piece of glass cannot see how divine the spirit can be.
<3
Jan 14 · 194
Coming out
NM Jan 14
And so I poured myself
Inside my fears,
And they had no power over me
Any longer.
Officially came out as Pansexual today!
Jan 14 · 92
Ghosts
NM Jan 14
The thought of ghosts stopped scaring me,
When I realized,
I was more dead then they would ever be.
Relating to the numbness I get alongside Depression, it's god awful.
Jan 10 · 1.4k
Self
NM Jan 10
As I was
f
a
l
l
I
n
g


a
p
a
r
t,
I came together
To the person
I had to become.
:)
Jan 10 · 125
Judgemental
NM Jan 10
Everyone is full of opinions about
What I should do,
Where I should go,
Who I should be,
And who should I talk to;

When they can't even look inside their own bags to clean their dirt.
Frustration.
Old vent.
Jan 10 · 255
Perception
NM Jan 10
It's difficult to remind yourself,
That you are not just a perception of what others make you,
But that you are more than that.

You are your laugh,
And all those times when you couldn't get up,
But found the strength within yourself to make it through.

Don't let others be the only source of reflection.
❤️
Jan 4 · 1.5k
Pain
NM Jan 4
Hurt people,
Hurt people.
I often spend hours at night reflecting or having memories of past abuse and trauma. I am the type to see the level of pain in my abusers than evil. It makes me sad and often...
Has made me look crazy for giving them forgiveness and empathy from a lot of people.
No one is born evil, be it an illness, pain, or even trauma themselves...
I at least try to see some reality in it all.

I don't know, that's just me.
Dec 2018 · 101
Nightmares
NM Dec 2018
There are many who don't wish to sleep for the fear of nightmares.
Sadly, there are many who don't wish to wake for the same fear.
Dec 2018 · 102
Just a Note :)
NM Dec 2018
Don't worry if you feel low; the sun has a sinking spell every night,
But rises again the next morning.
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