Someone stole my color
And threw it to the wind
Scattered like ashes
I don’t know if I’ll ever find it

Someone stole my color
From the face I know so well
I saw it in the cotton candy clouds
And the teal ocean swell

Someone stole my color
I guess that’s where it went
The world looks so much brighter
Like something heaven-sent

Someone stole my color
And that’s what no one knows
Depression isn’t black
It’s the color of a rose

It’s the light orange in a sunset
And the yellow of a peach
Light blue, my favorite color
So simply out of reach

Purple like my favorite eyeshadow
No, lavender, I’d guess you’d say
And my favorite music artist
Although he has passed away

Someone stole my color
Now everything’s too bright
I suppose sometimes darkness
Isn’t the opposite of light

Someone stole my color
So I’ll wear grey and black
As if in mourning
Until I get it back

I want to drink your breath
And smell you on me
Hear your angel voice
Taste your insides
Feel you tremble
From my fingers
Or my words
My tongue
Or me

it’s hard to tell
where it ends
and “I” begin.

There is no heartbreak
Like the one that comes
With losing yourself

The world can’t see me like this.
Not again.
The people who look, a given,
but certainly not the ocean—
the moon, the sunset, the tide.
They have known me in a different life.

You took my talk as truth,
and proposed a compromise.
So I donned an unfamiliar sweatshirt,
a black cap and glasses.
Though you had nothing to hide from
By any stretch or reach
You and me went incognito to the beach.

I used to be no good at taking pills
Couldn’t even swallow a tiny Advil
Dad made me practice with M&Ms and Skittles
But I’ve gotten much more practice since I’ve been ill

Maybe it’s the subtle taste or the horrible smell
That makes the remedy for my cerebral hell
I can’t even begin to show or tell
How badly I wish I was well

Depression, what a horrible thing to catch
Feeling like one in a bad batch
Are these pills a remedy or just a small patch
Or better yet, has evil met its match?

So give me your devil
And just in case you’re skeptical
I’ll raise you my chemicals
Chalky, fishy, colorful, inedible

Never take movement for granted
because some time you will become
Immobilized
by depression
or a busted knee
or some other affliction
of the body
& mind

Aren’t they really one?
Can you have one without the other?
You need your mind to move
You need to move to feed your mind
So what happens then
when both refuse to operate?
I guess that brings me to my second point
Never take your mind for granted

I don’t want to wash my sheets
because after all this time
they smell like me
finally
some remnant to keep
of me
and sanity

You can’t fake a spark
But I miss our fireworks
We lit up the night

I just can’t seem to
distance myself
from you

Was it the look you gave me
When I walked in the room unannounced
Or on the fourth floor off to the side,
With my face nuzzled in your neck,
Soaking in your smell,
Wishing every breath I took could be like this one.
What about my fingers
Running through those tangled curls,
Touching all the special parts of you
While our bodies dance and swoon together.
And then there’s everything small,
Like the way you say my name surprised,
Three knocks on the bathroom wall,
The magical message you leave
When you give me a call.

For a time we loved in a bubble of bliss
I never knew I could miss--
But I'll see you there tonight
When I dream of your kiss.

I need some answers now
because I’m running out of steam
Is this a daunting reality
or a terrible ******* dream