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4 u
4 u
Hair on your face
twinkle on your nose
beautiful lips & a heavenly soul

i feel myself squint
i feel my heart melt
my love begins & and my arms give out
I'm afraid.
I don't make a point to accommodate it.
But it's here,
Seeking composition.
Gripping my nerves and taking them out for a spin.

When it's contextualized,
And becomes the loudest voice.
When it's partnered up with doubt,
And becomes compound.
When it's anointed a constable,
Whom whispers disinformation.
When it presses anxiety,
And plays cowardice.
When thoughts turn into patterns,
And my hubris dwarfs enough to fit inside a paper cup.
When  my center becomes a deafening storm of pain.
And hiccups of rage fill my hands.

I am made to remember fragility,
my sanity  is a pebble Loose on a river’s stream
gently flowing into the arms of vulnerability.
Ad infinitum
You should be here with me
Living inside a whisper
Meditating, We could become a single cloud of consciousness
You should be here with me
Sitting on a smile
Laughing together in a huggggg
Riding an electrical stream of hopeful wishes
Instead i live in a box full of mirrors
Instead I'm creating illusions
Instead I'm in a state of confusion
Yo naci para morder te
Acercate que en la noche hace mucho frío
Mis espinas son mis pies,
Mis pétalos, son mis labios.  
Por aquí aveces pasa la Luna,
Dormida y llena  
Yo Celoso, el viento aveces me lleva torpe.
Con un dolor profundo en mi alma.
me pongo a llorar y sonreir
Al fin llega la amanecer
Al fin puedo dormir
I wrote this on a dare
Two silhouettes,
danced barefoot in the dark,
seduced by a rhythm
were lost within a hug

Two souls
paired in the evening
roaring with giggles,
were lulled into a small embrace,
Inches away from love

Two flames
stood soft in the night
infinitely lost
turned into a star.
Stellar are the children that dream
Stellar are the oceans that breathe and feed,
Conceptual imagination.
To those that bleed quietly.
To those that scream quietly.
To those that squeeze hope metaphorically.
Crush into this earth
slip into a beacon of love
flower pain and create resolve
our faces will burn in this atmosphere
we will scream out of existence
all while sustaining a vibration of pure beauty.
to really kiss someone, is to give up your entire soul.
Where did i leave my self respect?
When did i start splicing pieces of my heart into small dividends?
I can feel myself dying;  pulse checking,
i want to make sure i can still hear the kid in me crying.

What if the rocks i un-face hide no answers?
Instead all the faces i awake bring all sorts of new disasters?
And the bricks (thoughts) that are weaved inside my head.
Are corruptions built to jade me dead.

And those floating heads that  scream & bite.
Are all false anyway,
So i bid you all  Goodnight!!
You lay in my bed,
In harmony.
Your eyes are glowing,
In harmony.
Now that you're here I don't know how to live,
In harmony.
Your name warmly leaves my lips,
In harmony.
Explosive, explosive laughter.  
Tender ocean
Come drown me
I can't hold out much too long.
This feeling,
Is a whisper crawling out me.
An echo made by a stranger underneath my skin.
A tiny yearning that bubbles up,
as  a set of continuous chortles.
My heart beats,
and I give into phantasm.

The Crimson sun that never sets,
The moon that bathes and overthrows us with all of its beauty.
The ocean breeze and it's cool attempt,
The delicate,
goddess silhouette.
I find Madness to be much like a mental resin.
A volatile sickness, that sits on the cusp of belligerence.  
such vehemence merits the title of an artist.
The beast in its own way stands for a peculiar beauty.
Spinning its spokes,
i have seen an author at play, combing the labs of creativity,
seeking solace, and reason in this sort misadventure.

kicking my feet back & forth in the water
i wonder
Observing such cartoon characteristics,
should this traveler of realms be judged by a moral higher-arch?
Should it not be allowed to play its lute?
As long as no pain and suffering is wrought on our fellow beings?

Bringer of ideas, bound by no line of chalk.
the hurt that troubles you, will sadly be forgot.
in the arms of a fool, society stinks like a public pool.
So carry on your freedom, without care of any those whose only job is to inevitably drool.
Small prayers muttered in discreet whispers,
are softly spoken inquietudes said in reverse.
It's the Cynic, the pathological saint
sliding into my thoughts.
come anew and ready to live again.
my mind lacks any real estate to be reminded of any  once past reflection.
memory has failed me,
and thorns have surrounded me.
And here is where i've found myself.

sunken, defeated by nihilism
left alone with a beacon
a new friend,
with a new tune
whistling attraction.
packaging fight,
telling stories of grandeur
saying bloom,
like a flower, bloom
like two lovers roosting in on each others noses;
celebrate the end of a road
and the beginning of a new one.
I found you,
In a cavernous room holding onto a single ember.
You were small white and so delicate, Lost in the dark.
An unwanted man, left to drink a vile concoction.
One of duplicitous bitterness and maniacal laughter.
Those were days without pause,  
All in an attempt to effect a wordless reconciliation.

Take a knee,
You hold on,
And breathe.
You can dream in color now
Your guise,
chiseled of sprit
Will endure.
Your love,
Will replenish.
Blood in our veins
Everything is thick
Like a rain drop gently falling into the ear
Soft and strange in mass
Beautiful, and valiantly sly
It's a cringing of the soul
A bawling of the heart
A necessary infringement
With my palms I run my soul
Deep into your lips
Remember this pedaling ghost?
The one that still loves you?

Everyone knocks
Most times with confusion
Elusive goats

Radio in, and call your thermometer
True forgiveness is a place unstitched
Endearment is a soulless palace  
Like a white painted cornea  

A phrase sometimes catches fire in the twighlight
Sparking madness
Spinning circles
What a drunk.

Slipping on his bathroom floor
Babbling nursery rhymes
Crying, crying, crying.
why don't tall dark trees read to us anymore?

Oh that's right, we won't stop skinning them.
We like it
when they scream.
When they bleed
When they nudge themselves over from exhaust-full pain.

What a sore
What a ******* fairy tale
What a joke.
It's a center dream
Loose faces
Pasting the ones I want
I'm haunting myself
Not allowing  sleep to grab me  

A false beginning, ending with a middle. A nightmare now, transformed. I shake myself and try to suffocate myself. I remember I can't hate myself.

The pain leads me back to my grave
I've gotten used to a bed of roses
Should of known this.

But what  do I know?
Oh yeah how to pray
And how to eat
And how to love.

Can't stop asking
Whether this can be or not.
And when I do ask
I get happy and angry
Sad and lonely
Drunk and stupid
Somethings are forever.
Like a last goodbye, swelling into a deep lullaby.
Or like new beginnings under a reign of tiny kisses.

Eyes illuminated,
Heart incinerated,
Mind foliated,
Soul encapsulated.

My emotions  are a crutch,
My will, feels like it doesn't weigh much.
Death bed.
Flat line
Passion reborn.
Beautiful things don’t ask for attention.
ineffable contours, that cannot be tamed with a wordy depiction.
Like water running through my fingers,
Ephemeral, and leaving me to linger.
Caldera, my steaming  desire.
Instantiates a spy, that is ready to be set on fire.

Daughter of eve,
Carousel of dreams
You’ve drowned my angels
And left me  to die in a reverie.
This space is tender.
Every inch, a ubiquitous sense of peace.
A gift, found under a bedrock of a beautiful smile.
A gift left over by the warmth of your hands.
I'll always remember the little things.
The steady acquiescing sound of your voice rippling through my spine during a midnight conference.
The simple, but warm vibrations of your childlike laughter.
Your nervous eyes seeking cover from my gaze.
Here's a list of my demands.
Here's a list of my emotions.
Finally, sanctuary under your soft lips.
The truth is there is no center
no alignment of spirit & body
just a vehicle  full of bubbles(thoughts).
Apologies in advance
a bubble pops and with it our sense of free will.

we Carry us
through disappointment
we Carry us
through the frigid harbors of loneliness
we Carry us
and find the strength to bury the depression that amassed over this past winter solstice

oh my heart, heavy as a stone
there it goes, bleeding all alone
i hold it up high
if today will be the day i die
that i won't

As a master of my own domain
the fire in my gut burns heavy with flames

We Carry us
With the love of life, buried deep inside of us.
My earth, my ears, my face, my tears
my lies, my thoughts,
your eyes, your touch

Her soul, his smile, her lips, for miles.
his curiosity, her modesty
both honestly,
one another, mindfully.
Afraid, and restless.
Cold as a stone, looking for courage underneath a facsimile.
Blind and tortured,
A feeling so ineffable,
A courage so paradoxical.

With a sliver of hope I stumble forward.
Emotions, damp and turgid.
The mournful yappings of weakness.
The good ol’ potent self doubt.

Young girl, violins,
White horses run.
A rune with your name on it,
Living at the bottom of a wishing well.
Give me your eyes
don't be afraid
crucial happenings
deserved to be seen through

Give me your hands
we suffer we cry
we are as we do

Give me your shoulder
all the difficulties
are broodingly beautiful
all the new  stitches
are earned places of strength

every narrow hallway, every new expanse
every orange lit sky way
is a spring that’ll last forever.

live in focus
and save yourself
Your name,
a trap set under a pile of leaves.

Your words,
a sweet decoction of rythmic phrases
a cozy hug over the coolness of a damp night
An indelible kiss on the cheek

Your smile,
a rush of wind never to be contained
a complete stillness of  life
an invocation of instant gratitude
a parade of contentment,
melting my heart

eyes burn
fingers shake
the end of the world
is lit in a red hue
soft silhouette.
an outline so evocative.  
a strange desire to sing the unwise,
to catch a name and raise a fist,
to bare a few words,
and claim this evening,
from an otherwise drunken mood.

habitual courage summoned at the sweat of another drink,
a committee of stoic voices living inside of me.
passed down through a millennia of spanish men
incessantly clamouring for more whiskey.
incessantly advising
to just breathe and let go.
an index pressed on my lips  
the air rank with cherries
spits of rain, and thunder afar
my breath at a minimum
and this love is already augured w/ scars

Under a twilight glow
Cole's incantations
ease my disquietude
her voice an effervescent hymn
lulling the snakes that reside within my soul

what paradise
to lose
under my nose

She questions the validity of her arrangement  
cards dealt by "life"
she questions me
she questions the intent
she questions tonights heavy glow.
He'll **** you with a smile
Warm you with a laugh
And take you up on a drink.
Mr wizard, inventor of light.  
Bless us  with your sparkled teeth.
Let it be known that all nuances from your decrepit attitude are morphing us into herds of sheep.
Stop it.
You're hurting all of us.  
No one here came to see you bellow your heart out.
End of story.
I've been laying here forever Drowning In a sphere
I can't remember the last time I shut the door.
Where did all this dust come from?
My eyes are heavy again
I can make out a few shadows
I need solace from the gods.
Perhaps a knife so I could pierce my way out of reality
I'm traveling on a cloud,  
panning my body into submission
Strangled, I need to light a candle.
My hallways are flooded.
My pools leads straight into the earths crust.
I have a reindeer, his name?
Keeper of perspective, keeper of my most tender emotions
I sink into  myself, understanding the functionalities of this metaphorical thing I have created.  
A God in the realm of my subconscious
Magnus, I hope this temple will hold.
Magnus, someday I'll **** you.
Bare shoulder,
Kingdom of giggles.
my love grows nobler,
with each caressing nibble.

Coalescing, subterranean dimensions.
Expressing, my loving ascension.

Lips of affection,
my heart is stuck in a parallelogram of contention.
lost in reverie, no hope left for me.
On the ground dead
Half buried, arm sticking out
Abandoned and left with a lily
A ceremony long finished
People just passing through
A sequence of prayers
Long dried up and floating into the ether

Winters almost gone
Duplicity is just about melted
The sun is helping the rot
And what's left of the body
Is bordering near dust
My longest moonlight, pack your things and leave.
All my memories have been shoved into an evanescent dream.
So fly on like a zephyr,
fly on please.

The moxie, the eccentricities,
the lovely retreats.
The embraces, the symphonies,
Take it all,  please.

canvas sky, full of love.
may my body morph into a dove.
i need peace, i need steel.
i need to  rid of all the feels.
When all is said & proved.
& those close, are quick to run.
Clarity will beckon lose,
&  sink like kingdom-come.

Tendrils of peace
Fiery rings of freedom
This onus is making me prune,
& i have lost myself in a reflective arboretum.

The anthesis is the self, humiliating disaster.
Argumentations are made in the night to keep away all those laughing *******.
sins are sins are sins are sins are sins are sins
failure creeps aboard,  and  my patience folds thin.
Delayed consequence
Transmitted authority
You play the hand that reaches
The enthusiastic oiled machine
Begging for my blood.
I need my filling it says
Productivity is in demand it says.
My love knows no boundaries it says
I am worm stuck between dementia and cognitive reasoning
My emotions win every time.
I like that
I can feel everything.
That makes me feel beautiful.
Supreme and rich within the skin I live in.
Dear Azi, I'm full of broken thoughts.
My insides are like a box of matches.
The moisture from my sorrow, wont allow combustion.

I get up every morning with a tourniquet in my hand,
seeking the self in the vestibule of my childhood.
Your caveats no longer reach me.
But, the sweet carousel of your laughter still does.

Each loss is a new vulnerability.
A subscript, for a long past bludgeon.
The only whisper that still holds,
is the one that tells of your past love for me.
In the night I am joined.
A drink summons a row of faces,
unrecognizable they come to me as penumbras.
A swirl of half crescent grins and grimaces cry out in pain.
I am ****** into a hole of submission,
here are all the allegorical creations living inside of me.
These things stand tall, bare and judging.
Laughing and watching as I fall into a bottomless grip called “inevitability".
Breathing raw, dank ideologies.
Manifesting nasty, stubborn idiosyncrasies.  
I am freed by another drink
And the pleasant reality
that sometimes moving on
means laughter.
I come in fear
disrupted and clumsy
Shy, Shaken and awoken
My hands are cold, and feel like sabers
Indomitable spirit
Hospitable creature
Deranged child
Ego maniac
Freckle yourself alive
The hurt you sold, the hands you left.  
My body feels cold, my mind's a mess.
I can feel the earth, I can feel the wind
So I know, I'll crawl out from within.
I've had enough of my stomach,
I've had enough of my breath.
I'll sink my feet into the soil and burn on without any regrets.
I'm missing the innocence, i'm missing your fingertips.
But most of all I'm missing your  soft countenance.
First I heard knocking
I felt a displacement in myself
Nothing mattered but the alarms wailing inside me
I had to cry
I had to
Idiot child I unearthed you to bring light about thee
We are both the same ******* person
We are of the same vine.
You sold me on your breathing

The truth lingers, worse its rotten
Crawling all over my bedroom, it  insists I won't ever be forgotten
Oh but with an army of you living inside me, I don't see a reason to fade out
Belligerent monster, hone in on my thoughts.
I love you, but I am ridding myself of this nebulous distortion.
Transference is inevitable.
A flower that grows in between the dead cold moss.
A small hope cradled as a warm stone.
A kindness born through some invocation,
some attempt to make sense of our place in this world.
Its a prayer, a distance seen in your eyes,
A doubt formed in the mind,
by the brief rejection of a potential lover.

We are the esculent,
made ready to be consumed by the love of another.
We are a breath, held on by the hands of a good friend.
A flame stoked,
Gently in the night.
We are, we are,
weight (significant).
What if we could see each other's souls instead of each other's faces.
Maybe we'd find that our minds are all in the wrong places.
Our eyes are rigid, and usually unkind.  
While our hearts are vivid, and can produce love until the  end of time.
Supreme human,
I Awake this light.
Massless entity
Let us intertwine.
Climbing inside is ritual.
I build myself in this place
discussions are curated,
decisions are made and I  connect all the veins.

I invite all my wolves (emotions) inside,
and make pelts out of them.
Gloriously i let them cover my body,
It is then that I become the supreme oppressor.
A GOD dressed in thicker skin,
making whole hearted claims to peace and sovereignty.

In Victory I am made cold,
perverted, I am quick to lose sight.
the path back breaks me anew
And my predilection for all things soothed,
Makes me  climb back
Into the crucible I crawl
Seeking a better man.
Inside everyone of us exists a chorus.
A picture-present, set of voices.
In this abstract, I find thought  & reality
to be a singular unit.

Each conglomerate sings of a present desire/want.
We are made gods in this place, bounded of course by the limitations of our own imagination.  

Some thoughts are wicked, some thoughts are pleasant.
Some thoughts must be simply kept wholesome, to keep the world from our essence.

Sadly, i find that nothing i conjure is 100% my own.
Each spin of the web is a subset creation of some else's ideas, someone else problems.  In this i find that free will of course is also evaporated.
i the author stands on the shoulder of another.
in this realization i am set free.
Her fingers have sunk in
Leaving traces
Metal clanks, a hard surface
Man it's cold

Super imposed soul you cannot live here
Please no aroused dancing in the halls

Pick those chimos out of your nose already
Rally up the men it's time to tie up the noose
Everyone is strapped up, but lost within
This sacrifice deserves a whole afternoon
What did you say was on the tube tonight?
My eyes are closed.
I'm now part of a hatchery
It's dark in here
Oblivion is less than an inch away
My eyes open
Ambition co-exists inside these gusts shaking me awake.
You've  got to be kidding,
I didn't even get to choose.
I would've  been a waterfall,
Or an eclipse
Now I'm  being pulled inside another ridiculous idea.
I start sinking, I feel frightened
What madness.
Surrendered to shame
Left alone , to dwell inside a rhombus.
All my pain before me, a pejorative eye hollowing me into state of neurotic confusion.
In solitude, self reflection means a house of mirrors.
The air is heavy with whispers.
What is this cage?
My hands are wrapped around my knees. Why is it raining in here?
A sea of *****, having a laugh over tea.
I'm frighten, worried I'll be forgotten here.
Someone serves me a tall glass of milk, and I awake.
Sometimes when I rise out of the nebulosity of my ego, I can see  dead leaves on the ground.
Above I feel formless, Uncrippled by any  precursing contingencies.
Disturbances are nullified by the rising and falling of my breath.
I am no longer a keeper of anything.
I feel as I've been left to float inside a vacuum that requires the complete disassociation from anything that I have ever known.
Everything here is gentle, && welcomed.
vibrant and healing.
perplexing to those that aren't ready to let go, salvation for the many who are.
Give it sometime
our minds work in patterns.
worry is a house full of thieves,
Step outside of it and you'll be made able to breathe.

Give it some time
Negative creep is a curable disease.
A faction that misrepresents  a conquerable aberration.
wait for my signal, here have some chamomile tea.

Give it some time
i pray you'll be able to sleep
darkness is approaching, and you should know
i'm here for you for whenever
your wounds start to bleed.
Grab hold of the night,
Slip in through her curtains.
Sink in your teeth & bite,
nothing must feel uncertain.

Holding my breath,
I'm seeking passage out of here.
Eyes & memories,
body & soul,
Boundless energy fills my lungs,
& assuages me whole.
Small kisses of love,
are my only tokens.
I shudder and think,
of what's finally awoken.

Hands are tied,
future is set.
I am a rider,
observing a unruly death.
She's always misplacing.
Feeling for new incongrunces
I try to be pragmatic, & feel for her supple fingers.
These are the parameters of an injured human being.
A prosaic heart, A tenuous mind.  
I have fallen into the pit of her idiosyncrasies.
A man on a mission seeking to breathe & expand my spirit into her lungs.
Her nature corrupts my own,
And like a troglodyte,  I disperse my emotions into a prism.
A prism that is now full of turmoil & suspicion.
Oh wonderful, wonderful you..
Your actions are violent,
A misrepresentation of character.
Wounded light, you have a friend in me.
I don't believe you're worthless

In fact, your happiness is my own.
A signature, I still very much enjoy.
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