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Alex Nov 2013
northern skies
and the colorful atmosphere
I lay down on the grass
with no one beside me.

you slammed the door at me,
you left me away
coming back,
asking for my trust again.

and we were the same,
but we were different people.
different places and different bodies.
in these mass of stars, you were the one twinkling
while I was there, dead and not shining.

the constellations forming you and me
but the future didn't make it possible.
in those constellations were nothing but fake
but anyway they believed your undying love for me
as a sweet peck of taste.

I remember you saying  there was no us
but I believe the constellations
were forming both of us right.
I had to make it work, I was the only one working
and now I'm close to giving up
and just agree with every word that comes out of your mouth.

"It's gonna be okay." I repeated all over my head.
but this times infinity,
I was tired of myself trying.

what you get for trying
isn't a jackpot prize above your head
instead you find yourself  
giving up on love and giving up on you, on your own self.

I look back at the stars
and no one comes to lay down with me
and you know what's funny, though?
after everything we've done,
I still come back to these stars.
and oh do they remind me so much of us.
Alex Nov 2013
a baggage to carry,
a sadness to hide
the disgrace to people
hides in agony and strives.

in that box of sunlight,
she dwells and she cries
as her future was not
as bright as it was.

the door she came in
was full of regret and remorse
she wants her life
the same as it was before.

"you shot me so hard
and you stopped the pain in my heart.
I drowned the pills
as I fled out of life."


and now she was gone
and no one seemed to notice
and she guessed this is life,
this life of faded ashes
is nothing worth surviving
because it's just filled with broken glasses.
Wrote this in between classes. I just wanted to let out my emotions by writing poetry. School and the people in it are such imbeciles and because of them, for the past few weeks I've been getting more attached to poetry and I've been writing these kind of things. Oh, how I wish things change and all of this would end already.
Alex Oct 2013
"if you jump, i jump. i will never leave you behind."*
he says.  
those words were the last few words he told me.
and i'm here, saying sorry.

dear you,
i'm sorry for not jumping with you.
i was supposed to
and i didn't stop you.
i swear it was nothing intentional,
i loved you with all my heart,
and i will never forget you.

but that's the thing,
you came in first
and i was supposed to, second.
but i didn't.
because i was scared.
scared of falling
without you

you let go of my hand
as you fell from the ledge
of a rooftop of a small town.
a small town with the dark night gazing on top,
and the stars twinkling above.
i watched you fall
with my own eyes
as tears form around them
i regret everything.

"how could i find someone like you, now that you're gone?"
i say.

rain splattered down my hair
as i look down the pale body down the streets below
people were looking up
and i vanished away.
i didn't jump.

no, i didn't save you.
i didn't stop you.
i was there with my own eyes,
looking at you fall.
and i didn't do anything,
and i was blamed for everything.

you know i will always love you.
you know i should have stopped you.
i will never forget you,
and remember, i will always be there for you.
Alex Oct 2013
waking up in the shadow days of the endless tragedies,
the sun shining brightly beside me.
a mother who disowns her daughter,
and a bunch of profanities towards each other.

a family that has multiple problems,
cannot be solved for a father leaving.
here i am with the blame of everything,
and the friends with no clue as we smile together.

being a rebel, that's who i am
my mom hates me more
and she disowns me as well.
one more strike,
and i'll be out of this place
where the devils are drowning me
down to hell.

you know i always loved you,
but it's time for me to leave.
i'm really tired of everything
that's been putting against me.
when it's not entirely my fault
in this endless tragedy.
Alex Oct 2013
the words 'you will forever stay in our hearts'
are like tattoos written on our bodies.
we are promised to our loved ones
to never forget them
as we move on without their hobbies.

but we do,
yes, we do.
we forget them as if they were just a piece of paper,
and break that promise as if it were a broken finger.

why make promises,
when in the end, the ocean will wash them away?
why trust people,
when in the end, they'll throw you along the way?

that's the point of tinted promises.
and my promise was to live on with life.
but with the people in it,
i'm starting to get tired
of chasing cars that are not worth running for
because once they open that car door,
they'll hurt you again once more.

— The End —