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Al M Rakun Jul 2012
I lie on this earth, center of the universe.
These emotions run deep, and follow like a curse.
The most real things we cannot see,
While thoughts are driven to insanity.
My mind goes around and come back again.
I go through this life just playing pretend.
I feel I'm the shadow to myself at times.
In lies I seek out truth, I deny the worlds signs.

Hidden in illusions, what's real seems so distant.
Like how the clouds cloak the stars, far in the distance.
Although if you look hard enough, you can see them there.
And then just for a moment I haven't a care.

Sometimes late at night, the moons all I can see.

I feel peace around, feel the sky saving me.

I keep in mind, it's quiet as it'll ever be.

All while the universe, is sending epiphanies
Al M Rakun Jul 2012
Breathe in, breathe out.
For there's no one around.
Run faster they say, but it's never fast enough.
Living day to day, yet it feels I'm in a rush.

I pick one foot up, though there's always one on the ground.
Don't look weak act tough, for what you don't have you must scrounge.

Breathe in, breath out. They're watching you now.
Find somewhere quiet, and stay far from the noise.
Internal riots, wounded up like a toy.

Finally I'm alone, wind chimes in the distance.
No need to condone, reject all assistance.
Breathe in, breathe out. The purest of sounds.

Footsteps grow nearer, they begin to match my own.
I am the judger, for what you reap has been sewn.
Al M Rakun Feb 2012
My insides have the best of me, the empty can be so heavy.
The beginning starts and leads, from and to nothing.
Anchors on my chest, and I can't feel my heart.
Nothing is around me, yet nothing is where it starts.

Vision alone won't make me see, what's lying in front of me.
Thoughts alone won't help me believe, what could and should come to be.
I burn questions in my head, like cigarrettes on my hand.
What is it that I fear? Middle of the ocean with no signs of land.

Pull me through the clouds, I wanna see how rain is made.
Then drop me back to earth, I wanna feel this endless rain.
But that isn't what I feel, retreat back to nothing.
When my pride is hurt and I feel that certain something.

I hate the way I am, leave before you're left.
Read the first page, then never read the rest.
Over think your thoughts, ignore any feelings.
Avoid pain at all costs, no such thing as healing.

All the drugs in the world couldn't **** who I am.
And nothing could stop my pretending to not give a ****.
I'll admit my fears rule me, they have me by the throat.
But one day i'll snare them, send the pain below.

I don't keep faith in the idea, now or never.
But times my worst enemy, I know the sooner the better.
The wind waves the oceans, and nothing makes the winds.
So without question we all feel nothing, and nothing is my friend.

This is where it begins and that is where it ends.
This is where it comes and that is where it sends.
It's true I can be heartless, when I can't find my heart.
It's hard to constantly travel, when it wanders off so far.
And I can be so selfish, when I don't know my self.
But change never changes, so this me can go to hell.

We all die more than once in a lifetime.
Blow away my image, it's in the palm of your hands.
Must there be an ending to this timeline?
Wolves will be vicious, when defending their lands.

I build walls of steel, when I begin to feel vulnerable.
So I can be independent, it's anything but honorable.
"It's better to have loved and lost, then never to have loved at all."
Life doesn't run by a coin toss, can't just sit back and watch it fall.

It's ironic how silence, on the contrary, is the loudest thing in the world.
And how a tough facade, can shield such a weak, and tired insecure little girl.
Al M Rakun Jul 2012
Sail away through the oceans, fly from the trees.
Walk till your path leads to nowhere but here.
Don't pick every flower that tempts by your feet,
Or have all the scenery become the seer.
June ripens to July, and bears fruit near the fall.
While the wise become wiser, sharing what they saw,
So listen with your eyes; watch where the words go.
Repeat what you've learned and what's already known.
Bad things will happen and sad things will come,
To prevail is unknown and what's done will be done.
All the ashes have withered, from what once roared with fire.
Collect all the peace with a healing desire.
A question and an answer , is there much of a difference?
We take all that seems true along with what nonsense.
If people are who they say then they can be anything.
A distant lie, far away bells softly jingling.
Al M Rakun Jul 2012
The feelings I had can't stop me now.
Every word you ever said can't show me how.
Can you believe in trust or trust in belief?
Even the dullest knife can cause me to bleed.
Terror strikes my chest, such an emptying blow.
Terror strikes my chest, such an emptying blow.
Never ending pits, of the darkest of holes.
I'll claw them out, with my bare shaking hands.
Put the dirt in a pile and build new lands.
Give me a seed and I'll plant right on you.
And make sure that it grows to the top of the moon.
Now I can't see you, can't feel all this pain.
Except the constant reminder of leaving in vain.
Al M Rakun Feb 2012
I lay here still while my mind runs away, my dearest sanity don't leave me atray.
I think about the fabrics of space in time, as well as the reasons I'm making this rhyme.
These people and their lives so entwined in the rush,
don't they ponder past the stars even the heavens above?
Or even realize we're all here for a reason, that every happening is right with each season.
I wonder do they know nothing is as it seems, we could merely be Gods' long lasting dreams.
For in the scheme of eternity time does not exist. Are you starting to see my brains basic gist?

     There's an endless abundance of theories of mine.
Like in everyones subconscience we're telepathically inclined.
Out of the observed and the observer, I'm the observer.
I figure out humanity, now let's go a step further.

      Hear my words with passion though I am not that old.
The great philosophers started somewhere, this you know.
Call them practical or wise or whatever you may,
but i'll tell your right now it curiousity.
I search long and hard for knowledge, to much of your dismay.
You must keep all within thy brain, or you shall be seen as insane.

Crazy, crazy, insane my friend
Al M Rakun Feb 2012
I want to feel your depth, but my feet walk shallow in your waters.
I want to walk your earth, but these stones beneath get much hotter.
I want to drift your winds, take me far I don't want to remember this place.
I want to take your pain, I see it I know you see through this soul-less face.

      My mind is now your territory and you won't let me in.
So I sit and contemplate the reasons you did me in.
I'm twisted as I'll ever be behind this soul-less face.
Why don't we just close the distance and we'll begin this race.

       I never knew, that you could get this close to me.
I can't deny, the life that you make me see.
I should've known, the sun would never shine for me.
You take the light, from my soul-less face.

     At first you said you'd never leave me till the very end.
Well open up your eyes and see that you were wrong again.
These autumn leaves fall like my need to see your soul-less face.
I know I'm lying to myself but this is all a waste.
              
soul-less face, soul-less face
Al M Rakun Feb 2012
I filled the ocean with fire,
I froze these blowing winds with one touch.
I walk along this fiery tide,
this icy breeze is not enough.

I followed the smoke and danced,
beneath these ashes though I can't..

Release this guilt from me,
It could fill the seven seas.

I followed the smoke,
and it followed me.

I danced with the ashes,
and they danced in me.

— The End —