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aisha Sep 14
they named her Isabel

when she was born
there was a thunderstorm
outside her hospital room
her mother looked into her eyes
and saw the abyss staring back at her

she tried to keep Isabel in her womb
long enough to pass the date but
she could not stand
the pain in her brain
flames that could not be tamed

Isabel was chained
under the stairs
an ascent of nightmares and broken prayers
insinuating despairs of soldiers and heartbreakers

Isabel was her mother's thirteenth child
born on the thirteenth day, a Friday
she had nothing, only broken mirrors
jagged sides that cut through her fingers
every time she picked them up to look at her reflections
she too saw the darkness in her irises

they called her by her other name
for when she walked her feet did not touch the floor
people believed in her but she was never adored
she locked herself in a wooden coffin
only coming out of her hiding to the knocking
of two

I saw Isabel that night
when I was on the verge of collapsing
she had a black cat in her arms
she was humming, swaying
to the flashes of the lightning

I said, 'Isabel, are you here to save me?
Are you here to be my saviour?'
she laughed

they named her Isabel
for she is the devil wearing pastel
with my soul in her fists, with a crooked smile
she whispered
'If I'm your salvation, welcome to hell'
13.09.2019 - Friday
aisha Aug 30
all of the things you said
all of the things you did
no longer tug at my heart
or weighing it down

that was when I know
I have healed from all of your
bullet wounds
  Aug 27 aisha
You held the paper
between you lips
and inhaled

I've never
Been so jealous
Of a cigarette
It should have been me
aisha Aug 22
you have red flags around you
and I do not want to wear rose coloured glasses anymore
aisha Jul 17
the sky weeps
before me
with me
after me

for the earth
is my soul
and the rain my tears
a grey day calls for a poem about grief
aisha Jul 6
you with your hair parted down the middle
keeping boys in your cradle
carrying toxic spirits of the people
you cuddle on your shoulders
bit by bit
they split into acid
and gather at your feet
you couldn't fly no more

I took a blade to my wings
and tied it up on your back with strings
I spun from my dreams

I jumped the gun for you

bearing the gift I received
from my mother's womb
for us to build a tomb
so you could bury
the weight of mess you carry
on your fingertips

but you
you possessed my feathers and painted them black
smearing curse words, front and back
making my scream your soundtrack
of life, saying
nothing is going to hurt you, baby
but I will
because your naivety
is my cigarettes after ***

your new favourite thing
is to stomp on my heart
and lighting it in flames using the lighter
you burned your cigarettes earlier
making a bonfire, sitting around with that new lover
you told me was dangerous
because I had him first

the audacity

and to think that I considered you
my best friend, my godsend
all the time we spent collecting strength
has come to an end

so now, for my own sake
because I know you didn't care
I cut you off
and then I cut my hair
for those who had to live with betrayal for a while. this is where you and the situation part ways.
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