savs 5d

You don't know this yet,
but I'm gonna meet you
in a few days
and on the 13th of December
you'll let me be yours

My mother will hate you
for a couple of years,
but I'll leave the house
i grew up on
just to be next to you;
all the hard work and sleepless nights
will be worthwhile

Sixty months after that,
we're going to get married
on the 18th of June,
and our children will be happy,
i promise

I'm aware of all this stuff
because, twenty three years later,
I'm still in love with your laugh,
your jokes, your rants
and changing moods

I'll always be thankful
for that first conversation we had
eight thousand, three hundred
and seventy seven
days ago

-savs

savs Jun 12

What the hell is wrong with me?

I don't want to care,
I don't wanna feel like this anymore

I can't ask for your help
because i would have
to explain myself,
and that would make it
ten times worse

I should just stop speaking to you,
but you did nothing to hurt me;
I'm stupid and i overreact
because I'm insecure
and, on my mind,
there's no place for me
in your heart

But what if,
maybe,
I'm not wrong at all?

-savs

savs Jun 2

I should not be allowed
to have feelings
because they make me suffer
from the moment i wake up
until i go to sleep at 2 a.m

i get sad when i text you
(you're too far away)
and i miss you
when you're not talking to me,
it physically hurts

i wanna cry every time
i see pictures of the two of us together,
and when my friends ask me
how am I doing in love
i don't know what to say

how am I supposed to explain
that when you tell me to
dream about you as a joke,
i actually do?

maybe (probably)
you're sweet because it is
in your nature,
it's just the way you treat your friends,
but every compliment
that comes out of your mouth
means a lot to me

i crave the attention
(only if it's from you),
it's not normal
(at least for me)

i cannot (refuse to)
accept that

savs Jun 2

Did you realize
how close we've got
in the past few days?
Because i did

And even though i hate it,
i never want to let you
grow apart

Whenever you say I'm pretty
or that you miss me,
i can't help
this presure i feel on my chest

I told you i needed you
to hold me in your arms
a week ago, last saturday,
yesterday
and twenty times after that

but, as i said,
i hate it

i hate the way
you make me smile
with a simple "hello",
because I'm scared
of the upcoming "goodbye",
you'll get tired of me
at some point

I don't wanna feel
the way i do,
only because I'm too afraid
of being rejected

I'm not fool enough
to think I'll be able
to forget you
or your hoodie,
but i can try

i have to,
if that's what it takes
to keep you in my life

-savs

savs May 11

When i saw you yesterday
and you said goodbye
something felt wrong

It seemed like you
Were leaving for a long time,
Like you would be gone forever

You didn't even try

Whispered "i love you"
Whilst holding me between your arms,
A tear running down your cheek

You were giving up,
you felt tired,
A human with no hope left

I wish you hadn't let go

— The End —