Afiqah 2h

I see them,
I see you all
but
unlike you,
they don’t smell like love
and they aren’t completely content
with such fire
where you and I,
both used to savor

-a.

Afiqah 2d

there is some sort of vulgarity
to what sits in
with my fears and anxieties
an unwelcoming addition to my body
and I swear I could feel them the most
whenever I try to reconnect
what is and what isn't
yet I still see my demons all dressed
in a gloriously titled guise
sometimes
I can't quite tell apart

-a.

Afiqah 4d

somewhere
between this darkness
still echoes and recognizes your soul
I can’t quite unfeel any of it
so I let my bones rest there
at the corners,
the ones
you always cleverly used to notice
how my unpretty flaws glow
right before you

-a.

Afiqah 5d

I come back,
I come back to those nights,
those nights that reeked heavy full
of sweaty hearts and poetry,
sweaty hearts and longing hands that
spreads an absolute warmth
only one could recognize
yet I still keep coming back and wonder,
“Is there ever a night that came
and the moon reminds you
of my flawed soul?"


-a.

Afiqah 5d

I know
I’ve seen enough,
I’ve felt enough
but sometimes,
I can never unlearned this ugly habit
of scratching myself out too wildly
and live with the irony of it all
that I’m just too good at weighing
these triggering parts
but never too good at unremembering
how and what made them all stay

-a.

Afiqah 5d

sometimes,
I fear for my own becoming
other times,
I just simply enjoy
sitting before my demons
as I wear my skin slightly thicker
just being
under their lamps
full of all their ugly reckonings

-a.

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