How many times
do I need
to break my heart
just to heal yours?

Happiness has its own hefty price you have to pay.
I paid mine with the one who held my heart.

And I still often ask if my happiness
is worth for the price I paid.

I see love with all those beautiful colors,
with colors brought by Dusk and Dawn,
with colors when the Sun kisses the sky as it rises
and the horizon, as it sets.

I see love with all those beautiful colors,
like how blue the sky is in a clear, bright day,
like how fresh the flowers and leaves are in early Spring.

Though there are times that love is dull and dark,
with colors that are grey and black,
like how the clouds become heavy in gloomy days,
love still remains to be beautiful.

For to be loved is beautiful.
And being loved by him will always be beautiful.

I love to see you fly freely
without the shackles that bind you to me
without the thin red string that connects us
without the belief that we're meant to be.

I love to see you fly freely
with all the love I can give
with all the wish I can whisper
with all the smile I offer for your dreams.

I want you to be free
Not looking back to what you'll leave behind.
Free from worries of what should have.
Free from worries of what should be.

Our parting was silent yet the pain it brought was loud.
The tears were behind the twinkling eyes and sweet smile.
The fear of letting go went along with holding your hands.
The prayer for you to stay laid within feeling the  warmth from your embrace.
Looking at you with a smile was how I kept my silence.
Then I drown myself with  your memories as I reminisce.

That's the thing about having a broken heart.
When the love you felt was true and pure,
it still hurts overtime.
No matter how long time has passed,
the scar is as painful as the wound.
It's a ticking time bomb.
When triggered, you burst to tears.
Crying all the questions and regrets you have over the years.
And sometimes all you can do is breathe in deep
as there are certain pain and tears you try so hard to keep.

I've come across people who were waiting most of their lives.
Waiting for better ways on how they could live
while others just chose to wither away and die.

There were those who waited too long for love to arrive.
But when it finally came, they were already too afraid
to take the leap and dive.

There were those who waited for the meaning of their existence.
But when the opportunity came to define who they were,
they decided to let go of that chance.

There were those waiting for freedom.
But when the shackles were loosen and finally removed,
they chained themselves back.
For they missed the prison, their pain.

And then I've come across myself
waiting for the sun to rise and shine after the dark.
But when I saw the sunlight in your eyes,
I let you go and turned away with a silent goodbye.

Memories are just like the stars above.
Some shine bright. Some lack luster.
Some feel so near. Some, cold and far.
Memories, like stars, give the feeling of nostalgia.
Reminiscing the moments as how they were, as how they are.
Memories, like stars, grace the thoughts at night.
One makes the eye tear and the other gives it light.
Memories recalled make the heart happy and blue.
Because at the end of those memories, there's always you.

I've been asking every time I fall asleep,
that when I close my eyes, will I still be in one's heart to keep?
When tomorrow comes and I won't be awake,
will there be someone who'll cry for my sake?
If at the middle of the day, I will suddenly fall,
is there anyone who'll answer my last cry and call?
When everything is done and in time, I'll be gone,
will you remember the moment when I was your beloved one?

Your radiance blinded my eyes
yet they didn't hurt.
Your words pierced my heart
yet I did not bleed.
Your fire set my soul ablaze
but I wasn't burned.
Your chains held me to the ground
but they made me soar higher.
This is the kind of love you give:
complex yet affable,
resilient yet comforting,
agonizing yet appealing.

People thought it only existed in fairy tales.
She found it cliché.
He brushed off the very thought of it.
But then it happened.
They happened.
We happened.
And we never expected it.

The Universe knew your love was right.
Yet, it's the same Universe that made the time wrong.

We both ask each other how we are, if we are okay, if we are fine.
We ask those standard questions to cover the ones we want to say. Until one of us slips and strips those words with their own facade.
We have moved on with our lives.
That's for sure.
But we haven't moved on from the feelings, have we?

I reached out unto your cage to release your shackles
but you closed your doors hurting my hands.
The pain is real and I am left confused.
All I ever wanted is for you to be free.
Yet you bowed your head in defeat
and retreated back into the shadows.
I'm not sure for whom my tears will be.
Do I let them fall for you?
Do I let them fall for me?
I've wounded myself and the scars are reminders of you.
I never thought holding on to you would be this painful.
I'm ready to take the fall with you
but you are full of what ifs and maybe.
So I guess I'll just let my tears fall for me.

I wished..
I asked..
I plead..
I prayed..
..for time.
..more time with you.

And the Sunset witnessed it.

Her heart ached for the sorrow she saw in his eyes.
She reached out her hand to him.
Yet he chose to drown himself alone in sadness.
She burdened her heart of pain for the both of them.
Hearts were broken. Tears were shed.
She cried for him while he cried for another.

I look at myself everyday
in the mirror and then realize
I've been given the most beautiful gift
I could ever ask for - my existence;
my chance of life;
my chance of love.

I was about to hold your hand
when you said goodbye but
you already started walking away
and all I had to look at was your
back as you go.

She was just
one of his once-upon-a-times
in reaching his happy ending.
But for her,
he's already the happily-ever-after.

You feasted yourself with
the beauty you saw in front of me.
The smiles, the laughter, and
the nonsense talks behind
those mischievous glances.
Yet you never cared to look
or even spare a glimpse
at the scars branded at my back.

He got lost along the way
abandoning what's left in his sanity.
He forgot himself while chasing
the dream that was not meant to be.
All he remembered was the warmth
of her name on his lips and the
feeling that came with it.
And that's how she saved him.

He held out his hand for her to hold
when she was afraid and unsure.
He comforted her worried heart
with the strength of his smile.
He saved the last of her will
with the warmth of his words.
And then with all the things he did for her,
he became the love she knew.

We tend to avoid things that can cause us pain.
If we are afraid to be wounded,
then why do we break hearts?

When I was a young girl, I loved to watch couples getting married and told myself that one day, I'll marry a man who can give me my dream wedding. Now that I'm all grown up, I still love to watch couples getting married but instead of wishing to marry someone who can give me my dream wedding, I'd love to get married to the man who knows my dreams and love me still no matter how simple or grand my wedding will be.

You are the promise
I'm willing to be
engaged with.

I am a collection of shattered,
broken glasses.
My sides and edges are sharp
and may cause a wound
to whoever dare to hold me in their hands.
You may think that only my large shards can hurt but the truth is,
it's the small ones that can create the most pain.

Despite these things, is your love still
willing to embrace my brokenness?