one single, solitary tear
it will always be alone
few drops may merge on its path
but the wind will separate all

and to what do we owe this
separation, this displeasure?
Pushiness, infatuation. Love.
Five days, and it's already gone?

When I was able to feel the pain
I went not to my mother.
My mother betrayed me.
Not my father,
My father left me.
I retreat to music.
I bury my scars and bruises in music notes.
I wait for that beat to drop,
In order to raise my heart back up.
This music numbs my pain.
I feel safe in my music,
Grab a pair of headphones before a gun
In a **** zombie apocalypse.
I am going to drown out the hurtful words,
In a tub full of lyrics.
Music,
Heres to you,
For saving my life,
More than anything ever should have to.
Safety,
If you’re lucky
Will be found.
But my safety is the drums
And the guitar.
A song for every occasion,
The rain even has a beat,
Drumming but no rhythm.

paragraphs
sentences
words

things that describe me
and my worth
and my meaning

one day perhaps i'll be told just what those
paragraphs
sentence
and words
are

but until then
i get the attention
i deserve.

please take me to a safe place
where everything is bright and shining
where it's never raining and dreary
where the water is pure and food is a delicacy
i want a safe place
where i'm never afraid of being myself
where i don't feel guilty for being happy
where i won't be forced to be unhappy
take me to a safe place
where my family isn't falling apart
where no one is a disappointed in me
where i'm not afraid of my best friend
just take me to a safe place
please.

"always have hope" they say.
"never lose hope" they tell me.
hope is supposedly a blessing.
it is the feather that is lifted effortlessly
the light of every person's life.
it's the purest form of human ignorance.
a wolf in sheep's clothing.

for that one moment i feel weightless.
i see my ideal world snap into focus.
everyone is smiling there. the sun is bright.
and you and i are standing hand in hand
neither of us with a care in the world.
why would we in such a serene place?
and then that moment ends.

there is nothing quite like a crumbling heart.
you wouldn't expect to physically feel it.
but an empty feeling grows in your chest.
the wind has been knocked out of you
along with any traces of hope.

i'm left with no hope and a broken heart
all because you said a name.
and it wasn't mine.

A time to start pondering new wishes
and how close you know you can get
to them before the hours chase you
back to the cot where you started

"I was happy, when sadness gently walked into the room and served me the most brutal slap that my feelings ever tasted."

KD || Sadness

I wish I could write again.
Like I used to when I was sad.
I'd write and it was beautiful and creative
Because the most sad things are the also the most creative.
But things have changed.
And I can no longer write.
Because I no longer feel sad.
I just feel nothing.