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 Sep 2017 Angel
Ambrelle
You look at me with your eyes bright
Said that we would never fight
Your words became lies
And my feelings died like flies

The world seemed to be held in your hands
Now it's held you the remaining strands of my heart
You now mean nothing to me
As if you would've ever dropped to one knee

You talked about our future
But what future
Talked about a house and children and dreams
I'm glad they won't happen
They won't have to deal with your hits

I remember your hits that came from your mouth and from your hand
The strands of marks across my skin
But I would never tell I was harmed

I will Never forgive you
But I will Never tell
Never tell about the harm.
Having Depression is like finding out that mermaids are real
It doesn’t make sense to you until you’re getting dragged to the bottom of the ocean
And then you think
Oh
That’s what this is
And I’m drowning now,
That’s just……… great
And eventually, with your last vestiges of breath left
You float back to the surface
And you’re fine.
And that’s it.
Mermaids stop existing again.
Because you never actually saw what grabbed you
You only felt the claws around your leg
The cold, clammy hands tugging
With a force that you could never fight against
But you never saw her
So it was all a dream
Right?
And it happens again and again
You are drowning again and again
Until the water begins to feel like home
And the only thing reminding you that you are alive
Is the burning in your lungs
And when everything you had balanced so very carefully starts falling
Off the shelves of your life
When your “mild” depression starts deciding it wants to be more
When being alone makes you feel dead inside
And when losing your cool for one ******* second makes you contemplate your own demise
When do you admit to yourself that you are slipping
You are sinking and just because you can slow your descent
Does not mean that you’re not still drowning
And at the end of the day just because it took you longer to get there this time
Doesn’t mean you aren’t still lying on the ocean floor
Devoid of light and sound
And if you had just climbed onto that now distant boat and sailed away
You’d be fine.
But climbing was too hard
And sinking is so much easier
And you’re scared that if you reach out
Your hands will feel clammy and cold
As they wrap around your friends throats
And drag them down with you
And you would rather rot at the bottom of an endless sea
Than let that happen
So you lie in darkness and wait
For a sound
The singular resounding sound
Of failure
And you slowly float back to the surface
Take a deep breath
And you’re fine.
Because mermaids aren’t real
It’s all in your head
This is normally performed aloud, but I wanted to share it with you all, as well
 Mar 2017 Angel
Marte Lindholm
After a long time
With sadness and crying,
Finally the sun started
To shine again

The songs went
From sad to happy
And so did the mood,
Thoughts and feelings

A new love,
A new hope.
I am afraid,
But curious as well

Finally things seem
To make sense again
And it is impossible
To see how this ever can end

But with the experience
Earlier made I know
That even the best
Can turn into the worst

Hey, let's enjoy it
When I still can
This can be different
This can be good
 Mar 2017 Angel
Pablo Neruda
Don't go far off, not even for a day, because --
because -- I don't know how to say it: a day is long
and I will be waiting for you, as in an empty station
when the trains are parked off somewhere else, asleep.

Don't leave me, even for an hour, because
then the little drops of anguish will all run together,
the smoke that roams looking for a home will drift
into me, choking my lost heart.

Oh, may your silhouette never dissolve on the beach;
may your eyelids never flutter into the empty distance.
Don't leave me for a second, my dearest,

because in that moment you'll have gone so far
I'll wander mazily over all the earth, asking,
Will you come back? Will you leave me here, dying?
A friend of mine asks,
“Why do you only ever write about romance lately?”

Well, the answer is quite simple, really. It is because I have tasted it.

I tasted it when my eyes first drank the light from his grace when he stood tall above me
His saturnine windows called out to me behind flesh curtains whenever he spoke, ever asking me to join him in his ecstasy
He, from a distance, darted towards me and pressed our sides together—letting myself melt in the velveteen touch of fabric skin
There was a shower of momentary light that night but only his radiance did I bask in.

I tasted it in the heart of the stone city where usurpers of old stood on polished stone
The Bulwark’s adobe reach embraced our reverie as memories from sleep stories become reality
He, in the confines of that venerable fortress, made me vulnerable for I was secure in his arms
His fingers are in between my own like woven mithril unbreakable lest he broke its bond himself
It is in this kingdom of carven stone and handmade walls that he sang of ardor with a dragon’s petrifying gaze.

I tasted it in yuletide storms where men and women waged war with happiness and grief
When the armies of pain and suffering fell at our clasped hands and cheeks red from amorous verve you said you were to journey home
But you did not let go of my grasp
With me you remained and in your arms I stayed
As the bitter winds of bigoted mouths blew, as the fire from damnation is declared by self-righteous souls, we stood fast in the storm.

I tasted it when he said our love he could no longer endure
There we sat, on a tarnished vehicle, as the last of our love gave into rust
What is frightening to me peeked from his saturnine eyes and he closed his curtains shut for the downpour of despondency was to come
We flooded our façades and the rivers quaked our emotional integrity
He held my hand for one final chance before we ripped our wrappings forever apart and he kissed me tender
Our lips made love—like the first they ever met in weathered heat—for the last time.

I tasted it when I told him “Just do so, when your appetite roars to love me again,” and until now I am waiting.

So, why do I ever only write about romance lately?

Well, the reason is quite complicated, really. But–but it is because I’ve tasted it.
For my muse, Emer. I ever hoping you'll find your way back to me.

Read more of my works on Tumblr: www.brixartanart.tumblr.com
 Mar 2017 Angel
Dhaara T
Here & Now
 Mar 2017 Angel
Dhaara T
I love this moment
where time has slowed down
Your fingers learn to take a flight
just micro-millimeters above the ground
And the earth, she quivers
when you are so close
Yet not, not yet...sinking into my skin
But I love this, how love flows
Your lips merely touch
my eyelids falling with the weight of diffidence
To my sigh, my warm breath falling on your neck
You smile as a consequence
I love this moment
The vibration of your voice
reverberates through your chest
as it invades my palm, as I silently rejoice
It flows through and meets the synchronicity
of my beating heart
Oh how my name gets new meaning
when it flows from your warm lips
still exuding the fragrance of love
I love how your gaze rips me apart
into mere bubbles in the universe
How your soul kneads into mine
And are we even you and I anymore?
I love how your existence echoes every time
How I fail to decipher which thoughts
belong to you and which are mine
Do I love you or do I love my reflection in you?
Or do I love the reflection of
your reflection in me,
that mirrors through you?
What substance is this love?
I know not, but I know I love this moment
I wish, though,
I could live this moment
even when I opened my eyes
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