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Apr 27 · 29
dear mom,
abby Apr 27
i remember when you stopped caring,
i was eight, naive, i needed somebody to care about me.
my dad wouldn’t do it and i thought you could.
i was so wrong. how could i be so wrong!?
you haven’t cared since. you pretend to care on birthdays and facebook but it’s all a facade. i guess i’m the only one that can see through it. i guess i’m the only one that’s seen the other side of you.
Apr 14 · 38
abby Apr 14
burden others is all i do,
and occasionally i get used.
i’m so tired of feeling this way,
i just need to be okay.
my heart aches for those around me,
i know they all wish i were gone.
happy is all i want to be,
well i wish life weren’t so long
Apr 14 · 26
hookup culture
abby Apr 14
you called me pretty,
but only when i was on my knees.
you said i was gorgeous,
but only when we were talking about birds & bees
you named me as a goddess,
but never when i was fully dressed.
i guess all you really wanted was ***.
Apr 14 · 140
abby Apr 14
“hey! are you okay?”
this is a conversation i have at least eight times a day,
“oh, i’m fine. just a little tired”
as if what i said could get any dryer.
Apr 14 · 28
abby Apr 14
i wonder if they realize that i haven’t felt this way in so long.
i wonder if they realize that i only have a soft spot for them.
maybe they do, they probably don’t realize.
they realize, they just don’t feel the same
Mar 7 · 269
abby Mar 7
i lash out at anyone deserving,
i love way too hard,
this illness is so unnerving,
and i feel like i’m breaking into shards,
i know i can’t handle this,
i know i won’t last much longer,
i’ll stay as long as i can if time permits,
i’ll try to make it farther.
Mar 7 · 48
his playlist
abby Mar 7
his playlist was by far my favorite,
now i can’t stand for it to be played,
i guess what i’m saying is savor it,
before you get betrayed
Mar 2 · 66
abby Mar 2
it’s clear that i’m not good enough
so why, tell me
do i even try?
Mar 1 · 868
abby Mar 1
i’m alone,
craving his touch,
his breath on his lips
his fingers between mine.
and i realize, at most, that is a wish,
not a possibility.
Mar 1 · 44
nothing to me
abby Mar 1
as i lay awake with my eyes open, i notice that i don’t love him, at most i love how he makes me feel. nothing more.
Mar 1 · 48
stubborn love
abby Mar 1
it’s not right but i have to accept it. it’s not true but i must accept the lies. i can’t change them.
Mar 1 · 263
abby Mar 1
i’m too much,
too much to handle,
and yet simultaneously,
i’m not enough
Jan 1 · 184
abby Jan 1
the way i adore you but am not allowed to,
the way i want to be with you but can’t,
i understand you’re not ready and now i have to accept that, it’s so hard, life is so hard, i can’t take this anymore. i want to die, i’m obsessing over death currently
Jan 1 · 49
abby Jan 1
at a party and nobody noticed i was gone
and then they wonder why my face is so long
i’m so tired of being this way
being ignored by everybody every day
i feel so left it and want to cry
this is making me want to die
Dec 2020 · 358
brb crying
abby Dec 2020
the tingles in your nose,
the burning in your eyes,
right before you cry
Dec 2020 · 44
abby Dec 2020
i wish i could stop caring, for my sake.
i wish i could stop hoping, for yours.
i wish i could fix you, and make you mine, all mine.
that'll never happen, i'm just dreaming.
abby Dec 2020
i care too much about the wrong things,
i care too little about the wrong things.
Dec 2020 · 46
this poem sucks
abby Dec 2020
sometimes i just say your name over and over to hear it again.
sometimes i like to mention you in conversations with my friends
just to think of you.
god i miss you
i miss you more than anything and anyone, i feel like we just have a very special connection.
im tired of longing for you,
tired of repeating your name
Dec 2020 · 59
abby Dec 2020
your smile was so sweet,
you laugh like a dream,
until i realized
it was just you & me.
Dec 2020 · 433
**** pt.2
abby Dec 2020
the cost of getting over you
is my life
Dec 2020 · 815
abby Dec 2020
it’s been so long
3 years maybe
since i’ve loved you
Nov 2020 · 69
life is hopeless.
abby Nov 2020
what is life? an obstacle? a game?
i believe that life is pointless. no hope here.
life is the repetition of the chaos and calm. no faith here.
life seems to always be a carbon-copy of the day before. i’m telling you, it’s always the s a m e. think about how many fights you’ve live through, and how many apologies. after nearly every fight there’s an apology. it’s routine. predictable. uniform.
life is hopeless, as i am. life is what you make it i suppose. for now, life is hopeless.
Nov 2020 · 251
abby Nov 2020
as i lay awake with my eyes open, i realize that i don’t love him. at most, i love how he makes me feel. he’s just another person to me, unimportant. he’s just another face, insignificant. he’s just another lie, eating away at my unhealthy conscience.

— The End —