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Joanne Russell Dec 2018
When I'm anywhere close to you,
I can't seem to figure out what to do
Cuz after years of keeping my emotions sealed
I dont know how to feel

So as you reach out your hand and arm,
One that's been abused and brought to harm,
I'm lost in what I want to do
Cuz I feel something so strongly for you

But I don't know what I'm feeling,
I don't know what emotion you've been unsealing
And I want to get close to you, but I'm lost,
I want to understand, but I fear the cost

I dont think I could live without you,
But I dont know if my emotions are true.
Why am I so mentally ******, that I can't just see
That I think I do want you to be with me
theres a guy I care for so much but idk wut I'm feeling and I dont want to hurt him in any way so I just hide from myself
Joanne Russell Nov 2018
Theres a quiet "tick tock"
In the chiming of a clock
That seems to drain your life away

But since your already dying
Theres no use trying
And this is probably your last day

The floor is stained maroon
I didn't expect it so soon
But now you lay there is decay

Your death was all too sad
And really quite bad
But I think I'll pass on the dismay
Joanne Russell Oct 2018
You think all is fine
then there’s a trigger
and you start to change,
and you go deeper

Deeper down
to a stifling air
where you can’t cope
and you’re filled with despair

A despair that eats you
from the inside
and you sit and waste away,
wishing you could have died

And as you wish for death
you sink to the ground
and wallow in your pain,
until you hear a sound

And with that sound
something in you switches back on
and fills you with hope
so you trudge on

And on you go, out of the dark
To see a little light shine,
and because of that
You think all is fine
Lots of us are constantly suffering, but no one else really knows how much.
Joanne Russell Oct 2018
People look at me all alone
And like to assume that I'm lonely
Yet they can't seem to see
That I'm not on my own,
Because I can talk to the monsters
under my bed
I can be friends with the voices
in my head
I can get along with the devil
who took my soul
And make room for the ghosts
who filled the hole
I can go play with the creatures
in the woods
Or talk to the man who gives me
my druggy goods,
And I can call all the demons by name
And we can all get together
And be alone with each other
Because we all like our solitary the same
I may seem lonely because I'm alone, but know that if I am "alone" then it means that I like it this way.
Joanne Russell Oct 2018
You don't have to accept me,
Nor understand this ****,
But please hear this last plea
And stop punishing me for it.

I can be who I want to be,
I don't need a permission or permit
But I still want to make you see,
And of your mistakes, admit.

For still now, you won't let me be,
And your single-mindedness won't quit,
And my pain, you won't see,
Because you still try to rid me of it.
This is something I wish I could get across to my parents, but they refuse to accept or even listen to me at all.
Joanne Russell Sep 2018
There is absolutely nothing to see here
Nothing at all, whatsoever
But please do appreciate this poem
Because as a filler of space, its rather clever
Nothing to see here.
Joanne Russell Sep 2018
Dear Criminal,
As you sat there before me, in prison chains
I couldn’t help but wonder if a while ago
Your circumscription and castigation would be quite the same
Because for now, no matter the caliber of deed been done
You end up in a somber place of confinement
Where we all keep getting locked up one by one
But at least be glad, dear malefactor, that it isn’t 1675
For back then and in your position
How do I put this… well, you wouldn’t be quite so alive
I wrote this for a class; I got a good grade.
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