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There is no such thing as the abyss
Static, white noise, information overload
Analysis paralysis
The mind shuts down, but never squanders its supply

I am worn thin
I am overwrought and jaded
Lackluster and swooning for the mist
Yet in the midst of everything, I feel amiss
I am the nothingness that lost its place within the confines of an empty concept
Labeled the ‘abyss’
It does not exist
It is overload and darkness
Stare forever and your brain will short circuit
but leave the lens behind
Retreat into your caves and sleep
And your long exposure will reveal light
Answers
Unlabeled, mysterious and so far out of reach

I am overwhelmed
Distant
A cacophony in deep space
Choking as I gasp for air
Dying, literally dying
To be heard

But I can’t cry anymore
I can’t speak like I used to
Can’t dream at all
I am the abyss
But I am not empty
You simply cannot see beyond yourself
To know what I hold within my depths
my lola died
and I'm so faraway

can't cry
can't scream
don't know why
numb, I seem

my lola died
and I'm so faraway

can't go home
even if I try
I'm not alone
I feel like it, why?

my lola died
and I'm so faraway
goodbye lola

Mask up my pain
Hold back my tears
I'm goin' insane
Nobody knows
All by myself
Let the rain hit me
I'm goin' insane, nobody knows - Russ
 Nov 2019 Lizzie Matthias
juno
What if I kissed you?

Aha just kidding that's gay.

Unless..
******' high
 Nov 2019 Lizzie Matthias
juno
Aye my mom let me out and I'm officially discharged.

Finally.

I'm gonna catch a flight to Finland now.


The gang's finally gonna be together again.
 Nov 2019 Lizzie Matthias
Alex
We stare at empty light
Look at fake pictures
Pretend that everything
Is just okay

We watch pointless videos
Mindless entertainment
To fill the endless void
The people have created

We don't know what to do with ourselves
To keep us occupied
We don't know what we like
We don't know how else to hide

The world is ending
People are dying
We are all stuck
In a fake world

Just zombies
Trying to cure ourselves
Of the terrifying void
Outside
 Nov 2019 Lizzie Matthias
alex
at midnight
my hair had been a tangled mess
pulled back in a bun

at one a.m.
it had been a wave atop my head
greasy but beautifully dramatic

at two a.m.
it had been a nuisance, oil at the roots
but i said i looked too pretty to take a shower
(that’s such a funny and sad reason)

at three a.m.
i got the idea to cut it
i said, “i need a change, talk me out of it”
and you tried; thank you for that
but even so

at four a.m.
i cut my hair

and i didn’t feel any different.
i cut my hair to feel something and i just feel the same. it’s like that, sometimes. at least it looks okay. no complaints.
for

    once,

   i would

love

      to be

         the poem

and

     not

         the poet
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