The burden, that heavy feeling came without a greeting. It was just here and not ready to succumb.
The towers of books and paper and the flashing technology were once part of a structure. The fixed structure that made me feel comfortable but was suddenly gone.
At first, it felt like something found its way inside my room and tore down everything it touched. The towers fell. There was no structure anymore.
But as time passed, I realized that the towers did not fall. No, the towers grew. They grew and took the space that I desperately needed. The walls that I always felt so comfortable in, that were a place of relaxation and were part of my structured daily life, turned to a space where I feel cornered and anxious. Never could I have imagined that a virus is capable of taking away space.
Just some thoughts about the situation while in quarantine. Normal things, normal rooms suddenly became my source of fear. A fear, a burden that I don’t want to experience again.
My fears are a reproduction of the battle.
The battle between my thoughts and my wishes.
Two fronts collide.
And all that remains is my broken self
Is it normal to not want to love?
It is - I said
It isn't - They said
Love is what I fear.
To put your heart in someone's hands.
Only to find it broken into pieces.
— The End —