im Mad, sad and can’t figure out why I keep thinking bout you ...
Is it the regret that’s eating me alive?
Or the silence of your solitude.
Is it the stinch of a relationship the died like 2 to 3 years ago?
Or this peanut butter sandwich that’s really not fulfilling me
It feels like I’ve been hit in the “testies”
I sold my soul when you told me I was in your dreams.
So I tried to fulfill your love with fantasies.
Imperfect being that was trying to be another angel..
Playing God is not easy when you have human angles..
You start to see that your loved one starts a new religion
Cause they think you’re not real to there vindication
Like right now you think I cheated with somebody else...
But that body was by me but it didn’t help.
To make it clear your perception was another step
And I already took a thousand when I walked out of hell
You threw me down and you threw away the ******* key
It’s kinda weird When you scream “Satan!” As my new name.
This is my shelter when I hide
All of my answers will arrive
Knock on the door please come inside
Cause I’ve been waiting so long for someone to lay by
take my sweater and my heart
Bring your sun where it’s dark
Tell me stories let me soak
If I’m sinking let me drown
Cause I’ve been waiting so dame long
For someone to truely love who I’ve become.
Saw my brother they put him on tv
Just another black man up on tv
Momma called and said
“why did they shoot him?!”
Now she walk threw the house like a loose end.
And I stare at a hole in the ceiling
Took 3 days and 3 lines now I’m peeling
Momma said she’ll be back but it’s been a month now.
It’s the silence that ate up her mind now
Since then I haven’t heard from her...
I’m still lock in this conscious thought with my brother.
Truth be told I hold my X and my O’s
Just to be honest sometimes I don’t even know
They love when I’m shirtless but they don’t want to be called some hoes.
So I cling to my purpose I keep moving like vroom
What do you want from me ?
Why do you talk to me
What do you know ?
I am I’m not scared of you
I am inevitable
The biggest question I have to ask myself sometimes is why did I forgave you ?
So cold but I am colder now
So froze My heart is frozen now
Who knows where we go from here
I was on the edge but I find myself on different pier.
Where do I go from here ?