You are a friend to other people but are You my friend?
You treat them with special care but do you treat me thus?
You give them all: time, love, effort but why do you give me little?
You say you love me truly or do you really love me?
Or do you love me because you want something from me?

I hear 'Dear Lord', 'Please Lord', 'Help me Lord',
'Forgive me Lord', 'I love you Lord';
And yet in reality - honestly you do not really care...
You call me when you are hurt, discouraged, failed -
Yet you do not think of me when you are happy.

Am I just a Genie or a Santa Claus to you?
Do you even like me -the "me" - the real me?
Or do you come to me because I am very rich?
Do you even believe that I am real and alive?

You cry when your friends hurt you
Yet you never recognized that I dry your tears -
You deny my attempts to bring you closer - -
It's ironic that you say I cannot understand what you feel - -
I created you in my own image, my strength, my love, my emotions, my prayers

When you feel that others do not love you
Remember - you turn away from me many times
And the feeling of unrequited love you have from others?
I oftentimes feel this one way love from you ...
It hurts, isn't it? That you love and they give back a little - - ?

I know the feeling....I do know the feeling...
But I love you even if you are like that...

​I was young and full of dreams
Wanting to be with you always
So I let my black hair grow long
'Til it would reach your heart​

You glanced at me many times
And I was too shy to confess
I looked at the skies everyday
As I brushed my cascading mane

I imagined your hands on me
Your fingers were so soft
Telling me that you adore me
As you ******* my long hair

The sun gave way to the moon
Silky black turned to gray
But still my hair is flowing
Past my untamed bitter heart

I look sadly at the starlit skies
When I alone brush my long tresses
Remembering regrets of the past
And knowing you bind up her hair.

I am a farm girl or love to pretend that I am one

I graduated with BS Psychology degree in 2009

Yet worked in a retail company for many many years.



I dreamed to be a clinical psychologist you know

As I counted the stocks and boxes in the warehouse

And voided transactions at the check-out-counters.



I desired to help people on how to deal with life's problems

Yet I could not cope up with my own majestic failures

The reality hit like a truck when I did not pass the exam.



I wallowed in the mud of self - pity and bitter tears

As I planted those leeks, basil, onions, peppers and dills

And waited patiently for the babies to sprout and grow.



I sowed dreams yet I nurtured other things like nightmares

And I reaped unrealistic, unhealthy desires and I cried hard

What happened to those teenage aspirations that I had?