I wish
For one day
That when I woke up
And looked in the mirror
As I caught a glimpse of myself
I could truly believe
I was pretty
Everyday
I wish

When you let someone in, they can let you down.
And when you get let down, you fall.
You fall hard and it hurts.
It hurts to feel that you were betrayed.
It hurts to know that someone you had trusted only told you lies.
It hurts to realize that you were stupid.
You opened yourself up, took down your walls for someone.
Someone you thought would be there for you.
But it turns out that they weren't.
So you fell.
And it hurt.
And no one is there to help you get back up.
Except you.
Sometimes you is all you have.
And sometimes you have to be enough.

I keep expecting something different,
Keep hoping to see a change.
I'm searching for the warmth of sun,
But all I feel is bitter rain.

I see the world as black and white,
Everything has its place.
But when I am in your presence,
My vision turns to gray.

My perceptions - off,
My morals - lost,
My heart, a blur of emotion.
My mind, like a deep chasm, wide open,
Tumultuous and raging like a stormy ocean.

And you cause all this commotion.

Cover up your secrets and insecurities
Keep yourself hidden from reality
Conceal your vulnerability from the world outside
Draw your curtains closed, keep everything inside

Awakened early in the morning
By the sounds of cheerful screams
Wake up, it's Christmas
Let's go to the Christmas tree!

Presents layed out
In a cheerful array
What joy they bring the children
On this Christmas day

Ribbons, bows and paper
Go flying in the air
As children open presents without a worry or a care

A day with family is spent
Reminiscing together over food
Laughing, smiling and feeling joy
But the day is ending soon

A sort of post-Christmas sadness
Looms in the air
As you realize this time is over
You can't help but stare

Stare at this picture perfect moment
Of your family together as one
Playing games and talking
Smiling and having fun

But what if this all changes
In the years or months to come
And your Christmas in the future
Isn't so much fun
What if you can't get together
With all of your family?
Will this scene that you see right now,
Be the scene you will always see?
For things change in an instant
And you really never know,
Will Christmas in the future,
Have this same happy glow?

She carries
The weight of her world
Upon her small shoulders
Trying to be strong and brave
When really she's dying
On the inside,
Her heart is ready to cave

The pressure
She feels
Everyday
She tries to escape it
If only she could find a way

But she is stuck
Keeping the world from crumbling down

But it crumbles anyway
She cries out for help
But no one comes around

Peer behind her eyes
You'll find it a surprise
That she doesn't think of happy sunny days

If you analyze behind her eyes
And look at the secrets she confines
You'll feel an overwhelming sense of pain

Cogs spinning in her mind
Trying to slow down the time
To stop it from ruining and hurrying her life

That smile that she wears
Each and everyday
Is meant to dismiss the fear on her face

She fears the
Tick-tick
Of the clock
Reminding her everyday that

Time comes and goes
Very fast
There's no way to make the moments last
Soon the present will be past
For time is ticking very fast

Once the time catches up
Her whole life will erupt
Into a new era of change
Traditions she used to cherish in her heart
Will never be the same

A place to call home
People to call family
Food to vanquish hunger
I am thankful

I'm always apologizing
Left and right
My apology is requested
From every peson in sight
But I don't think
This is right

They should be apologizing
For acting like I'm not there
For pretending I'm invisible
With no one to care

So next time you're looking
For my regrets
Just walk right by me
Because you won't be getting them yet

If I give you my all
You would still want more
I have nothing left
You've worn me to my core
I'm nothing now
Thanks to you
You've made me feel worthless
But that feeling is nothing new

Our flag hanging high
In the morning sky
Showing red white and blue
Symbolizing freedom for me,
And freedom for you

Today we honor
The brave men
That have fought to protect our country
Again and again

We owe it to them
These heroes called soldiers
Who fought for our country
And stood strong like a boulder
To protect America
The land of the free
Home of our brave men and women
We honor today every veteran

If everyone looked the same from head to toe
No one would stand out
Personalities wouldn't show
There would be no such thing as different
Because we would all be the same
The only thing that would differ
Would be our first and last names

If our world had one color
The rainbow wouldn't exist,
After sunshine and rain
There would be no pink or purple
The world would be dull and lame
Nothing in the world would vary
And our eyes would only see gray

So let me ask you this question
Please answer it honest and true
Is it really a crime to step out of line and show the world the real you?
Because everyone is afraid
To show their true colors
Because they're afraid
To be ridiculed by others
Would you like this world to be gray?
And have every one be the same?
My answer is no
Because I like to have variety every day

When the dark velvet blanket drapes across the sky
And the stars shine bright in the night
We shut our eyes
Turn the lights off
And drift into sleep
So peaceful and soft

In our sleep
We dream of things
We long to have
We dream of happiness, love and hope
To ignore all of the bad

In the morning
When we wake
We may not know
What we dreamed before
But we are granted with a little hope
Another open door

For each morning offers a new chance
To fix our mistakes
And change what was wrong yesterday
With thoughts from our dreams
That we dreamed when we were away

Away from the world
That is hard to survive in
Hard to have courage
Hard to live and strive in

But our dreams
They tell us
Where to go
How to act
And how to grow

So the world is not so bad
It is only dark at night
For if you close your eyes
And open them real soon
It will soon be time for you to dream along with the moon

I used to be best friends
With this girl in my grade
We hung out after school
Almost every day
Until that day
When she met that girl
That one day
That seemed to change my whole world

She started to change
Faster than I expected
It was like her system
Was suddenly infected
Infected with some disease
That's yet to be named
But until then
I will call it Fame
Fame seems to infect everyone
Person by person
The victims can be anyone

The girl that I knew
Well I guess I didn't know her fully
Because she has become something horrible
She has become a bully

She pushes kids in the hall
And teases everyone

Even I have become a victim
Of her symptoms she feels everyday
Where she forgets that I was her friend
And shoves me and calls me names
She says she never liked me
It was just pretend
And that was the moment
I was pushed off the deep end

I walked right up
To her face and said
Words that she would dread

I told her
That we've all had enough
Of being someone
That she bullies and taunts
Just to have fun
She needs to get some help
Because her bullying time has expired
I think it's time that she retired
Because I know she's not like that
The real her is stuck
Screaming inside
But she has been ignoring her
And pushing her aside


Well she finally changed her image
And her bully days were gone
But the days when we were friends
Have been long gone
Because once you take a glass
And throw it to the floor
It breaks in many pieces
That can't be fixed anymore
Because that's the thing about trust
Once it's crumpled it won't be flat


But will this really happen
The future holds the answer to that

We paint ourselves everyday from head to toe
Being careful with what we paint
Because every stroke shows
For when the paint tips over
All secrets will spill out
And our deepest fear that we hide inside,
Is to let those secrets out

For the mess we have made
We will pay the price
These stains will be permanent for the rest of our life
Showing bits and pieces of what we hide inside
For you to judge us wrong for what we know is right
What makes you think you've lived our lives?

We know you're broken because
We can see the expression on your face
So will give you a second chance,
To fix your mistakes
But remember we won't always be here
So you need to find a way
To be strong, be brave, have courage, and have faith.

We are all books
Just waiting to be read
Or a thought,
Deep inside
Just waiting to be said
We are judged from the outside
Our covers you see,
Are the only part you decide read

But next time you decide to look at me,
Open me up because
I'm a mystery

We come to a time
A certain part in our life
Where we must say goodbye

We may cry
We may not want to let go
Because it's hard
To walk away
And go into the unknown

So let's change our ways
Take away this common phrase
Let's not say goodbye
Let's say see you soon

In some way
Whether it's happens in a month
A year or two
We will meet again
I will get to see you

So goodbye isn't proper
To speak during departure
Because we aren't really leaving forever

We are always still tethered
To each other forever

So let's say see you soon
Because we know it will come
When we meet again
Thanks to a thing called love

Your words pierce my skin
Like a knife cutting steak
They go back and forth in my mind
Until they sever a piece
Of my heart off
Because that's what your words are meant to be
A weapon you use
Against me

People are leaving me
New people are joining me
People are meeting new people
Old friends are breaking up
These are all common examples
Of a thing called change
A thing that my mind is just not ready for
Because I can't take another goodbye

My notebook
Full of words
Letters
Commas and periods

My notebook
Full of smudges
Eraser bits
Crinkles and creases

My Notebook
Full of messages
Hidden Meanings
Energy and life

My notebook
Is the place,
The book
In which
I write

As I look in the mirror
I begin to stare
Who is the girl standing their
Faking her smile
Forcing her laugh
When really her heart is about to
CRACK
The mirror shatters
I duck to miss the pieces
Flying through the air
But as one passes by me
I just can't help but stare
The girl I saw before
Is still standing there
But now tears stream down her face
Because no one cares
No one cares how she feels
No ones kind enough to ask
So she wipes her eyes
Looks away
And walks away at last
The girl I saw in the mirror
During the summer when I was five
Has suddenly sprung to life
She is now alive
I'm the girl in the mirror
I reflect her
Skin and bones
So now I know how it feels
To feel like your all alone

You tell them your sad
And depressed
And tired
So you get attention
But your attention has expired
For once can it be me
Who has someone to care
Someone to tell me
"It's okay" when I'm scared
Scared of my thoughts
Swimming in a pool of anger in my head
They whisper and chant
"Be dead! Be dead!"
But you go ahead
And pretend to be sad
While I'm over here
Looking for a hand to grab

If I told you I was sad
If I told you I was lonely
If I told you I needed someone
If I told you I needed you
If I told you I'm drowning
In a pool of my tears
Well I've told you now
And it's been like this for years

Sitting at home
On a Saturday night
Check my Instagram feed
What a lovely surprise
All of my friends
Having the best time
And I'm here sitting
With tears in my eyes
But I should've known
When they said they were busy
That they were busy having fun
With people I called friends

And the caption says
"The crew is all here"
But they're missing a member
And she's sitting in tears
Feeling all alone
Because she's never invited
But she wipes her eyes
Because she has decided


I'm done with this nonsense
I'm done with all of it
I will hold my head up high
And I will learn to like it

So she double taps the photo
And that familiar heart appears
She smiles in triumph
She has conquered her fear

They Fly Around
Spreading hate instead of cheer
They Buzz all day
Spreading gossip from ear to ear
They Sting everyone
Excluding, teasing and lying
Queen Bees
Queen Bees
Leave every one crying