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Silver Jun 2018
First day in College,
A day in a roller coaster sit,
Fear and anxiety fills up your thoughts,
Will I be okay?

The walls emits different stories,
Different people but same feeling,
Grey number plates,
Is this my temporary residence?

You miss high school,
It’s not that you don’t want to go to college,
But you miss your old gang,
Will I will be able to laugh with the new one?

All this questions,
But there are no answers,
It’s just the first day,
Maybe I can get through.
Silver Apr 2018
It was about time that I sail away,
Away from the misery and pain,
The waves sway,
Just like my agonies and vain.

The water came down on me,
Crashing like the feelings I have for her,
The deep waters are not for me,
They are too bleak and lonely
Silver May 2018
Love is non-comparable,
It’s not the red balloon that you long for when you’re were five years old,
Or the sentiment you feel towards your dolls,
It’s the toys inside your box that you never played with.

Love is not a subject,
It’s not a chemical reaction that you learned in your chemistry class,
Nor an algorithm that you can figure out,
The problem that has no explanation is love,

Love is not a cinematic material,
It hits you like how a bat hits the ball,
It’s not a kiss in the rain,
Love is the time when you make up after an argument,

Love is not fictional,
It’s not the guy who has long brown hair,
Nor the lady who drinks coffee by the café window,
It’s the person behind this screen.
Silver Apr 2018
Night blooming cereus.

Mom do you remember when we're at the backyard enjoying the night sky?
We were anticipating for the night-blooming cereus to show its beauty,
It was beautiful as soon as it spread its petals,
And you told me. "You're like this flower once you're fully grown you'll be taken care of because you're as precious as this one."
I could only smile because I knew this kind of flower only blooms at night and die afterwards.

Mom, I am now a grown woman,
But I haven't told you about uncle Dorman,
Mom, at age of five he showed this odd endearment towards me,
I didn't like the way he looked at me,
I could feel by the way that he looks that he had feelings for me,
I wasn't wrong,
He really did like me.

At the age of fifteen, my purity is tainted with blood and that 1985 grape liquor in the cellar,
Mom, he touched me,
He snuck into my room and covered my mouth with his filthy hands,
He violated me,
He murdered my youth,
I knew then it was the end of me,

His heinous activities continued,
Every night he would stab me at my purity,
Use my temple for his libido,
**** my insides with his condemned being,

Mom, I can't take it anymore,
I hesitantly told you but,
But the expression you gave me wasn't the expression that I was expecting,
You started shouting at me and told me. "How can you disrespect a relative who kept you living"
I tried to explain,
I wasn't disrespecting him,
I was telling you the truth.

Time passed and I found an escape,
College happened and it was the time for me to live,
I had boyfriend and brought him home for dinner with the hopes of uncle will not touch or lust on me no more,
I felt secure until then.

Little did I know,
Uncle Dornan had a photograph of me,
Naked and tainted with his fluid,
I could only cry as the water run restless inside the bathroom.

Mom, I am now filled with anxiety,
I couldn't eat nor talk properly,
My whole life is breaking down and no one is there to help me,
That's when I started to tie a cheap rope that I bought from the nearest convenience store on the ceiling of my room,
I did end everything,
The sorrow,
The pain,
And the hurting,
I am in a better place now, Mom.
And you we're right, I was like a night blooming cereus,
I only lived a short life

— The End —