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Emily M 1d
Long ago
I recall
Standing up tall
Pulling myself up
Then falling down
Crying, wailing in pain
Thundering footsteps come
Later
Taken away
Then all is just gone
Lost from memory

Eventually
Strapping on the heavy boot
Black fabric
Velcro straps
Comfortable, despite the injury
Then came crutches
Smiling despite my pain
Showing I am not prey

Months of waiting
Slowed down
Pressing questions
Too much fuss over something so small
Leave me;
Go care for thy self

"A little more time will do you good."
Never in any extra second was it
The torture 'twas
Unable to do much of anything
Merely there
Observing everything
Another world away
Muzzle in a book

At last, the day came
Freedom once again!
Just awaiting the moment
To run into the wilderness

- Emily M
April 17th, 2019
In the summer between 3rd and 4th grade, I sprained my Achilles tendon. I don't remember what happened after I fell off of a bar at the 'Swim & Gym' summer camp. I do recall that later I had to wear a boot, and be on crutches. The crutches only lasted a couple of months, but the boot lasted for about 4 months. When I was almost in the clear, they added another month to keep the boot on. I read books in my spare time, and when I was healed all I could think about was running.
Emily M 1d
Unimaginable joy
Un-channel-able emotion
So good
Yet so terrifying
Fear of messing up
But boundless joy of the return of emotion

How shall this be placed into words?
I wonder
Coming up with anything
Yet nothing truly fits

Shaking before you
Looking down in nervousness
Then
Embrace
Short, yet so sweet

Heartbeat
So loud and calming
Then a little wave goodbye
Once out of sight
A little twirl in the sun
Smiling in glee
For what has become of me

Taking a seat
My heart skips a beat
Thinking of this marvel
That this has become.

- Emily M
April 17th, 2019
Emily M 1d
Following me
Chilling my bones
Sending ripples through my muscles
Fear slowly injected into my veins

Running
Shouting
But none show
None are there
Only you

Panting
Looking back
Only to see you are lost
In a forest so dark and unknown
Stealing the light
Not even doing so much
As to put up a fight

Feather falls
Bird unseen
Cries into the void
Echos returning
Haunting

Fragile soul
Yet ever so bold
Stronger as it grows old
Scrape away the mold
To reveal the marvel within

But this mold
Cracked and chipped
Will it ever break of its prison?
Will it ever glimpse a future
Beyond this childhood?

Laughter
Cries
Wailing from the depths of the heart
Only one of two emerges
Taking the child in
Arguments burst
Continue
For years...

Finally
Break
Separate
Blame
It overwhelms

Temporary stability
Then the world quakes
Your life shakes
Then all is quiet
Only for a little while

Yelling, shouting,
Whilst I am hiding
Trying so hard to escape it
But you're too caught up
In your terror and rage
That you don't think of me
Hiding in the dark
Waiting for the sweet
Yet haunting
Sound of silence...

- Emily M
April 17th, 2019
Emily M 2d
Aching in my chest
Pain of loss
Yet who have I lost?

Running to the balcony
Laying on the edge
Looking at the stars
Taking the pain away...

Barely holding on
The demons I'm made of
Locking myself in
Letting them win
But I didn't stand a chance,
Did I?

They say they'll make you right
But they only make you worse

Long endless highway
Finally pulling to the streets
Intersection
Turning
Someone runs a red light
Braking, we're inches away from being hit.

Driving off like it was nothing
But I could have lost you
All of you...

Later
Sitting alone in the dark
One...two...three...
Four...five...six...
Used to take one
Now it takes six
Going over
But never under
Shaking uncontrollably
But I'll be okay
I'll still be alive...

I feel my heartbeat
Wondering when it will stop
Letting me go
Into the unknown

I swear I love you
But if I stay
I'll only destroy you...
That's all I ever do
To everyone I love...

Fighting to stay
Yet yearning to go
It all comes back to this
Doesn't it?

I can't take your hand
Mine are bound
Living a nightmare
Crying, aching,
Breaking
But somehow
I'm still here
I just want to hear you
Saying
"Lets go home.."

- Emily M
April 16th, 2019
Memories just...haunt
Emily M 3d
Walking to fate
Door opens
Familiar face
But even so
Not all things familiar
Should be welcomed with embrace

Waiting
Discussing
Then
The new solution!?

No
Only anger
Impulses
Thoughts still uncontrollable
"Go, go.."
But that's not what they're supposed to say.

Still the same thoughts
Unchanged
Never caged
Not for long in the least

A cure?
Impossible
No such thing could be
Even if it were
Without me knowing
It would be buried
Deep inside me
Beyond that of which I cannot recall
Cast to the lowest it may go

Tears, screaming, pain,
Everything becoming dull
My reason for being made null
But still I remain
Still I drag myself along
This rugged road
Feeling so much
But nothing at all...

- Emily M
April 15th, 2019
Emily M 3d
Hopeless and left for dead
Going with what they say
Pretending
Hiding behind the mask
Never to ask...
"Help me."

Words, images,
This madness consuming
The darkness surrounding
Calling to me
Whispering my name
Making nightmares reality
Reminding me of what is to come...

Locked myself in the bathroom
Lying on the floor
Delicately, firmly,
Dragging the needle across my skin
My pain
Reminding me
That I am still alive
Still human...

Lying alone in my room
I cry out
But no sound escapes my lips
Not a sound
Aside from each breath
Each one forced

Closing my eyes
Hearing whispers
Too scared to utter a word
To a soul

Trembling
Back to the wall
Curled in a ball
Tears forced on
Pain throbbing
Thoughts bobbing
In the ocean of my mind.

- Emily M
April 15th, 2019
Emily M 3d
New week
Relief
Realizing
There was no reason to worry!

You were not told
So I can put my anxiety on hold
Yet still
I wonder...
Is there a chance
In the future?

My emotions
Churning like oceans
The inner tempest
In temporary rest...

Still
I hope this is a phase
While I walk
In this maze
Of which
Is nameless.

Waiting
For the time
When my heart stops racing
My pulse under control
Put out this strange fire
Pulsing in my veins

Other matters
Unmentioned
Hidden
Left for another piece
Of the endless numbers
Of parchment
To hold my thoughts.

- Emily M
April 15th, 2019
He wasn't told after all! Okay....hopefully this will pass, and I can stop this crazy feeling. Heh....jeez, I'm such an idiot.
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