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2.2k · Jan 2017
Motivation & Reward
Viktoria Jan 2017
The path you take
The choice you make
It's all your decision
It's all your own vision

Cause everything's possible
This everything's now
It is what it is
You never know how

But if you believe
You can make a difference
And what a relief
This knowledge might bring
Just try everything
Try to do it your way
Let this be your one,
Your only experience

Remember that day
You look back on life
You see what it brings
You're staying alive

The difference
It's there
No one can deny
You made it,
You can
You are satisfied
 :)
1.8k · Feb 2017
Self encouragement
Viktoria Feb 2017
It's getting me worried
It loses all glory
Confusion and fears
Is there, what appears

Another strange moment
The energy's missing
Its colour is new
A new day processing

As if I changed
My program in brains
As if the software
Needed some updates

Relaxed but tense
The opposites rule
Too less defense
Too much to do

The energy's a useful tool
I need to get from somewhere
It should appear inside of me
Not the confusion, that I see

I kinda lost something
The passing days
I tried to evaluate
But it's a mess

I wanted it perfect
I wanted it right
But now life's teaching me
It's alright

I gotta accept it
I gotta move on
I gotta just stop
Comparing at all

Too much to question there
I know, I don't know where
The best solution's hiding
But I will fight, Ill find it

This is already
What I do right now
I give myself energy
I give myself power

I encourage myself
To go on
Keep on moving
On fighting
Stop crying
Amusing how dramatic it sounds
My creativity now is unbundling

I will heal the confusion
I will break the illusion
I will always keep going
And myself, it is growing
1.3k · Feb 2017
Embrace the moment
Viktoria Feb 2017
Don't lose
Your knowledge
Darling
Don't get lost
In your brain
Expecting
Something bad
Is surely
The wrong way
But good is
To rethink
The attitude
You have
To question it
In logic
There's a proof
Ahead
Step further
Don't be worried
Nothing can stop you now
Examine to the fullest

The free feeling
The round
The evident
The present
The beautiful
The rare
Emotion
Moment
Ground
Obsession
Love and care
1.0k · Jan 2017
The anchor of my heart
Viktoria Jan 2017
The anchor of my heart
Please let me work

Stop holding me back
This struggle's a fact

Set me free instead
Let me focus on something but that

The anchor of my heart is too heavy
To move forward

I wanna cut it off
But I don't have the power

The anchor of my heart
Killed the message, the life
It is always there, this strife

And I can't move it
It's calm but heavy
It pulls my heart down
To the ground
Until the motion
Is frown
And there is no way back
I'd better understand
My emotions instead
The only way out
Is not to scratch on the surface
To ignore the internal maze
But to take a deep breath in
And to deal with the anchor within
845 · Mar 2017
No time left
Viktoria Mar 2017
No time left
And confusion
Now seems
All a sweet
Illusion
These
Feelings'
Collusion
In brains
I won't
Let it get
Into veins
There's
No real
Pain
It's only
Artificial
Caused by
Fears
And caused by
Indecision
810 · Jan 2019
Just for love
Viktoria Jan 2019
I am just searching for someone
To fall in love with
Because it is that feeling
That I miss.
694 · Feb 2017
Everything will be fine
Viktoria Feb 2017
Everything will be fine
Said she once
Said she twice

Everything will be fine
Just let it happen, alright?

Said she once, said she twice.

But this time, there's a difference

Because this time she herself is in this.
Waiting, waiting, she says to herself in distress
Waiting is the right way
For the moment, to escape
All those feelings insight
In her heart in her mind

"Let it happen" haha
"I just want to be far"
Far away from all of this
Even though she's gonna miss
Almost everything about him
Her and him - a perfect team

Trust is worth it
Be courageous
She is fearful
Never mentioned
How she felt ever before

Love is worth it
Scary word
She's frightened
She's shocked

She wants to hide
Though in her mind
There is a motivation

"I can't, I never mentioned..."
And all she knows after all this
That she's gonna miss his kiss
The one she never ever got.
Viktoria Feb 2017
There is no such thing as bein' adult
It's just an expression of many
It's just an abstraction-puddle
In which humans are hiding forever.

There's no such thing as the adult world
Cause every person lives on Earth
And here at times everyone takes a sword
To conquer this castle or another

There's no such thing as an adult behavior
Cause every person feels giggly at times
In fact these times are the ones we remember
We don't need to label them "a child inside"

There is no such thing as an adult
But you can call everyone a child
Cause that's the first name we're all given
And we all are trying to hide

There is no such thing as an adult
The only thing there's is an actor
And acting forever, without a break
The need to hide, to lie, to fake
It's all but good for a human being
Who's trying to avoid the lifeless way of living
654 · Jan 2019
A look planted
Viktoria Jan 2019
A seed planted,
Turned around,
Hope.
A look planted,
Turned around,
Hope.
A smile more,
Turned around,
Hope.
Another look, longer,
Turned around,
I hope I touched your soul.
...because you definitely touched mine.
613 · Feb 2017
Affection
Viktoria Feb 2017
I wanna see you again
I miss your eyes
I wanna see you again
This madness, skies

I wanna feel your warmth
Your evidence
I wanna feel you more
Than ever did

I wanna touch you
Please, let me to
I wanna hug you gently
Under the moon

I wanna see your happiness
The crazy one
I wanna feel your breath
Until it's gone
Viktoria Apr 2017
You either struggle or you don't
This is your own decision
The way you look at things along
You build up your own vision

Please tell yourself that nothing ever
Should make you worry in this way
No one should ever get the power
To make you sad and not okay

It's hard sometimes cause we believe
This one is the one out of many
But do we want this person still
To make us feel really unhappy?
566 · Jan 2017
Let it happen
Viktoria Jan 2017
Don't think that this is wrong
Don't think, embrace the feeling
Don't try to see the cons, the pros
Just stop and let it happen

Don't try to figure out
But try to feel and not to doubt
The moment's truth is inside of you
And only you can let it happen

Don't worry too much
Just feel the real touch
The beauty, the moment's obsession
And simply let it happen

The feeling's always worth it
Don't try to run away from it
That'll be so dishonest
Just let it happen and smile

Open up, right now
Embrace the feeling
The power, the notion
And finally let happen the emotion

No one will judge you, only your feeling counts, stop being afraid of yourself
Stop hiding in someone else's shape but yours
and better let it happen.
558 · Mar 2017
The perfect state
Viktoria Mar 2017
Whatever happens - I am ready
No fears, only excitement
Whatever happens, nothing bothers
Here I am, no suffering, no more

Embracing every obstacle
Like in a game
Even if I got too much out of the frame
Whatever happens, I am ready now
No questioning, no doubts
Playing around
So happy
Being me
That's what I like to be
548 · Mar 2017
The King
Viktoria Mar 2017
Once upon
A time
A King
Spoke in a
Rhyme:
"Tonight Folks,
You will not believe
I'll show you
Something very deep
Inside of me
The secret is
Too hard to keep...
Too long have
I waited to speak
It out loud."

everyone
in the crowd
listened excitedly
to the royalty
speaking in clarity:
"My dearest crowd"

everyone bowed
to the King's Sound

As he went on:
"What's meant to be
Is what is nature's will.
For what feels right
Is what is real"

the people stood still...
waiting for more
the King being nervous
they couldn't ignore...
While he took a deep breath in
and scratching his chin let them know:

"So friends, I'll tell you
What I mean...
From now on
I will be your Queen."
Speaking of the LGBT-community, do what feels right and don't care about what other people say. "For what feels right is real". Freedom to every human being on this planet!
463 · Mar 2017
As hot and cold as a stone
Viktoria Mar 2017
As hot and cold as a stone
When it hits the asphalt
It hit me on the inside
When I suddenly saw you
from a distance tonight

The sparks burned bright
But disappeared within a second
The hope has died
It only seemed to be awaken

Ridiculous, to let the light in
Again. I fell back into memories
I better should go on and forget
How bad I felt those days

I gave you the power,
Do you understand?
How much you meant to me
How much I cared
Now everything is hidden
In the sand
of pale old memories

I never got to hold your hand
But I am still thankful for that
For the beauty and the feeling
For the taking and not giving
You taught me about myself
I discovered through you
How I am dealing with
Situations like this
To get hurt and to miss
To get lost and to find
To be weak and to fight
To lie, to cry, to laugh and smile

I say thank you and you
Will never know
How much I grew through you
Through high and low

I remembered everything right then
When I saw you tonight in an instant
As hot and cold as a stone
When it hits the asphalt...
Met someone who used to be enormously important to me unexpectedly again and memories of feelings came back for a moment
453 · Feb 2017
A sober reply
Viktoria Feb 2017
Now you talk like that to me
All emotional and all impulsive
I am tempted to reply
In the same unreasonable way

But because of that
I will keep it back
Staying calm for a moment or two.

To find the right answer for you.
Viktoria Feb 2017
Who knows if you think differently
Or if you think the same
Who knows if you feel similar
Or if it's just a game

Who knows if this occured to you
As something special ever
Who knows if I would have liked you
Even if I said "never"

Who knows, but I never say never
Because I live in the present
Just like you
Who knows maybe if I stayed forever
There could be more than friendship
Between me and you

Who knows if you even ever wondered
How the day looked like without me
Who knows if you have ever thought
That that's so important to me

I'll probably never know
Or once after some years
I might meet you again
And fight against my tears

That day we could be changed
Or changing or be same
If this time we arranged
We'd both be nervous anyway

If that's the only thing
That is left to us then
We still would have the same
The lovely atmosphere
And once we might stay here
Together once without to fear
416 · Jan 2017
Be
Viktoria Jan 2017
Be
Be a unicorn
Be just be
Float through grass
And to the sea

Be a seahorse
Be just be
Nothing is worse
Than not to be

Be a grasshopper
Jump through the green
Cause green means hope
And it guides every leap

Be a bear in the woods
Dance around every tree
Be the forest, the roots
Feel the nature, feel free

Be a small butterfly
Floating to every flower
Be a human, just be
And enjoy every hour
404 · Jan 2017
Oh routine
Viktoria Jan 2017
Oh routine you are gorgeous
Let me feel nor old nor young
Oh routine, all my emotions
They are simply dead and gone
Cause routine, you are here
And you're making me flow
From the minute to day
To the week and Monday
All the way to the night
You're my day-satellite
Nothing new on my way
And as long as you stay
There won't be a single creation.

All I have is the routing vane
And the color of hay
Lighting everyday
Even blood of my veins
And the pulse of my brain
Have the same and old color
Of routine-blinded pain.
394 · Jan 2019
Anxious
Viktoria Jan 2019
To lose yourself
Is scary

As not to know
The way

You see a million directions
And you're afraid to choose

You're overanalyzing
Lose touch to any feeling

You're transparent like a ghost
There's no sense in your existence

You see no sense at all.

Like a trombone
The sound of pain in mind
Your brain gets hurt
You're stuck

Can barely breath
Why breath at all?
If you're a ghost

You're scaring, hurting others.
What a shame.

Who will be ever able to love you?
It mustnt be true, it must be a game.
It's a process though. In darkness you can see the light even better, even if it's a tiny spot somewhere far away. Keep holding on to it.
390 · Dec 2018
Vacuum
Viktoria Dec 2018
Forgot how to poem
Forgot how to rhyme
Tryin to find ways
To express myself

My void on the inside
Doesn't leave me much
I can't really say how I feel
Can't really reach it or touch

Got some physical pain
Cause the body knows
When the emptiness within me
Grows and my soul hurts

All this vacuum is there for me to hide
What I feel so bad about and what I mind

I don't see it all but it is there
It's invisible but I am tryin to share
Feeling empty after a bad incident in my family. Trying to find ways to express this inner void. I know that eventually I'll find peace again and poetry always helps to speed up the recovery
386 · Feb 2017
Insanely insane
Viktoria Feb 2017
Insanely insane
No program in brain
No chain to attain
No page to stain

No need to repeat
Issues to reheat
The past doesn't last
Anyway

Speculation is ******
And the son of disorder
Like a drama recorder
Playing again and again

The anxiety's claws
From the head to the toes
In a circle it goes
Reoccurring pain
382 · Apr 2017
Short poem
Viktoria Apr 2017
Precious time
Great ideas
I am using these

I don't want
To lose them
Make them useless

Automatically
Planning out
Creativity
Is the ground

No illusions
Can be found
No strategic
Or deep wounds

Truth is happiness
With no fear
And creations are
Its best friends

Beautiful
Nice to hear
This is how this short poem
Ends
382 · Feb 2019
Could it be a new romance?
Viktoria Feb 2019
A mysterious coincidence,
I love mystery, it's exciting,
Could it be a new romance?
Because romantic atmosphere is igniting.

I am thinking of you and your glances,
Shining brightly across the room,
But I still don't know the colour of your eyes,
From a distance I was watching you...

'Look at me', I thought, and there you did.
And you spoke to me right across the room,
You spoke of the day when we will meet,
For a movie and - I hope - a date.

You said, that you hadn't forgotten,
No way, of course you had not,
Don't worry that day you will see me,
From much less far, than so far.

I was a bit nervous, I admit,
But maybe you were nervous too,
I looked at your forearms, uncovered,
to see if I spot a **** tattoo...
or maybe even two.

But no, at least not on your forearms
And maybe you're not the person for that.
I am keen on getting to know you,
I am not gonna regret that we met.

So all my reveries keep on dancing,
Around me, my soul and my head,
Your eyes' spark from a distance,
The warmth that I couldn't forget.

I am pretty sure that you like me,
And for now that is all I want.
I am happy that I can tell you more,
Once we meet, only the two of us, for sure.
378 · Mar 2017
If only
Viktoria Mar 2017
Sometimes we don't know
Where to go
If only we learned to cope
Through belief and hope
377 · Apr 2017
What would death feel like?
Viktoria Apr 2017
What would death feel like?
Strong and mighty...
Like a fight?
Neutral ignorant
Maybe
Or just fearful
Not to be

Would it maybe
Rather be
Happy and relaxed
Or isn't it for us
To see how long it lasts?

Is there something like pre-death
Just to put us to the test
To see the reaction beneath
To examine if we are ready

It is possible
That death is a new start
Some do believe in it
It's not too hard
But tough
Is to assume
That nothing will follow
Nor time nor space no room
All in one swallowed

And I think to myself
If that's what death is like
Do we even have to worry
To die in a certain glory
Or too young or too soon
Because if nothing follows
Then the you disappears
In a moment with all fears
And if you don't feel
You are not alive
So death might be less crucial
Than we're used to assume
Our attitudes, opinions will be gone
Our feelings all disappear on their own
And with them our very own soul
Which might continue its adventure
In a different creature.
370 · Apr 2017
Everytime
Viktoria Apr 2017
Everytime I meet someone new
Who is cute, with interesting attitude
I get to choose -
If to save the contact or to lose...
I am starting to imagine me
Being in love desperately
Having settled a romance suddenly
Being able to become a couple

I don't know if I am starting too early
But I know for sure, he does too
Because I don't think I ever have to worry
About me having this attitude
My friend once said:
It's good to keep the naivety
Instead of learning from failures negativity.
I guess I'm gonna follow the advice
And I'm not gonna rethink it twice
Sometimes
You gotta live and let it happen
Sometimes
This is the way it should be done
It is so often here and now or never
So take this moment, do what feels right
And what makes fun.
This way you're gonna gain experiences
All of a sudden you become enriched
I am not trying to teach you a lesson
Your life is the one who is gonna teach :)
369 · Apr 2017
What will happen next?
Viktoria Apr 2017
Time, seconds, weeks, days
Randomly combined states
Never-ending, always standing
By your side forever

You know it seems unreal
I don't know how I feel
I don't believe what happened
With you and me that night

This time the tension more than tense
I didn't lie, didn't pretend
I didn't have to hide
My feelings
And you
Were honest too.

Believing in the past
The feeling which didn't last
Where is it right now
That's what I am wondering about
While I am here
And you are not
I am really close to question a lot
And I ask myself
What will happen next
Because I am afraid
That the feelings are away
361 · Apr 2017
The game
Viktoria Apr 2017
If you don't call
I will not either
It is so cold without you
If you will fall
But won't catch me
I will not cry
About it
Since I can live
Without it

If you don't talk
So will not I
The silent wall
Between us
If you are tired
So am I
I will not entertain us

If you forget
I can do too
Sometimes fear
Is a useful tool
Afraid of pain
Of having lost
I better let you
Fall down first

If you don't see
So won't do I
I will not cry
And will not fight
If you will try
To get me back
I might come back
But only once
Again
A human self-protective reaction. Pride. Pretending. Revenge? Misunderstanding. Love? Hate?
Viktoria Jan 2017
She was there alone that night
She was thinking, she felt fright
She was alone and there was light
She didn't go, she didn't mind

He was a perfect idea of many
He would have found her
And understood
She was alone and the night rather rainy
She stayed at home here
She embraced her fear

Fears and Ideas
Mixed up together
Just as a bright foggy snowy weather
Tumbling around
Feeling dizzy and drunk
Thoughts are confusing
Why do they matter?

She sat there and sat
The candle burned red
The light throwing scary pictures around her
She tried to believe, she hoped
But today she didn't received the relief
Anyway
339 · Jun 2018
Chasing Stars
Viktoria Jun 2018
If you and me were on a road trip to somewhere only we know.
Everything would be different.
If you and me had time to get away … into the nature.
If you and me had time to get away
We would, believe me, I would want it badly.
I'd love to show you places,
And to go places with you.
No need for other people, maybe apart from gas stations' salesmen.
Only us and the beautiful nature,
No social boundaries … just life.
Because you are just a person. And I am a person, too.
You have just the same needs, feelings, thoughts.
You have a soul that tries to understand.

Your smile is just as warm as a sun’s ray can be.
You saw enough of lies, of dark and scary forest paths.
You’ve been through this, you lost yourself.
You found the light to get out of the madness.
Still social boundaries were haunting you.
Tying you up and forcing you to ground.

You’re learning and that is beautiful to see.
How you adopt, you build up and progress.
You learned to step out for yourself
To stand strong, to survive the hell.

Sometimes you can’t believe what you’ve been through.
Sometimes you want to run away and to forget.
But life is here and now,
You need to stick to what is there. Right now.

Believe me, watching stars and riding horses.
Going to swim in clear blue waters,
Diving into the ocean… of love.
But I don’t know if that would be enough.

You can be anyone. You know that, right?
Nothing is given for or to us by our birth but life.

Belief is all that counts. You can become whatever you believe into.
Sometimes… and almost always… the societies are blind.
Listen to your own self and ignore what anyone expects.
Be and enjoy life for yourself.
You deserve this my darling, please believe.

…..
Let’s pretend we’re chasing stars with our glances,
But in souls we’re calm as this word could ever be.
Let’s imagine we can get away
And leave the society to live free.
328 · Mar 2017
I remember
Viktoria Mar 2017
I remember us
We talked. We laughed
We were happy to have each other
We have trusted one another
And I never thought
This might end.

I remember how
We spent so much time together
We talked about everything
Being open books to one another
And I never could imagine
This might end.

I remember those long nights
After having said "sleep well"
We were still talking about this and that
Even though both very tired the next day
We always did it again and again
And I never believed
This might end.

I remember being so happy with you
Laughing so much that it hurt
Trusting you, being there for you
Always wanting to keep that forever
-
Years and years. And at first
Our friendship grew stronger.
But having reached the highest point
The time and space became our enemies.
I never expected
This to have an end.

I know deep inside you understand
But you stopped chasing those good memories
Still it was hard for me to let them go
...
Anyway I just wanted to let you know
All my secrets and thoughts
All my losses and pains
I wanted to share with you
What was in my heart, in my veins
But you lost the belief in us
And we couldn't keep the trust

And I never again got to know
About how you feel deep inside
What you actually think in your mind
How you feel about losing your best friend
Because now our friendship seemed to end

And I always blamed the circumstances
But I knew that you changed a lot
So maybe if you didn't let go off
We could still make it through everything
Just how we used to do it once before -
When I never could imagine
This might end.
The friendship is unfortunately fading and I don't feel that I can save it anymore. Unfortunately. We picked to go different ways.
325 · Feb 2017
Live
Viktoria Feb 2017
If you wanna laugh -
                                   Laugh!

If you wanna cry -
                                   Cry!

If you wanna love -
                                   Love!

But if you wanna die -
                                   Don't...
323 · Feb 2017
Something
Viktoria Feb 2017
Something very deep inside
Something I have tried to hide
Somewhere farther than my mind

Something I don't understand
Something deep inside my head
Somewhere I can't really get

Something that I just have found
Something big something unproud
Somewhere no one ever got

Something huge
Something new
Something scary

Something I will work out soon
Somewhere only me and moon
Thinking deeply, using time
Feeling like myself and I

Shall the weirdness stop that day
It ain't meant to stay forever
I will deal with it, find the reason why
This new challenge shall begin!
And the light is there to guide
Through the darkness of my mind
Through confusion, through the night.
323 · Feb 2017
Too speculatiOUS
Viktoria Feb 2017
Way too speculatious
That's how I'm used to be
I feel like passing weeks
Stole me some energy

I question myself
My thoughts
Everything
Because of what
He said
Because of him

I try to discover the truth
But all I am doing is hiding
I need to climb up a roof
To escape the walls
Which are blinding

I used to believe
In a set of rules
With different maxima
That brought me relief
I used to realize
That I can always choose
I don't know how
This all I could lose

Probably I saved it
In the back of my mind
Behind the part
That I'm trying to hide

Oh that's the solution
It possibly is
I have to let go
The things
I won't miss

I have to accept
Me - the way I am
I have to move on
And not to hold on

Confusion's a product
Of indecisive moods
That's how I take
This problem by its roots

I have to make decisions
Because they count
I have to choose
And not to doubt
307 · Jan 2017
The sinner is you
Viktoria Jan 2017
The sinner is you
I've fallen for you
And there's no reason
Not to be true
It is the wrong season
For me and you
Confess your sin
Or live within
The sinner is you
Since now I love you
303 · Feb 2017
Check out
Viktoria Feb 2017
Check in and
Check out
Breath in
And breath out
Let's play
A new game
Insane in the
membrane
Figure out
Too much
Feeling Free
Wild Touch
Catching Plays
I am ready
It went heavy
It went steady
Stop and think
First
Never be
Sad
Take your time
For this
A lot more
Than that
Having this
Right now
Makes me Question
Much
Waiting
Many hours
Until the
Real touch
Worth it
Was it
Still
It is new
To me
We felt same
Before
We felt differently
I'll embrace it now
And I'll take my time
There's no need
For structure
Feelings
Find the
Way
299 · Jan 2017
I can't help
Viktoria Jan 2017
I can't help but at times
I just need my expression
Words, songs, dances or smiles
They are all my obsession
Art's my drug and my best friend forever
I can't help but at times I love rhymes.
298 · Jan 2019
Just asking to ask
Viktoria Jan 2019
I am just asking to ask,
To get an answer from you,
I am just looking, to look,
To have you look at me, too.
I am so careful, I am,
******, I am just too shy.
I am afraid to risk it,
And show the interest I deny.
287 · Mar 2017
Bubble of doubt
Viktoria Mar 2017
I don't know
Something's wrong
I feel weird
I feel low

Seems like a circle
All the way round
Feels like a bubble
Bubble of doubt

Doubts everywhere
Doubts here and there
The insecurities
Have become real

Why do I feel
The things I feel
The world is changing
All around me

I have to hear
And to perceive
This is not the world
This is only me

Not only me though
Me and my mind
They have caused this
They are combined

Since I know this
I have to go on
Being aware
Cause it's nothing at all.
Viktoria Jan 2017
I feel like this is not enough
The letters in my phone
The words the sentences
The phrases they're all alone

It is not enough
This one tiny dimension
It is if I would mention you
Only once in my life

They don't really transfer
The way how I feel
How much moments with you
Mean to me

And sometimes I act weird
Because my self esteem
Sometimes's so overwhelmed
By your awesomeness

I believe that I feel
The same way that you feel
But the burdens between us
They will not set us free

And the day that we will
Have to say the goodbye
I will hug you so tight
To save this in my mind

To save the feeling
I won't let you go
Because your smile's
The warmest I ever saw

And I want you to know
That the future has changed
For we're different now
And we want to have more

And I bet that one day
You will go for me
Visit me
And that that day
We'll become more than ever
Close to the sun
To the magic we lost for a while
282 · Jan 2017
I wanna hear you telling me
Viktoria Jan 2017
I wanna hear you telling me
That I'm the one
I wanna listen to your heartbeat
Embrace your soul

I wanna keep you by my side forever
I don't ever want to say goodbye
Oh never
271 · Feb 2017
Step further
Viktoria Feb 2017
You never know
So try
It can hurt
But you won't die
To try it
Is still amazing
Since you're trying
You're not lazy
Fighting for yourself
Giving it a chance
Overstep the boarder
To get a reward
269 · Jan 2017
Poem without a reason
Viktoria Jan 2017
To write a poem
Without a reason
Isn't as easy at all
It is like being in prison
While outside is a freezing fall

At least Im in warmth
Thought the prisoner then
This space is enough
This is how I'll defeat
Myself in the dark but a warm
A Prisoner's room
A cell and a loop
Of daily routine
Are just like poutine
For those people to fight
It's like energy light

It isn't easy at all
To write a poem about any thing
Because when there's no goal
You gotta create one and think.

The prisoner tried
To reason, believe
He started to fight
And relived a relief
Viktoria Feb 2017
It's not the time for a boyfriend
It's not
And I am not just saying

I am in between
My life is within
It's not the right time for a boyfriend

No relationship would be right right now
I am not myself
I have to figure out

Everything is changing now
It is transformation time
Somehow

And all in all
That's what I am trying to say
It's not the right time for a boyfriend
It's not.
266 · Feb 2017
It is time
Viktoria Feb 2017
It is time
To let go soon
But I am not ready

It is time
To forget
But I won't

It is time
Time flows by
Now it's running
Out

It is time
But for me
There's no doubt

It is time
Fact's a feeling
Emotions

It is time
So revealing
But tense

It is time
Never jumped
Into the ocean

It is time
You became
My best friend

It is time
To finish
All the plans

It is time
And for us
There's no chance

It is time
And the future
Will bring more

It is time
I can't tell you
What for

It is time
I am wondering
How strong

It is time
The emotions
Have been

It is time
It is beautiful
Though

It is time
I won't forget
About it

It is time
And I have
To say goodbye

It is time
And it's difficult
Sometimes

IT IS TIME
But I don't wanna
Let go

It is time
I just wanted to
Let you know
266 · Jan 2017
Early too early
Viktoria Jan 2017
Early too early
I wanna sleep
But something is burning
Right in the deep

The thoughts, the ideas
Are crossing my mind
How long will they stay
I have to decide

They are impolite
I won't ever miss them
But they'll keep on coming
Again and again

With every visit
They'll put a weird pressure
On me
Like when you're in desert
And have to keep water
Until you see a village
Whith a certain relief

Sometimes I managed
To empty the bottle
Because I was certain
There was a fountain
But when I came closer
The hope broke all over
It was just another mirage
In my brain.

And they keep on visiting me again.
262 · Jan 2019
Denial or The Casual Trap
Viktoria Jan 2019
I know what's going on.
Oh now I see.
My heart's been warning me,
I kept ignoring thee.

Denial as in all the songs,
And in its stronger version,
Put it on myself.
I put it on, how you hurt me,
To keep moving on,
All proud, no doubt.

Pretending nothing happened,
I told lies, to me, to you,
I barely am ready
To see the truth.

Now however it's unleashed,
And it's gonna hurt
Just like it's supposed
Way back then,
When you hurt me.
You started to ignore me
And how dare you,
I ignored you too!

It was my only way,
It's been.
I am accepting it,
I will, I will..!
I know that I was fooling well
Myself, my friends, my mind.
But my heart always said no,
When I lied.

When I denied,
That in truth,
I didn't want to let go easily.
I didn't want you to ignore me suddenly.
I was hit cold blooded by your coolness,
I was left, scattered, shattered,
With a broken chest.

And alone I sat there, all alone.
But I tried to take care of my own,
So instead of looking down on me,
I pretended my heart to be complete,
And to leave, my head higher than your actions could reach me.

I denied that in truth I loved you,
I denied my emotions to you,
Because you weren't tied too close to me.
You wanted to keep things just casually.
258 · Mar 2017
Happy
Viktoria Mar 2017
Happy
Tonight
Feeling
Alright
After long time
Here we go

Happy to hear
Listen to me
Very important
I know

Loving
Myself
Embracing
The world
This is what life
Is about

Happy to see
Happy to be
This
lovely
Truth
Makes
Me proud
249 · Feb 2017
Leaving the circle
Viktoria Feb 2017
Interesting how everything evolves
You lose yourself to
Find your Self again
Knocking on a door
That was never there
Trying to defeat yourself
When nothing attacks
Forcing positivity to come
Even when you know
In a neutral world
No regrets no doubts
No fears no thoughts
Should upset a creature like You.
Hiding automatically behind
A milky blurry glass of uncertainty
Waiting for the right step to step

But what if you change your attitude and stop to wonder too much about this nonexistent negativity
Change your mind set and embrace this very moment
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