I feel as if I were hit by a truck.
Joints aching.
Bones creaking.
Slow movement.
Internally suffer
as I pretend it doesn't hurt.
Tight muscles.
Fake smiles.
Can't get up.
Slowly drowning in my own pain.

Fake smile
Dried eyes
Scratched wrists
Bruised thighs
White pills
Rope tied
Gun loaded
SUICIDE.

Right in the middle of my chest is my heart. It's beating. Since the day I was born. Since the day I met you.

Sometimes you are happy, so I can hear my heart beating in my chest. It wants to break through. It wants you to hear it. It wants you to see it.

Sometimes you are sad, so I can hear my heart beating in my chest. It wants to break through. It wants you to feel loved. It wants you to feel happy.

Sometimes you don't know the way, so I can hear my heart beating in my chest. It wants to break through. It wants to guide you. It wants to be your light.

But you don't care.
You use my heart and beat it up.
You use my heart and leave it.
You use my heart and break it.
You use my heart until it's bleeding, so I can't hear my heart beating in my chest.
It's beating so low.

Am I alive anymore?

13 years on the planet
and I can’t get it right
the personality
the ****** expressions
the life
I can’t get it right
maybe I never will

You’d think I’d be okay by now
But I’m still feeling broken
I feel like I’m the porcelain doll
That the creator just can’t repair