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Woke up in a bliss
I ain't happy about ****
No woman to even kiss on
Let alone call on the phone
Too blister in coming home
Out putting such off in my lungs
No filtler can't hold my tongue
Just started and say she done
Too gone to make her
Absent from absentia mysteriously mistaken as if it's too good to be true
Asking for more than I can chew
Light bill past due
Thoughts of who I could *****
Nostalgic way to take a chance
Just another to day to be a man
Ridiculed for haven't advanced
Keen* proliferate* Unguarded description* masks
Immediately impact in one's direction
Infection spreading airborne it's a feeling
Bias of understanding in saying
Actions speak louder than words
With life there are challenges and achievements
Dispute none of the two what's done is due
Either it's old or new
No need for fued, miss cultivated
Change comes to those that wait
Introduced by patience
CREATED obligate people revise
Things are consistently explain for the moment momentarily
Immediately impact in one's direction.
#life #choices #tortured
Like the unstoppable roach, you cannot approach
Me with nuclear war, the bomb might be enough
To destroy mankind and commandeer an unclear mind
Its just that I became immune to the fallout, I created the antidote
It took time and i'm always perfecting the potion
Every war has a way of spreading a new emotion
I sit in my car for hours lately, I don’t want to go inside
The house I go home to daily isn’t home
It’s drywall, siding, and a couch that me and my home use to cuddle on together
I’ve been home less because I’m homeless right now
With my cardboard box, and Help Me Please Sign
I try to make unorthodox thoughts to re design
my homelessness issue
"It's just not possible at this point in time, to realign
my mind to see loneliness as an opportunity"
I say talking to my therapist next to me
You can tell me the stages of grief, and what I will feel
I just simply cant deal with it.
It bubbles up in my chest like a contaminated effervescent drink.
I can’t rest, I can’t think, existence is inconsistent
I am shaken and going to pop
when in this state of mind
The capitol is anxiety, it’s a city I can’t escape from for to long at a time
Even if I travel away for the day
There is no permanent solution to the strength of this pollution inside of me.
Boredom can cause you to do
horrible,
  dreadful,
    frightful,
     shocking,
       terrible
         things.

That causes hair-raising
and spine-chilling thoughts
to appear in your mind.
Yet they never seem to hurt the bee,
only the bird.
If you want to define love
you are not worth of such beauty.
Because love is not to be defined
just like you can’t describe
the golden thoughts of a crazy lady.

Her shine will forever remain
unspoken amongst the cruel men
who no longer know what to strive for
or what to do with the the puddle of shine.
The length of the silk fabric.  
does not determine the quality.
It may be long,
or it may be shot.

So when you ask me about
the length of my poems
my answer will be
that I want to enjoy every word,
feel every sentence and
appreciate all of the fabric.
I braided my hair
so it wouldn’t
fall into your face
and touch
your smiling lips

When your lips
stoped smiling
then I stoped
braiding
Since they cut
my long heavy
navel string
they too
cut the feeling
of love.

Attachment
was never present
in the same
jointed way
that I once
felt thoroughly.

Then came
one who too
had a
broken heart
who's navel
was fully hallow.  

One who
would use the
navel string
to wrap it
around my neck
till I choked.

I realised
then
that
you made me scared of the word,
love,
because you used it in the wrong way.
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