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Never fall in love with a poet
for their words are sometimes lies
on occasions they're a shield
on occasions a disguise

They will take you on a journey
upon which they bare their soul
in a bid to ease your burdens
in a bid to make you whole

But in every word they choose
for the stories that they tell
lies a little piece of heaven
and a little piece of hell

Tormented souls we poets are
sometimes quite broken and despaired
in search of lost expressions
missed by others who once cared

Never fall in love with a poet
unless you're prepared to share their pain
to hold them close on the darkest nights
over and again
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We’d been together so long, it seemed
That nothing could tear us apart,
We lived our lives in a world of dreams
And Barbara lived in my heart,
But frost had covered the window pane
And then it began to snow,
As Barbara turned, with a look of pain
And said, ‘It’s best that you go.’

I didn’t know what she meant at first
As I looked up from my book,
“Go where?’ I questioned, but thought again
As she quelled my heart with a look.
‘I said I want you to leave,’ she cried,
And her face was set in stone,
‘We’ve come to the end of the path,’ she sighed,
‘I want to be left alone.’

Then suddenly all confusion reined
I didn’t know what to say,
Whatever had brought this mood on her,
I wished it would go away.
But she was firm, and she packed my things
And ushered me out the door,
I stood there shivering in the cold
To be back on my own once more.

I found a flat and I camped the night
There was barely a stick or chair,
I’d have to buy all the furniture
To make it a home in there.
But I sat and cried in the empty room
As the question came back, ‘Why?’
I’d loved her so and my heart was torn,
I thought I wanted to die.

I went to her with my questions, but
She slammed the door in my face,
Whatever love she had had for me
Had vanished, without a trace.
It hurt so much that she cut me off
With never so much as a sigh,
I called that all that I wanted was
To tell me the reason, why?

The roses had bloomed so late that year
Were still in the garden bed,
We’d always tended the bush with joy,
We both loved the colour red,
So I snipped one off as I left one day,
And planted it under her door,
To let her know that I loved her still
I didn’t know how to say more.

Her brother called in a week or so,
Said she was in hospital,
She’d gone in just for a minor cure
And thought that he’d better tell.
So I caught the bus and I went on down
With a quaking fear in my heart,
She hadn’t said there was something wrong
Before she tore us apart.

The doctor came in his long white coat,
His brow and his face was grim,
I said, ‘Don’t tell me the news is bad,’
He said, ‘I’m out on a limb.
Your wife just passed from the surgery,
But she pulled, from under her clothes,
And asked if I’d pass this on to you,’
In his hand was a red, red rose.

David Lewis Paget
 Jun 2016 Trupoetry
Claire Rose
My heart plays hide and go seek
Sometimes to get away,
Sometimes to see if you’ll chase it
Sometimes we sit in the corner
And listen for your footsteps
You’re all “Tell me what hurts”
And “I’m here for you. Patiently.”
And I’m watching you
Out of the corner of my eye
Unsure, uncertain
Waiting for the last straw,
For whatever will push you away
But you’re here now.
You’re still here
And sometimes there’s only an ache
Where my heart is supposed to be
Because it’s busy getting wrapped up in you
I’m getting so wrapped up in you
I'm strung out like
I bought you on the street
And thought
“I’ll try it just this once”
You never try it just once,
I couldn’t try you just once
You’re in my veins,
People can smell you on my clothes
I can’t wash you out of my hair
I can’t scrub your fingerprints off
God and I don’t talk anymore
But if we did
I’d beg him to let me keep you.
 May 2016 Trupoetry
Claire Rose
sometimes things glow a little,
most often when I’m not looking
like little holes poked in my head,
little circles of sunlight shining in a dark place
you let me grasp at you because you are my reality
you hang me around your neck
and many days I would call myself a noose
but you still look at me like I grace your head
and your heart
and the space in between
I’m so heavy, I’m so much,
so much,
so much,
too much.
yet, you carry me.
you hold my cold hands
and kiss them like they don’t break you every night
I want to hold your head in both of my hands
kiss your forehead
your nose
your cheeks
your lips.
let me love your humanity gently.
I see where the outline of your heart is slightly off,
I see where something was erased
and redrawn just a little differently
I see where experience tinged the world for you
and sometimes I just want to take permanent marker
and write
I LOVE YOUR SWEETNESS, I LOVE YOUR IMPERFECTION
on your heart
so many times that
maybe
you start to think that love is a good thing,
that you are a good thing,
a blessing and a pleasure.
I will kiss your knuckles even when you turn them blue and purple.
I am not here to fade away.
I am so tired
and you feel like
the most beautiful, peaceful, permanence.
 May 2016 Trupoetry
Claire Rose
here’s the thing: I never expected to have to let you go.
you were ripped away and here I was memorizing your favorite things so I could surprise you with them, here I was drinking my coffee the same way you drink yours.
it all follows me around, you know.
you follow me.
I can’t go anywhere without running into you.
you know you were the first thing I looked forward to-
I mean really treasured-
in forever.
I talk tough. you haven’t known me long enough to know that.
we’ve all been hurt, and we all use our pain differently.
I built a ******* fortress out of my heartbreak.
half a bottle of ***** later,
I can’t remember why I let you in so quickly.
some part of me really wanted you, I guess.
still does, I guess.
but here I am holding my heart in my ******* hands like a sacrifice.
my heart has better places to be, I hope you know.
I hope you know.
I spend a lot of time trying to talk myself out of you.
I ask other people to talk me out of you.
everyone tells me what I want to hear but it only clears my conscience. my mind is made up.
my idiot mind knows full well what it wants,
my heart knows what it wants,
it seems these days like they’re ganging up on me.
I’m tired of answering for my heart and its recklessness.

I’m not sure what to do with this feeling.
I sit across from it in silence. I drink about it at night.
my heart aches and my brain is disgusted with how easily I let this happen.

Oh, how easily I let you happen.
 May 2016 Trupoetry
Claire Rose
they just won’t shut up about you.
all the little tapping sounds of raindrops on the window,
the leaves shifting
and the world moving on without us.
it doesn’t seem fair.
how dare they all move on without us?
it doesn’t seem right that the sun can rise
like you’re not gone.
how cruel of it to ignore the loss.
even the moon wouldn’t tell me what to do about you.
it looks more and more like I’m in this by myself,
like I’m going to have to dig through all of this myself.
I’m just a little lost, and a lot lonely,
and so stuck on nothing.
that’s the worst part of all of this, I think.
I’m spun up like a hurricane over a lot of nothing.
I’d wait forever for this nothing, though.
maybe that makes it something.
 May 2016 Trupoetry
Claire Rose
something about this is quiet.
it feels as though
I’m in the eye of the hurricane.
everything is swirling around me,
and I can see it all
but it’s so much quieter than it should be.
it’s unsettling.
sometimes people look at you and you can feel it.
you can feel millions of thoughts,
and they’re racing past you
way too quickly for you to keep up with.
I don’t try to keep up anymore.
I’m in the eye of a hurricane
of thoughts and feelings
and I’m taking my time taking in the view.
as long as I can see you, I’m okay.
I’ll be fine, I just need to be able to see you.
something about your steadiness,
something about your consistency.
you are what I look forward to.
would it be alright if i
took the time to uncork my heart
and spill the contents through its narrow spout—
can i pour out my soul to you?
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