I look upon the crowd to see.

So many faces looking back.

All waiting patient just for me.

Only to see just what I lack.

Preparing, widening my stance.

Breathe deep. Inhale, exhale, last glance.

The music starts, this is my chance.

To show them just how well I dance.

Is this what they are looking for.

They look and gaze, I leap and bound.

I do not look for praise, no more.

I look for what cannot be found.

At least not in a crowd, but one.

The quiet calm of on the run.

The calm of solitary fun.

Our love is calm

Like slipping on a warm sweater

Our love is calm

The feel of your cheek in my palm

Staying at home in bad weather

Lighthouse over stormy water

Our love is calm

My mother told me

Don't wander onto

The lake. Barely frozen over

I listened until I saw

The swirls of snow taking flight

So I took small

Cautious

Steps. Listening to the wind whistle

Looking at translucent ice

Feeling the sting of cold

Like sparks dancing over my skin

Until crack

And I saw dark, blue, flowing everything

Struck with awe, I forgot needs

Then I saw blinding white

Felt air in my lungs

Felt my skin burning

I rose

I learned  

Some rules are worth breaking

I know something's wrong
So I try to lose myself in song

It starts when I compare
My shape to the one over there
And I sit and despair

Whenever I hear someone's size
I look and memorize
So later I can beat myself up
For not looking like that in someone's eyes

I hate clothes shopping
Because my clothes are never in the front half of the rack
At home I always end up crying

When I got sick
And my stomach ached
They said to just make myself puke


I froze
I got scared
Because if I did, and I learned how
Who knows how many times
I would use that knowledge

I can see now how your prefer
Her "features", you elegantly called them
Even the inanimate spotlight loves her
She is like a sparkling gem

You put her on such a high shelf
That it makes me doubt myself

She makes me feel so bland
When next to her I stand

But every gem lacks luster
Away from the spotlight she's under

Less sparkle, less clear
If you could see the difference, you would shed a tear

Maybe you would finally see
How she is not so different from me.

Broken hearts break bones
To try and fix broken
Pasts

Winter is breathtaking
Whether from the unbearable cold
Or the sheer beauty
You often can't tell

You can see the first snowflakes
Gently falling
Like shooting stars
You can feel the chill
Right where it is pleasant
When you have a small shiver
A small smile appears

Or you can see the floodgates open
With too many snowflakes to count
Like stars in the full night sky
So many that they smother
Or you can feel the stinging
Cold
The cold that takes your breath
You shiver until you are still
Never to smile again