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Well most days I'm fine
But today I'm not
Mind is trapped inside
Feelings sliced paper thin
Just to fit in
All the cardboard boxes
Neatly labeled but all blank
Words are meaningless
Words have no reason to hide
So I hide
I write it all out
Cuz I won't go outside
The darkness doesn't like the light
And today I feel dark
Most days I'm fine
But today I'm not
//On anxiety, depression//
  Jul 8 Chidera Abaratu
Love is complex;
     it is not fair;
     and is filled with vex.
Love means to dare.

Love is rare;
   it is filled with bliss;
   and happiness making you want to just stare/
Love is best shown with a kiss.

Love is to miss
   someone you adore dearly,
   causing you to reminisce.
Love is to care fiercely.

Love is like the sun,
   especially when it is with your special one.
Trying my first spenserian sonnet
Never whole
since in this hole
I fell
A bottomless well
and since time started here
(when all of time stopped)
this spell
I’m under
makes me not well

The company
I’m in
a grin
One who spins
A tale to weave
of make believe
These items to sell
Story he tells

My brain
set on fire
from his grinning
The maniacal laughter
and madness
I’m tired
I’m mired
Situation is dire

Without choice
he is hired
All thoughts are rewired
Has risen to “Sire”
This liar and thief
Plays *****
and cheats
I’m beat
can not win
Left to stare at that grin
Written: May 28, 2019

All rights reserved.
She misses every bit of him
from his voice
to his playful side and
also his serious side

She loves every bit of him
including his imperfections
and perfections and every other
characteristics that makes him up

His beautiful eyes
Handsome face
His beards that makes
him look older than his age

His raging anger over important things and how he hates it when
he's being posted

She just loves everything
about him from his understanding
caring and lovely character
to his raging anger over important things to his scars of the past
and every other thing both positive
and negative about him

And how he fills  ever part
of her mind and how sensitive
she is over little things like his
Voice which affects her daily
  Feb 25 Chidera Abaratu
in the somber shade
of worn summer nights
hidden were boxes
of summer memories
left to rot in the attic
there’s a fog drifting
through the smokey alley
of memory lane
and words of promises
slowly evaporates
to the empty summer air
i stood there, reminiscing
letting flashbulb images
run through my chaotic heart
a tear falls, and more
as i finally took a step away
from a place we once called
our home
When I wake up in the morning
I think of you
When I see your face every morning a
I see an angel
And that brings me joy
I love your imperfection
You are my life
You are always with me during the bad and good time
I am sorry for those times I did not listen to you.  Which I will try to do more often  all the time
I remind myself everyday you are the best thing that the world will ever have
I will forever appreciate your existence
Who is this person you may ask?
It's me, I love myself
I hope I do not sound selfish
But I do not see any crime in loving myself
This poem wasn't written by me.  It was by a friend Praise
Still at this hour I love you, when sleep removes itself from me.
In the dark I let my mind visit us when we were young, happy, unsoiled by the reality that life would strain and break us.

Early April of 2012 I remember the weekend we spent almost entirely on each other's company. Mostly just talking, knowing each other. Just a few weeks before your birthday and I learned you hated gifts. I miss learning about you. Always missing you.

With all honesty not a day has passed when you haven't come into my mind and heart since we last spoke. Always praying it's not the last time we will have spoken but I know in my heart it is true.

I understand why. But I still love you. And I'm always telling you I'm sorry when we meet in my head. I never wanted to hurt you. Just needed to be needed. I'm a selfish man and I'm sorry I never told you that. I was too young to understand you and too self absorbed to look beyond me.

This is always as far as I get, talking with you in my head. I can neither bear your rejection, nor your forgiveness. So I close my eyes and wish I could hug you. And I start over again...

Still at this hour I love you, when sleep removes itself from me...
//On her//
Just needed to get this off of my heart. But my heart is still heavy. I miss her always.
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