Maybe I didn’t do it right. Maybe I didn’t wait long enough. Time let’s things fall into place, And I wonder sometimes if they could have if I just insisted against the race. I let your eagerness fill me with fear, But I could’ve let my heart be more clear.
It hurts everytime I see you. It hurts knowing I am uncertain. Interest is rare these days, And I often fear the lack of my Judgment due to my idealistic ways. I just hope you know you’re more than enough, I can’t bear the weight of your heart in haze.
It was New Year’s Eve And none of it felt like a dream. I met you just casually, There was no motive, no awkward intrusion, It all happened so naturally. As our day went on, You happened to never leave my side. With a mind so utterly confused, Your presence fulfilled, For having one share a feeling of mine is something I could’ve never refused. You were something new in a sea of it, It’s funny since you brought peace whereas the rest of it brought darkness, You must be a vessel full of righteousness, Oh where are you princess, Are you lost on an island, Are you in a war of nations Are you asleep like me?
As we sat together in the dark, The luminous color giving life to the night, I had never felt so right. But what does it all mean? I mean, Can you take meaning from a faint seam? Because I often look too closely at empty occurrences... But this was different.
Does my motivation lead my potential? Is my fulfillment in the hands of my dreams? I know there’s hope in God, But do I believe the ends don’t justify the means?
I also know I have to share, share what I have to give, or what I’ve been given. If I keep the doors closed to the worlds of who I am, I would be just as treacherous as the man who buried his talents. There must be meaning behind, Something so great. Fantasy is beautiful and has its own power, But my character and past are revealed in truth that won’t cower.
I want to burn the insides, Smoke out the pain of the third time. If this is what it takes to find my place, I don’t know if I can go on. As long as its always you and never me, I’ll be fine, maybe just skip a beat.
I’m sorry I left my fingerprints, I feel like I stole color from your painting. But I still want to visit the museum, I don’t care the price or the length of line. I don’t mind the reconstruction time.
I can’t let go without rejecting part of me or emptying my dreams. My soul won’t let me feel right if I drop hope. So I’ll stay home and keep writing my poems, Until I know the museum is open, ready for tentative visitation and revitalization.
Into this cloud of canvas I could fall, Shaping my emotions like treasures on the wall. Like a deathly hunger I cannot ignore the roar, It deafens with its deceiving grin, So loud in silent reality, So bright in dark decree. Fleeting forests fountaining, feelings flourishing, Sacred sunsets sadly singing salutations. Nimble notes noticed near nassaus nothingness. Is it evil that paints this mural of my heaven? The paint on the inside of my skull never dries, before another coat drenches the lofty skies.
I don’t think the possibility of the emptiness of unfulfilled passions changes the magnetism that radiates from the same possibility of the joy in their fruition.
Is the confidence foolish, Is the necessity folly? But no, all the incantations of my past have yet to ruin me. And despite all of the pain, it doesn’t ruin the lover’s prophecy.
So take my hand, Even if it’s just to examine. So take my eyes, Even if they’re deceived So take my heart, Because I rather have you crush it, then to never see it bend or fold.
But I don’t see your heart the same, No, I want you to be protected with the utmost security, To be free of heart ache even if ruining my name. But I know this doesn’t make sense. The fullness of your heart would experience pain to find the greatest love beyond our game. And the fact that I helped you get there, Well I hope I can find joy through that. Cause all I feel now is an undeserved shame fueled by you...
After leaving your side, and watching you cry, We couldn’t talk or even say goodbye, I still can’t believe after all we went through, That it ended on this mountain we climbed to.
I promise I didn’t care any less about you, I know it was me who walked away, But it still hurt to lose my best friend.
I just wanna be happy for you, Even when I don’t understand, Why we had to end, I just wanna be happy for you, Even when I don’t understand, How to watch you with this man.
I can’t speak for you, but it took me so long move on. Cause all I ever new was simply up and gone.
I hope he gives his best to you, I’ll pray for the future you’ll experience soon. I’m thankful for what I’ve learned, Even through the way things turned, Life is too short to let go of friendships with ease, so I hope you never leave.