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Day 3d
Woke this morning
ready to start
Dream in my eyes
poem in heart

Drank my morning brew,
and now
~it’s not quite right~

Ah well,
Off we go
Day Nov 9
Every sunset
slowly shifts.
The eyes adjust,
as lighting splits.

Reflections,
of moments past,  
light the way.

We are never truly
living in the present.

Always, rushing forward,
Day Nov 2
Spine so curved,
can’t see the sky.
The pavements cracked;
the grass is dry.

Air smells odd,
The sky turned red.
States on fire
burned up the dead.

A mother prays
her child can eat.
A father works
to make ends meet.

The crops have turned
the soil sour.
A church bell turns,
another hour.
Day Oct 19
Bones built with empty tp rolls
Skin scratchy paper
Brain stitched with badly written poems
Veins flowing *****
Eyes rolled with strawberry swishers
Nose bleeding paint
Chest dried out in the sink
//
Feet laying down for the night
Thoughts stain the sheets
\
Oct 19 · 274
dear mom,
Day Oct 19
I know that you love me,  
the way you love a lost part of yourself.

Sometimes, I wonder
if you see
the being I am becoming  

It’s hard to get good sleep
I know that’s why you pray

I don’t believe in God
but,
who am I to say?
Love,
Yours always
Oct 17 · 23
Am i doing this right
Day Oct 17
My dreams are incomprehensible
My thoughts are all a blur
I’m losing my sense of direction
I’m not feeling quite sure
Of myself
Of who I’m trying to be
Days go by and monies gone
I dont know why
It takes so long
And yet so quick
The day is done
Oct 17 · 39
Feelings of relief
Day Oct 17
The *** after holding it for a 2 hour class
Arriving home after a long shift
Getting a negative Coronavirus test
Getting a C on your midterm
Waking up again
Sep 30 · 36
when
Day Sep 30
will I feel balanced again?
Sep 15 · 333
fluid
Day Sep 15
~
s o f t stream
into
raging river
~~~
Is there
purpose
in
your path
?
had this one in my notes for a while. Glad to finally record it <3
Day Aug 24
I got a bit absentminded this year
I guess you could say I was
distracted
,my brain cells turned flaccid,
by the end of the ******* world.
Aug 18 · 20
Passive depression
Day Aug 18
You can change the world,
but you can never fix humanity.
Posting an old draft I found
Aug 18 · 98
Call me, Happy
Day Aug 18
Dear momma,
I changed my name.
You may not recognize my face but,
always I am, yours.
Now you can call me,
Happy.
Day Aug 18
Give me a break
From this everlasting feeling
Of existential dread.

I know its dramatic
But, when will I start healing
From this chaos in my head?

Honestly, I have realized
I’ll just have to keep dealing,
Up until I’m dead.
*I wish I had put more effort into this but here you go.
Day Jun 15
Liquor lubricates my inhibition
I like it
The feeling just between sober and over intoxicated

But
Ive been made aware
That this is not sustainable

Eventually
The trauma catches up

Self harm
Comes in many forms
Day Jun 14
Spent the last 5 years
Forgetting
To make a therapist appointment
Self diagnosed myself
A couple times over
Muted myself
With medication
And YouTube recommendations
I put off
Writing a love letter
To my best friend
Sigh
To what could have been

Still
I’m happy

Not all the time
Of course
But,
Enough.
Day May 24
It’s just not healthy to keep your mind up past its capacity.
As romanticized as 4am is, you brain will lose elasticity.
Just give it up and go close your eyes.
Save your energy for the sunrise.
May 24 · 38
BS
Day May 24
BS
MY MIND
is bursting and I am growing frustrated. I am losing the ability to communicate. I am sitting in darkness and my words are worthless. Thoughts scroll and scream without meaning. It’s almost 4 am here in some random world location. Inside my head I wonder what is happening on the exact other side. The SUN shines bright somewhere as I sit in shadows. What has meaning? What has value? IS life subjective to where you sit? So many thoughts attack my being. But does it matter?
Mar 21 · 950
Mis(sed)communication
Day Mar 21
Did you know I loved you
when you left, last fall?
I didn't tell you
but, I thought you saw.
Now, you're not that far
still you never call.

I'm happy now
well, I want to be.

Sometimes, I wonder
do you think of me?
Day Mar 12
roses are red
just like my iris'
wait, ****, is this
Coronavirus?
*I know the coronavirus is serious!! Just putting some humor out there :) be safe and healthy all
Day Mar 12
haven't you people ever heard of

washing your ******* hands?

No!
it's much better to face these kinds of things
with mass frenzy over-rationing!
I know coronavirus is serious!!! But ofc I gotta put some humor out there :)
Mar 11 · 419
binary
Day Mar 11
maybe,
we
are
just
this
way,
incompatible.
Day Feb 26
do you ever feel
like a *******
rotting on the earth
waiting
for your rebirth
Feb 17 · 108
a question for the ages
Day Feb 17
will we ever finally stop and just settle on "generation - doomed to do the exact same things our parents did" ?
Dec 2019 · 141
Television is Media
Day Dec 2019
Do what I say
In your own way
Oh, what irony
That I control reality.
Dec 2019 · 320
cringe
Day Dec 2019
type a poem
hit delete

try again
on repeat

final one
til defeat

posted it
uncomplete ...
Nov 2019 · 983
Framed
Day Nov 2019
Quick,
take a pic
or maybe, 26!

Show my smile.
Stay still for a mile.

A picture's worth
a thousand words
but,
I don't have
a clever caption.
I almost hit a homeless man with my car while scrolling #haha #irony #firstworldproblems
Nov 2019 · 233
I'm not a poet
Day Nov 2019
I am a fraud
4 years later
still ain't found god.

my brain stopped
searching
for words to say

my head don't bow
and
I will not pray

my heart fell silent
and never
returned


I'm not a poet
but, I am more
learned.
Sep 2019 · 183
lovers grave
Day Sep 2019
Let's be buried in our favorite cuddle position,
you can be my little spoon.
We'll find the best spot for our decomposition
with a perfect view of the moon.

Sometimes, I am scared of the close
of this happy life with you.
But, our souls will start again I suppose
a story all anew.
Aug 2019 · 251
superpower self confidence
Day Aug 2019
I want to be invisible
but, really what I mean
is
I want to be okay
with the way that I am seen.
#socialanxiety #social #peace
Aug 2019 · 178
Haircut
Day Aug 2019
What is the definition of myself?
A modpodge rendition of a pinterest post I saw?
A poem I wrote drunk off my ***?
A half-hearted rhyme I can't tie tother?
This is not a poem. It's my life.
Day Aug 2019
I feel like a crossword puzzle puked in my brain,
jumbled thoughts on a trackless train.
I'm trying to sort through this emotional pain
but, I'm not even sure there is something to gain.
Day Jul 2019
First thing
I noticed,

camped
and
homeless
but, you found
a place
to call home.

Man*,

Are you
content
to
scavenge and
roam?

Is my question
intrusive?
Should I just
stay mute?
I can't help
but look over,
while on my
commute.
Jul 2019 · 225
Dissociate's Degree
Day Jul 2019
How am I supposed to plan a future?
When, I don't even know
who the **** I am today.
Jun 2019 · 523
depends on the mood
Day Jun 2019
which is worse?
no-one or everyone
understanding
how it feels
Day Jun 2019
brain's running on a train track
destination's outta wack
no station in sight
breaks off left and right
no telling
where my mind
will go
a quickly typed out poem about my adult struggle with ADHD
Jun 2019 · 90
dizzy day
Day Jun 2019
It's hard to pause thoughts twirling
when lady earth just keeps on swirling.
Try to keep my head in the air,
but if I fall,
why should she care?
Day May 2019
or does she just
feel their cry?

Never could ask
them why.

Just wait around
to dry.

Maybe next time,
she'll say
high.
playing in my thoughts tonight
Day May 2019
I tasted you,
but then I came to the realization
that paying for my demise
made me
a poor* ******* idiot.
*literally
May 2019 · 860
my name is a noun
Day May 2019
Racing arms and angry sneakers in a concrete hallway -
my heart beat.

I feel my feet.

"This is the floor." I tell myself,

in auto speak.

Who are you?

I am running.
I can't tell if this one will make sense to anyone but me.
Apr 2019 · 237
Mom said
Day Apr 2019
"Don't be Daysha, she acts like the devil." to my sis,
but, I have never felt Satan's dark and humid kiss.
Only to myself, have I attempted to be true.
So, a message to little sister , "Please, just be you."
I need to be writing. Time slips by me, but I am trying to scoop it up again. Re-finding the things that drive me to be alive is truly a neverending adventure.
Apr 2019 · 177
trapped
Day Apr 2019
No reason to stay,
but no place to go.
P l e a s e, go away,
I wanna lay low.
"Can't stop", they say.
Whatever, I know.
Day after day,
the clock's running slow.
Got bills to pay,
turn this body on auto.
Apr 2019 · 121
is this is my life?
Day Apr 2019
Eyes open
Phones broken
Alarms on
Cars warm
Show up
Clock in
Do my work
Get paid
Clock out
Drive home
Feel drained
Close my eyes
Can't express
How I feel
Do I feel?
Sigh
Breathe in
Breathe out
Sleep
Feb 2019 · 563
behind these words
Day Feb 2019
Why why why why why
why am why why why
why why I why why
why why why hiding why
why why why why ?
a constant mind game I play
Day Feb 2019
I'm sad because no one likes me
No one likes me because I'm an alcoholic
I'm an alcoholic because I'm dead inside
I'm dead inside because I've been hurt
I've been hurt because I am weak
I am weak because I love everyone
I love everyone because no one loves me
No one loves me because I'm unlovable
I'm unlovable because I am broken
I am broken because someone broke me
Someone broke me because I left them
I let them because I loved them
I loved them because I am naive
I am naive because I trusted them
I trusted them because I was ignorant
I was ignorant because no one taught me
No one taught me because no one was there
No one was there because no one likes me
No one likes me because I'm an alcoholic
I'm an alcoholic because I am dead inside
I am dead inside because I am sad
a poem written by my friend Jeff - posted with their permission.
Wanted to share his words with you all
Day Jan 2019
God?

I thought I heard you today,
in the voice of a man
asking me for a cigarette.
A nineteen degree request;
faint on a cold, city street.
A memory of Sunday story
caught me off guard.
" Silver and gold have I none;
but such as I have give I thee."
I've since stopped attending
my scheduled worshiping.
Long forgot,
about an un-kindled burden,
but today I wondered,
are you still here?
Day Jan 2019
Secrets, secrets, I know you keep.
Surely not meant to make me weep.
Open emails and a curious eye,
I told myself not to pry.
Calm myself, and clear my head,
some things are better left unread.
Anger came and then she passed,
force these lips to not speak fast.
Thinking "Maybe this will help me out,
He doesn't know about my doubt."
Suddenly have the upper hand,
now I have a chance to stand.
Both have things that we don't share,
who am I, to say what's fair?
I still think what we have is real
but, can't get past the things I feel.
With a kiss, push these thoughts away,
"Morning, lover, have a wonderful day."
Here's to the start of another week,
I've honestly been feeling less bleak.
I don't know why it's been easier lately,
but I'm not here to complain :)
Jan 2019 · 3.3k
1-800-Suicide
Day Jan 2019
Just a nameless voice on a busy line,
but what makes me worth your time?
Jan 2019 · 439
And vice versa
Day Jan 2019
React with kindness
Respond with honesty
Jan 2019 · 355
F*CK this rage
Day Jan 2019
HELP WANTED
Looking for a better weapon to fight this vulnerability
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