I'm over reacting
It was nothing
Nothing but fear
Powerless fear
Please laugh
Ask me why I hate him
Because you don't understand
I hate him because he taught me the realist lesson I've ever had to learn
I hate him because I believed in good
I saw the best
I overlooked
But he taught me
He taught me that people are not good
People are not pure
I was unaware
He's nice
He's kind
I told myself
I'm just a kid there's no way he's looking at me like that
Danger wasn't real before him
The men my parents warned me about were distant
Not family friends
Not under my nose
I believed that his eyes were looking at my shirt
I believed that the slips of his hands were accidents
I believed that the lingering hugs,
the midnight phone calls, and the constant stares meant nothing
He was the first person to ever look at me like that
I didn't understand
I was young
Whatever weird feeling I got couldn't have been real
It wasn't real I told myself
But his anger was real
When I didn't answer his phone calls
When I squirmed away from his touch
His anger was very real
When he grabbed my arm
When he didn't let me leave
My terror was real
When I finally realized the possibilities that could occur behind the closed door
My tears were real
When he touched me and I ran
But nothing happened
So my chest shouldn't get tight when he walks into a room
Nothing happened
So I shouldn't care
So yeah laugh
It's nothing
I'm nothing