*really, Really, REALLY
mad at God.*

*But I'm not going to **** myself, so don't worry. I'm just sick of life. It *****.*


*The above with the Asteriisks is not going to be taken down. It is how I felt at the time. At 8 p.m. I was going through the darkest night of the soul. I had run out of options. Literally. I didn't want to put up another writing, because I wanted to stay off site. But doing that writing worked out something in me. No. I did not drink or use. I faced the pain. I did not run. I wrestled with God, and He finally won. He always does. He's putting me through the fire for a reason. I really don't understand what that is yet, but there must be something good for the devil to be fighting this strongly! So I'm just hanging on. And I will have joy!

If anyone is going through real hardship like I was, just know that better days are ahead. Wrestle with God. He wants us to lay our fiercest anger at the altar. He's got big shoulders, and he can handle it. But don't die! That's like cutting your nose off to spite your face... And the end of that is more terrible than you could possibly imagine! Trust God! He will never disappoint, nor let you down. If you don't know how to accept him, go to a good bible-believing church and ask one of the elders for help. Your new life may have begun!

I'm alright. Just goin off site for a while. Be blessed everyone! Have a very merry Christmas!

Thanks again Hello Poetry!

It's 12:30... time for shut eye... =_=

Goodnight all!

-

The Dream Flight is for WWII vets
Who would ordinarily never be able
To afford to visit the Washington Memorial of WWII... it is an all expenses paid flight and hotel then a magnificent ceremony at the Memorial. My brother will be standing by his 90 year old
Father throughout everything...
Which is heroic in itself as my dad is almost stone deaf and in a wheelchair. He will need some assistance!!!

THIS IS HISTORY IN THE MAKING!

I AM SO PROUD OF MY FATHER
(in case you hadn't guessed)

Thanks for welcoming me back to Hello Poetry... you are wonderful friends.

I have been going through some things visceral. But feeling better every day. The cup is half full, yes??

----!

Something I read tonight really disturbed me. And I feel it is necessary to explain why I am not on site as much as I'd like to be. I am reposting this on Twitter and Facebook also, as I have not been on those sites in many months. I have friends there I have almost literally abandoned, except in prayer.

I'm afraid to say I am in constant pain, my friends. I have severe arthritis in my knees and feet. My feet are literally deformed. And walking is extremely painful. I am not in a power chair. I don't want to go that route. I don't want to lose the use of my lower body entirely. I can't get surgery on either my knees or my feet because I have a problem with my weight which was brought on by medication I was given which I never needed.

I am also a targeted individual. I have been singled out by the Church of Scientology for extreme mental torture. They do this to certain people who are vocal against them. I am one. I was put in the mental health system because they wanted to discredit me. They have almost completely tarnished my name. And I have no recourse because I am labeled mentally ill.

I live in a house that should be condemned. The electrical system has not been fixed since the 1920s. It is a beautiful old house, but in great need of repair. I am constantly on guard for fire.

My father is in the hospital. He is in a deep depression because of his physical condition. He was always very active in his life. He is a Master Gardener but now cannot do the things he loves. He is completely deaf, and nearly blind. Now he cannot speak. He has a tracheostomy and a feeding tube in his stomach. He considers his life a living death. I don't know what to do for him except to pray.

Yes, I have many troubles. But I consider none of them a comparison to the glory I will experience when I get to heaven to be with Jesus. What he does for me even in this life is nothing short of miraculous. Even with all these troubles above I am joyous. I cannot do the things that I wish to do. I find it hard to follow my friends on the various sites mentioned above. And I do feel sorry for that. I have thought carefully about which site to follow. Because I love poetry and the poets on Hello Poetry, and they are my oldest friends, I have decided to stay here. I'm not able to read as much as I'd like, but that is no fault of theirs. I want to thank those who follow me through all this from the bottom of my heart. You bring me a great deal of Joy to my life.

My life is actually very full. I have friends who I talk to, and pray with, on the phone. Because I am essentially a shut in, this is very important. I can't go to church for the above reasons. Everywhere I go my name is being slandered by this nefarious cult. But my friends, who I've had for many years some of them, know that what is said about me to be lies. We talk and we pray for hours. I pray for all of you. Usually I would not mention my prayer life. It is something very personal to me, as it should be. but I just want you to know how much I love you all.

I say none of this for sympathy. That word is between s*** and syphilis in the dictionary. I simply say that Jesus Christ is literally saved my life. There is no way I could endure any of this if it weren't for Him. I sincerely hope that some of you can find the joy that I experience. It is only through great suffering that one finds this kind of happiness. Please read the Bible quote below. Thank you all for reading!

"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."

2 Corinthians 4:16-18

This was written of Scientology
but is applicable to any ungodly mindset.

Inspired by Megan H

-

Don't get me wrong.
I don't like nor want to diss ANYONE.
But "political correctness" has gotten
really over the top.
The only group it seems "correct"
to diss are Christians. I guess in
some instances we have it coming.
But we are automatically put in the
category of greedy, lustful, crazy, ignorant (or downright stupid)
INTOLERANT HYPOCRITES.

What happens when you point
the finger? Yep. You got it.

---

To a very dear friend who has always helped me to understand the Bible and its correlation to every aspect of life. She has been a wonderful support in every way. I believe the armor bearer is more important than the warrior. This lady has a TRUE servant's heart... she is dearly LOVED!

Have a wonderful Sunday!

Today is my sister's
Anniversary. Married over
30 years! I'm going to be busy
Making their present, and going
To the party we arranged for
Them... I will try to read tonight.
Thanks for understanding!

♡♡ God bless! ♡♡

The more chaos
The more darkened
Society becomes.

The only thing keeping
The wolf from our door
Is the fact that we have
Already let it in.

~~~^♥^~~~

Thanks to Poetic T for the inspiration

~~~^♥^~~~

Kirstie. I don't judge nor condemn you.
But there ARE a LOT of folks who think

YOU NEED TO CLEAN UP YOUR ACT.

You're promoting the most destructive Cult
IN HUMAN HISTORY. TAKE RESPONSIBILITY!

So. You're OT VII. SO WHAT?
How're you feeling INSIDE?

DON'T LISTEN TO THAT LITTLE MAGGOT.

YOU ARE ON THE WRONG SIDE!

I will not reveal what is behind this angst. I don't want to talk about satan and his works. I have a great and lovely God. I want to give Him the glory. He could change my current situation. Turn it on a dime. I choose to have faith that He will do that.

'Nuf said.

I've decided to present my story on social media. There is NO TIME TO WASTE. There are hundreds, perhaps THOUSANDS of perfectly SANE people in the mental health system, perhaps in hospitals... even PRISONS for the CRIMINALLY INSANE who need for this story to GET OUT.

I'm probably throwing myself under the bus. I don't CARE. THE PEOPLE NEED ME. AND THEY NEED Y O U.

SHARE THIS. REPOST IT. RETWEET IT.
IT NEEDS TO GO V I R A L!!!

You will see before and after targeting photos of me on Twitter and Facebook.  The names I go by are SoulSurvivor II and Cathy Jarvis respectively.

I'm sorry,  but I must be working on this 24/7. I have no time to read or write poetry.  It is SO IMPORTANT that I get this done quickly. The "Powers That Be" WILL want to silence me. I want it DONE before that happens. Thanks for understanding!

♡♡♡ I LOVE YOU! ♡♡♡

Sincerely
Catherine Jarvis

This is a true story. It made the paper the next day. Arizona Daily Star in 1973. They chided me about getting in that van. But the way I got out of the situation by the seat of my pants and my wits impressed them. Don't be afraid to fight! But use your head first!

Kimberly had gotten out of the situation unscathed also... At that point he had left the window the van open and she jumped out of it! LOL!

Thanks for reading this long story. And always remember, if you are a teenager (and even if you're not), to be very wary of strangers. This internet can also harbor horrible people. So BE CAREFUL!

This is the second in my series on
The "Church" of Scientology.

I was a member. Actually on staff.
Recruited at the age of 17
(a KID... what did I know?)
It was a descision that would, eventually,
almost RUIN MY LIFE!

Therefore I'm WARNING PEOPLE.

-

I've been rather melancholy lately.
sorry it's taking me so long to read....

"""@,,,,,

Inspired by Papaya's "Iron Cage Birdhouse"

A true JOY working with Frank.
He gave her the final SAY!  Lol!

"Vengence is mine, sayeth the Lord.
I will repay."

---