She feels like she is in the center of it all
Between the chaos and the peace she longs for
The day when she can close her eyes and shut out the noise
the days of joy that went past her as the minute hand races pass the hour we all hope would last a few minutes longer

She filled with peace but in her peace there is so much pain
I would know I listen to her when she decides to share her story
Her story is not the story of a princess and the prince
But I admire the determination cause once in a while she tell me that she too will eventually get her happy ending
That the hell hole that she is currently facing will be a thing of the past
She has a smile of the early morning sunrise
In her story even when she seems beaten and bruised
She still wants to fight
She gets up every morning to a battle and goes to sleep in her armour
I have to wonder if she sleeps most of her days

But am only a visitor thanks to her
Just like many others before It is only due to her kindness
Even though others were quick to voice their opinion about how they would do if they were in her shoes
I just do not think her story is for me to edit but to rather keep my thoughts to myself
I listen

It's a party where all the guests are young and wild
                       The night is still young

                   Drink until your problems drown the pressure of the alcohol level

The night is still young
Make it a  night to remember dance until you  you feet spark flame from your deepest desires that are boiling up inside your chest

Let's have a hell of a night even if the fire might be too much there can never be too much alcohol

                         Thoughts that have the tendency to make you question yourself should go for a swim

                         Take another pill cause it's all the healing you need for tonight
                                        Stay awake cause a wishing star is passing by to promise you that can always get better

It's your life , you don't owe it to no one
Take a pull to pull yourself out of the worries

                       Get high
We can lend you wings to reach for the heavens
Take a sit for you are gods and goddesses

You don't need when you go
Why leave when you still got moves for the crowd
              You can be a freak

                      It's a party so get wasted till you drop

Curfews are for the chosen few
The bottle and drugs will solve your problems

                        That extra puah to get you started
They'll never understand you
You don't need to know why your here just know your not lost

               There's nothing we don't have here

            Your favourite posion is at the table

Razer's are available open up we won't judge
Make mistakes until you gain experience not scars cause you fell to many times
Take the weight 9ff and rest
Your tired , drained  and put your feet up

              The sun is always shining cause it's a cold world outside

        The outburst of kIds are evident from the popped balloons

              So just put on your mask so no one can know the real you





.

You left me
You left ,never answered when I called out  your name
I screamed the cry of a thousand vultures
A thousand voices that were escorted by three  words  which said "stay with me "

            Maybe you didn't hear me ,how could I   have you on speed dial but you ran I needed the most

You don't pick up when I call ,I slipped on a banana republic while wearing my Pjs

You always warn me that leave when you don't get your way

I never understood how you could  hold your chin up and leave when someone needed you the most

Your a song that is great but you end while it was getting good

          I won't force things if you want to leave than all I can do is watch you  walk into whatever sunset is ahead of you and I'll deal with the aftermath

       Its just tragic that blood is boiling jumping out the *** hot as particles of oil striking against the eyes

But you can't choose me when it suits you

I  would be lying  if I said I don't regret not fighting for you

          I would lying if I said  I didn't  have  a little bit of resentment for choosing your friend  to have the love that was reserved for you  

When I was with you, I  understood what it meant to to put your heart into the air and risk it being shot down

Didn't what I  had to share worth fighting for

Why did you have to be the selfless one
You put her first and I admired that about you

But couldn't you see you put me second  

It was like being sampled out of a Dark Twisted Fantasy  

You ran away from fighting for a  chance to be  with me

All the times we spent talking seemed like Autumn  leaves blown away with wind

How come I felt cold like its the beginning of July  but the snow lost its magic

       I blamed myself for not fighting hard enough

        I was not happy with  your choice but I felt I  had no right to obligate

Didn't you consider my feelings  

       I lost something I had wanted so bad ,  and that was a chance to belong

How could you make belong  to you and disown like I wasn't much  

You
The one I felt tried to meet halfway  

With a smile that uplifted the joy I had inside me

You were a rainbow and me little kid who just wanted to live near it

But I sank like the titanic when I found out you took him back

      I saw my future with you  
       I should've got new lenses cause I didn't see this swip and swap going well

          I froze like Leonardo DICaprio  giving up his life to save Kate on a raft

The love drifted away

          I had to let go cause it seemed like that's what you wanted

And your happiness was what  gave me life

Your happiness was the Sun and I was a sunflower

The iceberg broke , while my  heart froze

      I had expected it to break but it froze and sunk into black hole where it refused to feel

But it burnt with agony cause                           I couldn't take how he  treated you

         I felt like I  lost you not fearing to break bones wanted the wall to feel my pain

And I heard about your birthday invitation for a second my heart jumped for joy but than the  brain warned my heart that the sight of her in another's arms will eventually lead to brawl

    I  wanted to see you but not with someone else

     I couldn't bare to lose to someone who wanted you for the time being

      I  wanted you for all eternity




     I guess I'm grown now  
     I always went in the fields and hunted for love

Now I learned that sometimes you have to let love find you in the field
           So I sit and wait
     I wanted to say thank you for  giving  your time

For making me belong
        I don't regret anything about those moments

Even if it was a  long time

We all come from the root of one book but each has their own chapter and path

All embarking on a journey to find the true meaning of life

Through the blazing storm concealed with misfortune for most walking the path

Some be trying to numb the idea of being alive cause of the wait of carrying a dead body inside

Celebrating death like its a festive season

Growing up trying to find something our forefathers seems to have lost

Hiding from reality
That life is forever changing and unknown to us

While seeking for a better life that all this pain we feel is a dream most wished  they never had .

If there was faith ,Demons wouldn't have a place to stand

If the was faith we would not be blind to the lies of the  world

If there was faith where would I be

What is faith is the first question for my  reason that I lack faith
If is just a word presumably  preferred in children's book placing the hopes and desire on their own illusion

Ask for a little water while you're in hell

I don't  think  on  this  earth  there's  perfect  partner  for me even if he was there  I dont think he will  be part  of my life  .  Phemelo Sparkling Dime

We so young but we're  afraid to feel anything
Numb to the belief that the universe set out a script  that inspired the stories of  Cupit to aim for the stars  instead struck a heart  

Lonely and sad waiting on a glimpse of a chance  
That the universe will aline and find what you're looking for

Setting the scenario for two people to catch eye contact with one another souls in the middle of the mass

Buzzing with busy people caught up  in their own problems to care

In the middle of that sand of confusion
Everything makes senses

That nothing else matters  except for this moment

The gruesome truth is that in a generation of emotionless  people  moving  through the  motions
Is that angels fall and cupit is drunk on his love affairs  

Possibility of him aiming  for the stars is a misconception instead his arrow landed on our eyes  leaving us blind

Call it falling  in love
Maybe we just fear to let  go of  our  hearts  and watch it fall  to the ground of eternal pain and break

Soul mates who mated with the souls of others leaving them hurt , broken and in pain  trying to pass on the the pain to other  so they can feel the same heartbreak saying they have feelings
Looting each other like sells men of  deception in the name  of love

Filled with greed and envy cursing love cause we don't love we know the pain from wanting it and never receiving  it

Using each other in order to fulfil ones needs while tearing each other apart  in the process

While Cupit watches from his  one room   apartment   drinking his poison watching us film ******* instead of making  love

Hoping we feel the pain cause he also loved someone but forever was just a name

The stars sparkle and a shine in the dark void of  the universe

Writing love letters to one another to remind them that they will never be alone

Reaching for one another
True love seems so distant to me
Is the universe mocking me
Making a joke of me
Something to be laught at

Am I not worthy of love
Nature has the rain to remind it that the clouds form together a partnership to give it a reason to love this misarable life that does more damage  than good to it

Than why does dark clouds  float over  me raining  questions upon questions

Who am I to hold the answers to this pain

The one thing I want so bad  is not good to me

Associated with loneliness as if my heart has found a new relationship with lonesome  days

Don't I deserve to be a reason whatever it may be to be someone's one and only

Only  to realise  that I'm all alone, sad and without love

I used to say I know myself so I could judge myself
Now I am what I am

I am the centre of my own universe Instilled with alter egos that bring forth a pain that's hidden in a place where it  can not be found

Just like the moon a servant of this world but somewhere I am a tin god that brings light to someone dark path where no hope is found .

Mirrors
Face paint and mirrors would make the fairy tale more believable

Mirror on the wall can you see that the walls around you are about to crash and fall
Not one to break a sweat ,you've been known for breaking human logic
Dissembled on the ground
It just my seven years of bad luck.

Mirror on the wall tell me it will be fine
A smile that can last a little longer ,but a happy frown just don't stand a chance faced with you.

Mirror, Mirror on the wall ,tell me  one day I will know how it is to feel again
Pain leaves one numb after a while of feeling too much

Mirror on the wall, do you see that I am about to explode
Choices are just a ticking time bomb

Mirror ,Mirror on the wall she claimed to have saved me but I am still falling
Now that you are broken into pieces, my blessings that reflected the peace you reflected on me have vanished.

She wants to be a star
She wants the fame but can't afford the time climbing up the ladder
So the stars is what she's after
She'll tell you that time is the Being hidden inside Death's cloak
She's on prescription but who am I to tell her stop
The glitz and glamour is a selfish human ambition on the other side of the the mirror
Because stars rain from the sky and burn up because they weren't able to fufill the dream
Maybe because we only gave only half a loaf
We offer it as a sacrifice

You said you want a guy who can take you place
The promises of modeling deals from strangers
Who are Wolves trying to sound like sheep
How pitiful

But I wanted a different star
I wanted the West kind of star
I wanted a ***** dish kind of actress
With body measurements that screamed gorgeous everytime time I lay my eyes on you
With hazel blues eyes to match her description
Can't believe the iris determines the color of the beautiful blue ocean that God has gifted you with
With a bust size of 112cm
Just like Solomon,I'm wise enough to give praise for every part I consider gold
Rose Gold is the type of flower I would pick
If we had to measure up to our perfection l wouldn't stand a chance
Cause she's 5 ft 5 / 165 in cm
She so beautiful that they pay her to do ***** dishes
All I wanted was a Libra,
Just to see if I can connect with the stars

Let me run with the runaways
Chasing the paper while my enemies are right behind
Were on a mision to disobey
Break all the rules and keep the ones we like
Like coming  back at my own time
Even though im still a child
Cause i think im old enough
How wrong am i
Walking into the unknown like i know
What i know you've known for a long time
But i think i know better
Late nights of unknown dreams
2A.M is the time of the nights i spend thinking about you
That i cant be my own man until i get my own  house
That I own no man's daughter unless i put a ring on her finger
That passage walking is why clean dudes  get robbed
Dangerous ****** like to grab and hold
With a grip strong as a lion's jaw
But i am slippery like a frog i'll find a way to escape
That I walk far away from these wall during dawn
Cause they can  turn those walls into a cage
Surrounde  by gang
People who want what they want
Even life is not guaranteed
So what ever price you have in your pocket
Just hand it over
They prefer to walk in a pack
Wolves ready to jump on an opportunity
Any one who looks innocent could be next in line
With nice kicks ,that tells everything about  where his from
So dodgy areas aint the place to be singing about sunshine and rainbows

With a pure heart  ,I can greet you
But with a ***** mind i can decieve you
My best poems are written after midnight
Where only sinners know
Demons using their souls as a 9-5

Listening to cars where driving is a man's 9-5

He who drive is in danger
But those who walk have seen death a thousand
For a thousand lives that never came home .

Hats off to the honest truth cause I can't deal with the lies that I'm okay cause I'm not.

I'm afraid like a little kid in the dark so I have to **** Micky Mouse ,because I have to grow up hoping the pain will go away. I can't face the mirror without seeing a frown.
So yeah I'm a sad clown who never got the chance to cry .Its painful to be in this position ,stuck in the mud having to dance to their tune of suicidal thoughts as if I'm losing my mind to my demons sleepless nights of rotten teeth ,as they watch me in pain and laugh .
Its hard to see God in the struggle,what's **** to my problems and demons they all seem the same, Trying not to sink under the pressure with cold feet.

Were just misfits trying to figure out how to fit into the grown up world. This year has been Hell for me ,today seems to  be the worst .I want to rise up but I don't see the sunrise but I love the moon but at the moment I need some vitamin D. Not to say that he's won but it's better than what?
Drugs ...not at the moment cause I'm might be already dead .

I want to learn how to love her ,but I might lose her among the stars cause I lost focus and it scares me more than anything.
Cause I lost Micky Mouse trying to find her but I found your crown Queen cause you rule my heart .I'm losing words but I have every reason to tell you "you mean the world to me, even if I don't own the world."

Popping pills in the Club House and let me dance to the pain till it goes away ,let the rain wash away my pain cause were just a depressed generation so I kind of understand.