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Lemon Aug 2020
Do you not want me anymore?
Have I become too much of a bore?
Have I tired you out with the constant text?
Or did I not show you enough affection?

Please tell me why it is my texts are unanswered.
Why do you reply to all the comments but mine?
Am I not what you want anymore?
Have I lost the attention I adored?

Is the love all gone?
Dried up in the sand.
Am I nolonger the woman you wish to hold hands?
Have you moved on to someone new?
Or has someone old come back for you?

Please just tell me the truth,
Because nothing can hurt me as much as you.
You hold my heart in your hand,
And I know I should give up,
But I refused,
I will stand.
My love for you will not be dormant.
It will not hide away.
So crush me now or let us be okay.
I just need go know the answer before it's too late.

I know it's toxic,
I know I'll end up hurt,
But I love you more than I love myself,
So I'll endure.
Till the bitter end,
When I can feel no more.
I'll love you forever and always,
But I fear your love is only temporary,
And it will surly fade,
Just like my face.
Lemon May 2020
I'm a mess,
thought it was new but its the same old ****,
Same old brain,
Same old body,
Same old failures,
And same old fears,
Same ******* tears.
Will they ever stop flowing?
The answer is no.
Will I ever move on?
Will I ever love who I am?
Sick of feeling sick,
Of being in pain,
Sick of existing this way.
Sick of making myself fade away,
Yet I keep doing it every single day.
Lifes a game,
And im on my last life,
Losing every battle,
Losing my mind.
In the end all I'll be is insane.
Lemon Feb 2020
She says don't get too attached
       Don't let him have your heart
Don't trust his words or actions
       Don't let him tear you apart
Don't let yourself love
       Don't let yourself live
Hide behind my rules
       And don't dare disobey
For you'll only get hurt
       And get lost on the way
Don't make me pick you up
       And clean up the mess
He'll only hurt you
       And cause distress

But little does she know
       I've already fallen in too deep
Past the point of return
       Always and forever we will be
And if not?
       Well then we're not all I thought us to be
But nothing is perfect
        Or goes according to plan
I'm just rolling with the tides
        And letting our love guide me
Till the end
Lemon Feb 2020
Slowly but surely,
I drive you insane,
then I poison your body,
and do it all over again.
Lemon Feb 2020
I used to dream of happiness
Of having a good life

But now all I want
Is to truly feel alive
Lemon Feb 2020
I'm tired

Tired of being sad

Tired of feeling angry

I'm tired of lying awake in bed feeling lonely

I'm just an empty pit

Trapped in a cycle of nothingness

No point no use

No way to move on

I'm tired I say

I didn't get enough sleep

Cause the lingering thought of you holding me

It leaves me longing

I do not sleep because I do not trust

That I am safe in this home

In this monstrous world

I do not sleep because I am afraid

But being awake I grow closer to losing myself

Losing my mind and my hope

I'm scared of who I've become

And what will happen with more restless nights

So yes

I'm tired

And I'm losing my fight
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