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Sep 14 · 28
Destiny or Fate
I once was asked
" what's the difference between destiny and fate"
One just is
And the other we create
Sep 8 · 271
Crimson & Over
I wear my heart on my sleeve
Right where I cut
Right where I bleed
Aug 26 · 42
Love Killer
Your the bullet in my gun
The poison in my punch
The noose in my rope
The gag in my throat
The dope in my spoon
The reason for my gloom
The gas in my inhalants
My number 1 assailant
The ties that bind me
The one who confined me
The reason for my insanity
The one who don't want me
But won't set me free
You are the OJ glove
But most of all
You are the
Killer of my love
Aug 25 · 28
Black Hole
Out of this hole and into the sun,
Something I've imagined but never have done
Aug 25 · 32
Busted
Friend:  'Has your heart ever been broken'

Me: 'You mean has it ever been fixed'
Aug 25 · 65
Silence has a Sound
The silence between us has deafened
My ears, deepened my fears and drowned my cheeks in tears
Aug 25 · 163
Bathed & Slashed
Backlash
Bent in half
Never smile
Never laugh
Sit in the tub
A ****** bath
body takes
It's last slash
Aug 25 · 55
Peter Pan's Web
Like a spider and it's web
Stuck in what you spun
And left for dead
Aug 25 · 37
P.S.
You must love yourself first.
Aug 25 · 26
Lovin' on E
Nothing comes easy
Nor ever will
Always feel empty
With or without you
Nobody can fulfill me
Even if they tried
For I'm already dead
On the inside
Aug 25 · 25
Hot Pursuit
Run!
And off you go
Looking for a different **
Once the chase is over he's on the run again.
Can't commit because you aren't a real man
And never was a friend
Aug 25 · 304
Story of my life
I can't wait to be ashamed of what I do This weekend
Obviously I didn't write this but this saying cracks me up!
Aug 19 · 35
Hangry
Savannah was drunk in my apartment once, she threw her hungry man against the wall
Now she's
The hungriest
One of all
Written by one of my bestest friends
And father of my Son
Aug 19 · 30
Pursuit of Hazziness
You only see what we show
Life sometimes really blows
We all are fake
You ought to know
You only know
The life we show
Aug 19 · 30
Facebook Friendly
You see me laugh
You see me smile
Hear my jokes
Crack a smile
From the outside looking in
You think I'm friendly
live a good life
Im the pretty, happy wife
Then night falls
we settle in
close our doors
Shut out the world
you think we live in
Sit in silence
Just me and him
our uninvited
Long time friend
misery comes strolling in
The only one who knows the truth
Isn't even him or I
It's all a show
It's all pretend
It is misery
Once again
A lost glove or mitten
For some there's never a pair
Some never smitten
Lost forever
Never to be found
Frozen solid in the ground
Aug 12 · 473
Misery Loves Company
I miss your smile
The way you laugh
I miss back when
Together
we would bath
Together forever
We thought we'd be
But now we're both
In misery
Aren't relationships fun
Someday he's gonna **** me
Until then I'll hold my breath
Either way
I'am dying
No more life
For me left
Aug 10 · 15
Emptiness
Empty like a bottle
Rolling upon the shore
Just another bottle
One more than before
You fly away like a sparrow
Happy and free
But leave behind
A broken heart
Only heart thats broken me
Like the bottle upon the shore
No destination or
message
More empty than before
Loneliness
Can't express
Only me
Floating in the open sea
don't want to roll up empty
upon another shore                         breath into me life
give me what Im Looking for
Even a note to no one
It's more than before
A message in a bottle
Something that crashes upon the shore
Fore there are many
That drift upon the sandy shore
They don't hold a special note
A card or a spell
The waves keep crashing upon the bottles we won't dwell
However they keep coming in with the waves and tides bringing
Even tho they may be empty
For someone there's a clue
Only known to the ocean and the person it sent it too.
Another day
Another dollar
For people like me
Life's a bother
Another day,
Another gin
Its life
the problem
I keep runnin in
Aug 8 · 31
;
;
God, I've put myself on your doorstep
Maybe a time or two
But you refuse me
Won't take me home with you
This world is so confusing
just want to be with you
God take me home sooner than later
All I want is you
I can't stand it here
as few often do
This world is so demanding
I pledge my fear to you
Dear God take me home
Where I belong  
I can't stand it here
Everyday and every night
It's I that struggles
An endless fight
For I am tired too
So Please
Open your gates
And let me in
I'll leave behind me my bottle of gin
take me home
Where I belong
Cause I cant stand it
these people are wrong
Not another second month or year
Please open your doors and soothe all my sores, for it is here
That I can't bare
Anymore
Aug 7 · 36
Extraordinary
Ordinary people do extraordinary things said no ordinary person ever  While pulling extraordinary strings
Nothing compares
To few
Where'd the times go
Not a day goes by
I don't miss or think of you
Aug 7 · 25
Daddy
Friend or foe
Or some Joe blow
I'm your daughter
A stranger tho
words cut deep
Sting like cold bitter snow
bleed a little
Scarred forever tho
Impressions on my skin
Caused by life, sometimes grim
Daddy's gone and best friend
So funny smart and oh so clever
Made me smile and laugh forever
Always had my back
time for me didn't lack
I just want my daddy back
In the same room
Sharin space
Craving my daddy, his warm embrace
Sitting near, a stranger I fear
Someone I no longer know
Void of emotion lackin show
Saddest tears down my face
Gripping fears
 Have no one in this lonley place
Wishing years grinding gears
Need my daddy to wipe my tears
Still looks like him
My Daddy's face
today a stranger
Takes his place
Memories
all I have
hope someday
I'll have my daddy back
Addiction tares even the strongest relationships apart, along with that went my heart
Aug 3 · 68
Labor Pains
Off my tongue venom flies
As your head slips from between my thighs
Right then I realize I cursed all nurses and made most cry
Wished your father a miserable demise
It was because of him
They cut me open front to rim
My **** where huge, swollen, and sore
Look as if on them someone was keeping score
Stretched, fat, and p#ssy sore
I shouldn't have been such a *****
This is my sick humor.
Hope I don't offend anyone!
Aug 3 · 31
Karma
Karma was a friend of mine
When I was young, dumb and blind
I then grew old, frail - out of mind
Karma still a friend of mine
The world I thought I knew
Kicked my *** a time or two
Naive
No not me, I knew
More than the girl next door
Karma bust my lip some more
Turns out much is never true
The 12 laws I never knew
Now today I live by em
Can't wait til my dear friend
Karma
Catches up to them.
Ain't no point getting out of bed if you ain't livin the dream
Life isn't easy and nothin' what it seems
Learn to read between the lines
nothin' what it means
Dreams only happen at night
If I ain't hauntin your schemes
Learn to live life right
Ain't nothin what it seems
I've lived and learned and nothing is ever what it seems. EVER!
Jul 23 · 355
Gone
Remember when
You loved me instead...
Now I'm gone forever
To you
I'm dead
Jul 3 · 28
I'm my problem
My conscious is heavy
My shoulders are slumped
When I see my family
My throat gets a lump
I want to run
Want to hide
Want anything other than to be alive
Stuck in this cycle
Gone completely insane
Wanting things different
Without Wanting to change
The shackles I bear
Are shackles of shame
Their chains are heavy
They cause me great pain
The battle I'm fighting
Been fighting for years
All out of fight
And all out of tears
Tired of fighting, getting nowhere
All cried out
Filled with fear
Time to put down my armor
Let my guard down
Time to start over
Since no ones around
Pushed 'em all away
While I rot and decay
Want them to leave
But want them to stay
Why God?
Am I this way?
Apr 8 · 59
Broken Limbs
Like a bird with a broken wing
have only a voice left
  no beautiful songs to sing
Only hope left
this gust of winds
Take me where you will
I'll fight what you may bring
Even with my broken heart
And my broken wing
I'll sing my song
And your beautiful hymns
Til my journey comes to an end
With you beside me
I have no brokenness
I'll sing
Feb 25 · 385
Poisons & Potions
Poisons and potions
Past years of emotions
Regretting my actions
Forgetting my passions
Feelings can't be felt, I've drowned them and numbed them out
I'm insecure and full of doubt
Any chance of hope, I snuffed it out
Replaced it with fear and impending doom
Get out of my way please give me some room
All alone, isolation is home
Pushed everyone away so I can suffer alone
Look in the mirror, see a stranger I fear
No longer trust anyone, death is near
Can't handle feeling, won't allow it
Redirect my thoughts,                          
self destructions my power
Silence is deafening, hour by hour
Forget I exist, I won't be here tomorrow
No hope, just dope, is how I cope, I'm a coward
Self mutilation, my ****** creation
The more I bleed, closer to freed
Please God forgive me, my souls in need.
Feb 25 · 37
All an Illusion
Everything I thought I knew
Turns out it wasn't true.
Now I find myself feeling blue
Only because I believed in you.
Feb 25 · 20
Tired
So confused
Nowhere to turn
Ready to run
What path do I choose
Will I ever learn
When running I lose
What do I want from life
Not one thing I yearn for
Forgot who I am
And what I am here for
Keep making the same mistakes
Destined to an empty fate
Failure for me is common
I don't have much more to lose
Completely broken down now
Still asking everyone else to chose
Can't trust myself or anyone else
My constant state is confused
What do you do
When your out of breath and you can't run from yourself?
How come you don't love me
You act like your above me
We both have lived
Did things we aren't proud of
You seen my best side
Then seen the worst of me
I grew, rose above it all
But you still look at me disappointed
By my fall, act like I'm cursed
But really I'm only tired after all

How about instead of analyzing me
You look at yourself first
You have bruises and bumps from life also we both been hurt
I've done drugs and drank
You have slept with hoes and did much more
Whose to say we don't have equal scores?
Next time you think your the judge
Look in the mirror  and realize
You aren't the One from above
Quit hating everyone else
And learn to love
Feb 20 · 81
Abandoned
Please stick by me
Never walk away
I am me no matter what
I'm begging you to stay
Why can't you love me for me
Instead of wishing me another way
If only I was good enough for you
Maybe you'd still be here today
I only know how to be me
I don't know another way
What's so wrong with who I am
That makes everyone go astray
All I want is love and acceptance
For who I have become today
What is so wrong with me and why does no one ever stay?
Feb 14 · 558
Violent Times
Domestic violence
Often lives in silence
Not to be spoken of
Always hidden in shame
Never the perp
To take any blame
Always pointing the finger
At the one that lingers in silence
Not making any waves
To avoid any violence
Mental abuse
Paralyzing me with fear
Often left wondering
How'd I get here
Living in a glass house
Quiet as a church mouse
Not knowing when the cracks may appear
Why can't I make him happy?
Constantly hiding all my tears
I've lost myself living amongst him,
Living in fear
This life of insanity,
Of compromising love
Has me forgetting who I am
Who I once was
Only thing I am certain of is
This isn't what we call love
Feb 12 · 939
Domestic Violence
I love him how can he love back
When he wont stop beating on me
Mentally and physically
Why is he hurting me
I promise I'll do better
Be a better me
Please just stop
Abusing me
I know it's my fault
I'll do better next time
Please I love you
I wont ever get out of line
I'm not sure what I'd do
I couldn't go on if I lost you
I want to get out but I can't
I guess I'm going to have to take that chance
The mental abuse is far greater than the physical.
A game of cat and mouse!
If I were you I'd get the #uck out of that house!
Feb 12 · 43
A Lonley Place
Because my bruises are within
All my issues are pretend...
Feb 12 · 118
Shooting Star
We dove into the warm deep waters
Nothing holding us back
Not one thing that matters
We gaze upon the beautiful sky
Sparkling stars shooting by
Just us two, only you and I
The night seemed magical, as it was
Then in the dawn of morning
Reality, there it was
If only the magical night was real
Then we'd both know how true love would feel.
It was a magical night but if only the timing was right.
We seen 3 shooting stars that night.
Feb 10 · 443
Goodbye
I do not understand him anymore
I now see a stranger when he walks threw the door
Things he has done and refuses to say
Has left me feeling lonely and I feel so betrayed
Wasted time is all we have together
I only want out now, that's all that matters
You can't hurt me anymore
I no longer shed tears for you
I'm all used up and my feelings are too
Ready to move on in this world alone
Moving forward with a heart turned to stone
I tried and I tried, all of this I did alone
You do not care, your actions have shown
This is a place I no longer call home
My wings have grown back and I'm ready to fly
This is my last and final goodbye
Feb 9 · 115
Unknown Hurt
My eyes are welling
Don't want them to know that I'm alive
How I feel on the inside
Am I truly dead or am I alive
My tears could fill the ocean
Not knowing what I'm capable of fulfilling
I have lost all of me
In this world of complete insanity   tell me is it you or is it me
we all face the same destiny
Feb 8 · 41
Untitled #3
What a nightmare
When your not there
I don't feel alive
Don't belong anywhere
But in your arms
Is when I feel strong
I finally found a place that I belong
Feb 8 · 24
City of Sin
The lights in the city
Isn't it pretty
Walk on the outskirts
See the pain and hurt
Look at the mess
People dancing, dressed in nothing but flesh
As we spend our 1000's
On nothing but machines we Barrow from
Look at the pain
Men and women sleeping in the rain
I want to help them
You can't save them all, as I'm on the phone with a friend during our call
They can't be forgotten
They must have someone they love and all
My mind spins in the city of sin
They can't be forgotten
What kind of world do we live in?
How can we be so blinded
There are ones less guided
Let's come together and be more open minded
Pull together and help the ones that have fallen in this world
Their hands weren't guided by the one holding the pearls
Open your hearts
And together we'll save this beautiful world.
My thighs they cried
For you to be on the inside
Carry me away to complete fantasy
Just you and I as I slowly die on the inside
My loves not enough for you to be forever struck
By the insides of my thick thighs
I just hope you realize the prize on the inside
Its only for you the one I let in to see who I'am truly
Let's let forever begin with you on top of me.
Feb 6 · 29
Darkness within
My poems are dark
They come from deep within
Something I've been holding onto
All of my sin
Has escaped onto these pages here within
Never to be unwritten, never to be saved
Never to be spoken until this very day
All of my feelings I've kept within
Secretly hiding all the pain that I'm in
As I was crawling from out of my skin
My hand it held the pencil within
Only for all of this to come to an end
I've let it out I can't contain it again
For on these pages its written in pen
All of my secrets
All of lifes lies
All of lifes disappointments
All of my cries
How come I'm so dreary on the inside
I've let it out and the darkness sinks in
Only for all this madness within
To be put on paper with this pen
the sadness unfolds
It isn't over yet
As it beholds.
Feb 5 · 34
Chance of Change
Do something to change it
Quit just saying and relaying it
Take a stand
Take a chance
For the change of it
Feb 5 · 134
Undecided 2
We are undecided all the time
Undecided
Locked in time
Undecided
Til we die
Misunderstood
You and I.
Feb 5 · 34
Forever in Reverse
Forever in my heart
From the very start
To the bitter end
Till we meet again
My love has only grown
By your actions
I'm torn
What will it be
Together forever shall we?
I tried to do a reverse poem. I hope it makes sense to you like it does to me!
Jan 27 · 42
Regret
The sin within me is secret,
I dont let anyone know me.
If I did I'd have to own it.
This is something I can't let go of
The sin is deep within my soul.
Not knowing who I can trust it can't be told.
The truth it burns like an ember.
Forgetting things I want to remember.
You cant be honest this is sad,
I was the best you ever had.
You leave with this unrecognized
This is true
It's not going to be me regretting anything but you.
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