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Siyana 2d
The skies are above us both tonight,
and the same oceans surround us,
it's the same time of night...
but something in the distance
is hiding you from me
it's the aligning of our paths
the way the moon meets the sea...
wherever you go, whoever you meet
know that I did love you with every inch of my being
even If I weren't good at showing it
blame it on my past
but I just know in my bones
that this is the end
this was our art....
Feb 15 · 17
Siyana Feb 15
we touched
we loved
we ******..
and I've never felt the warmth of fire
but I bet it feels the way my heart does
when it beats next to you...

Modern take of Emily Dickinson's "Wild Nights"...
Feb 15 · 214
Siyana Feb 15
I fear your hands
I fear your skin
I fear your eyes
they absorb me in...
I fear your touch
I fear your name
I fear your voice
it drives me insane....

I fear you...
A poem about falling in love with someone who you fear from the strength of your feelings towards them...
Feb 15 · 97
Sad girl. Bad girl.
Siyana Feb 15
I'm a sad girl.
I'm a bad girl.
I'm a sad, bad girl.
I'm a bad, sad girl.

Me and my best friend snuck into my room.
I took her shirt off, and the next thing we knew
was our clothes lying on the floor,
this felt nothing like before...
Friendship on fire,
that's what I'd call our love..
I could never get enough
of the way your hands can touch.....
Feb 15 · 101
It feels good to be sad
Siyana Feb 15
I am sad
I won't deny it
the only one who made me happy was you,
but now you're gone
and I can't hide it
there's not much else that I can do
except miss you.....
Feb 2 · 529
Bubble Wrapped..
Siyana Feb 2
I'm fearful,
don't ask of what,
because I'm fearful of,

I'm bubble wrapped,
and if you bother asking why,
take a look outside...............
This poem is about the destruction that's currently happening in our planet, and how it feels to be afraid to live..
Jan 20 · 176
Siyana Jan 20
There is a girl called Ebony,
with long, golden hair
and eyes like the sea... The way she touches
like feathers on my skin
I wish it weren't hard for me
to let people in..her heart is made of gold
and mine is of stone
when someone gets too close
I miss being alone
but now that you're gone,
you ripple my heart through,
with every breath, I'll long for you..
Jan 20 · 106
Siyana Jan 20
Pain has become my distraction
The only one with enough of me to make me feel alive
I waited by the water, to find that my love had died
The way my pebble made ripples in the pond
The way it was so easy for her to just move on
Jan 20 · 53
I'm scared
Siyana Jan 20
Scared to touch,
the violence in my childhood

Scared to love
the way my mother's legs were bruised

Scared to live
from the moments where humans are treated like plastic in a landfill...
Jan 20 · 53
Siyana Jan 20
With a heart that bleeds,
a mind that heeds
eyes that see,
destruction in uncertainty...

When you live in sadness,
any other pain
is forgiven
by the glistening of the pelting rain.....
Nov 2019 · 334
The Wild Girl
Siyana Nov 2019
She was wild like Scarlett letter,

is it her fault that she didn't know any better...

She lit her match, and lit up the torch,

dancing in a trance while there's a flame running off...

They call girls like me easy,

Is it wrong to want to love other people's bodies?

We grow up in worlds ruled by hate,

expressing myself shouldn't make me 'insane'...
Oct 2019 · 495
A Girl Like Lucy
Siyana Oct 2019
Her eyes smiled, like the crystal blue of the ocean reeling me in...
Her hair shone with the sun rays capturing the golden hues that move with each strand...
Her lips, so gentle, so smooth...
Her heart, like the castles we'd build as children on the beach that'd get torn apart by each careless stranger's step...
Oct 2019 · 377
As Far as I Run
Siyana Oct 2019
As far as I run,
as loud as I scream.
Even if I lose what I have,
I can't bring you back to me...
Oct 2019 · 133
Siyana Oct 2019
I'm tired
but I'm trying
Is that okay?

I don't know why,
or what I'm waiting for
but I just want somebody who'll stay...

I am tired.
I'm tired.
I am tired.
I'm tired.

Please don't let me down or let me go,
I just want you cause you feel like home
Don't let me down or let me go
If you don't say it how will you ever know....
Oct 2019 · 86
Out of My Mind
Siyana Oct 2019
It's like I'm lost in a world where anything can change...
I'm scared of myself, and I've forgotten my own face.
Confusion when I look into a mirror,
I can't seem to remember who I used to be,
Is there anyone who actually knows me?

I'm out of my mind...
Is that okay?
Will you stick by?
Or take advantage of me?
I'm out of my mind
will you stay?
even if it means
I'll run you down a drain..
Oct 2019 · 672
If I were a boy...
Siyana Oct 2019
If I were a boy, you'd like me so.
I wouldn't feel sad about the way you let me go...
If I were a boy, you'd hold my hand in public,
you wouldn't worry about what the rest of the world thinks...
If I were a boy, we'd be together right now..
You wouldn't be with him, and my heart wouldn't make a sound...
If only I were a boy...
Sep 2019 · 215
"Wholesome Dreams"
Siyana Sep 2019
Sometimes, I dream about you,
and when I do, it's a lucky night...
Because when you touch me in my sleep
I feel so wholesome inside...
The deep blue, with one thought of you,
lets me let you in...
I just wish that when I wake up,
you'd touch me for real and I could feel it again...
Sep 2019 · 183
Misplacing my things...
Siyana Sep 2019
I'm not going to lie,
I feel so alone.
Trapped in my own mind.
I don't know where to call my home,
I feel so broken inside...
The trees, the ground, the sun,
without you, i feel afraid...
The earth doesn't feel like much,
when you realise how easily your things can break...
Sep 2019 · 2.3k
In a bathroom at a party...
Siyana Sep 2019
I'm in a bathroom at a party,
             why do i always lock myself away...
               I don't know how to have fun,
              so please don't depend at all on me...
                         I like my solitude
Sep 2019 · 125
Siyana Sep 2019
Let me hold onto you
mindless of the weight of the world
and the untold truths...
Please be my shoulder to lean on
when things get too much and life gets rough,
i just need to know that I can count on you...
Sep 2019 · 1.9k
Siyana Sep 2019
I'm a stalker I can't lie,
I like to watch you all the time...
The way you placed your hands on me,
I won't forget, it's destiny..
I'm a stalker, I can't lie,
I watch the way you fold your tie,
I can't help the chemistry
I feel when you're next to me...

And all I need to know,
is, Do you feel it too?
And all I need to know
is, Will there ever be a me and you?
love happiness soul eyes strangers pain love joy
Sep 2019 · 158
Siyana Sep 2019
We are strangers,
you don't know me and I don't know you...
But there are invisible lines connecting us,
our paths they meet in the distance, just like the sun and the moon..

and all we are and will ever be are units of space in the atmosphere...
but the way we look into each other's eyes tells me that there is something more there...
Sep 2019 · 514
Wild Eyes
Siyana Sep 2019
I never met a soul like hers.
She made me feel wild and free like the wind..
I felt the heat of the sun and the lush of the grass,
as she placed her hands beneath my skirt....
Her wild eyes could evacuate my soul from my body..
Sep 2019 · 162
Siyana Sep 2019
You said that I'm as cold as winter in its peak,
that not even the arctic wolves would survive, living with me...
You played me like a fiddle, and each time, you would win..
How could I ever let a stone heart like yours in?
So be it that I'm cold,
I have my reasons to be...
If you don't know how to love yourself, how could you ever love someone like me...
I hear the stories you tell, how strategic are your lies...
I let you win, because as I said, you'd play the victim each time...
To all the girls who've given you their body,
I can only imagine the pain that they'd feel..
When I gave you my words, you tore them apart..
What we had was never real.
So I will trust my heart, which doesn't trust you..
Sep 2019 · 225
Queen Sized Bed...
Siyana Sep 2019
Your sweet embrace,
In this moment I feel present.
And I like your taste,
your touch feels like heaven.
Candy is not bittersweet,
when you're lying this close to me.
Kingdom come, thy will be done
a boy is dangerous,
as is a gun.
Queen sized bed,
I feel your warmth.
His heart is good,
but his mind is in a war...
Siyana Sep 2019
His heart was cold,
but his eyes were emerald green.
The beauty behind danger
was heaven to me.
I should have known what he was capable of
my mother once told me to trust no one..
but i fell in love,
oh i fell in love
his eyes would shine brighter than the moon and sun
i know my ignorance gets the very best of me
but i fell in love with a bad man
and it was no one else's fault,
i just loved blindly...
Siyana Sep 2019
You wake up, and it's cold outside. You think that your eyes are  closed.. But when you try to open them, you realise that colour doesn't exist in your world anymore.. You feel so afraid, you kick and scream.. but screaming won't bring back your eyesight..
You pray and pray... But you feel unheard... You don't know how to move through the room to call someone to tell them what's happening.. You hurt yourself, thinking this could be a dream..
And then you realise, this is permanent..  You're blind...
You won't ever see the extravagant Christmas lights again..  You won't see the look on your mother's face when she's unwrapping her presents.. You won't see the people who surround you...
Sep 2019 · 1.7k
I miss you..
Siyana Sep 2019
My pride will never let me tell you, but I miss you so much.
You were my first real friend, my first real love..
The ocean blue that tainted your eyes,
it won't let me hear your muffled cries tonight..
I know you miss me too, i feel it sometimes..
The sharks and their large teeth didn't want us to swim by...
I do miss you, but what good would missing do...
for me, I just can't get over you...
Sep 2019 · 247
Peanut Butter Heart..
Siyana Sep 2019
Homemade spread on crumpets and toast
A thin slice of me, wherever you go..
Bed & Breakfasts at the Chateau Marmont..
Where you'd write me letters in an ivory font..
Your old soul haunts through the strings of my guitar,
I was a groupie, while you brought the music..
Drugs, Loneliness, Deception & no through roads..
Isn't that just the way it was supposed to go...

I hear your music sometimes, on the radio..
a stairway to heaven is just as close...
Sorry that you only thought of me
as a string you played, yours sincerely....
About a romance between a musician and a waitress. When the musician becomes a household name he starts to see her as a groupie rather than his girlfriend.. as he dives into a life of substance abuse and rock star virtues..
Aug 2019 · 182
Sally's In The Summer:
Siyana Aug 2019
A premonition,
I feel it in my sleep.
My belly's big,
and my sons are a dream.
My husband's walking up to me,
we've built it at last,
it's all it could be...
We have a coastal lifestyle for two,
my mother's doing great,
my sister is too.
I remember my old friend,
wonder how she's doing,
do we ever meet again?
that's up to heaven...
Aug 2019 · 491
Siyana Aug 2019
I miss your face and I miss your smile,
the way you'd laugh, and the way you'd lie.
I can't let your pretty face go,
I hope you know that I love you so.
I travel with time & the sun,
we live, we learn, we go, we come.
You're beautiful, you're sun-kissed.
I wish again I could be close to your pretty lips...
Aug 2019 · 1.1k
The Hustle
Siyana Aug 2019
I'm panting, I'm waiting
hoping and praying
that my efforts will finally be paid..
I'm wishing and thinking
"please luck be efficient"
working my life away...
I enter the rink,
with one punch I drop to my knees
blood streaming down my nose,
but I've worked too hard to settle for the broke life..
I'm sick of rummaging the fridge to not be able to grant food,
my stomach loud and hungry,
but there's nothing I can do..
So I take this shot,
yearning for the best,
all I want is to live free of debt.
Not be able to know what it feels like for your rent to be late,
but to live comfortably without the worry of money.....
Siyana Aug 2019
The way he looked at me,
I could tell.
This man was heartless.
Sadistic as well.
He pulled my hand,
And in the heat
I looked down to see
Bruises on my knees...
He touched himself
when there was blood on my skirt
wanted more,
I copped the hurt..
Then a passerby starts to see
But he turns his head to smile at me.
The same man who once
Ripped my clothes to shreds
His crooked smile,
In the moment I could tell
This man was heartless
Sadistic as well...
This poem is thought to be of a girl and her abusive father... It is not a true story, but is based on events that occur every day in our world.
Aug 2019 · 3.2k
Siyana Aug 2019
The warmth and softness of her lips,
I felt her sensuality, placed through her kiss...
The midnight conversations, the laughter, the fights.
Little did we know, what would happen tonight.
The rosary knocked itself to the floor,
Now your father is knocking on the door...
"Girls, are you ready for church?"
Her hands placed in mine, under my skirt.
"Not yet, we'll be fifteen minutes."
He leaves. She comes. Now I've felt healing.
Aug 2019 · 154
First Love.
Siyana Aug 2019
We were nine,
when we played in the woods,
wooden shields
and traded goods.
You climbed the tree,
when you fell on your knee,
and from the ground you called for me...

Seven years later,
we've distanced a slight.
You've got your friends,
I've got my pride.
Then all of a sudden,
fate brought you back,
before you know it,
we're back to our past.
But now we can drive,
and it's free and fun,
you put your hand on me
and i could touch the sun...
We pretended we forgot,
like nothing went on,
now, twenty years has past
what's done is done....

I've got my kids,
you've got your wife.
But in my heart,
I wonder what it would have been like...
If you were the dad,
If it were you and me...
But lets face the truth...
It never was, and it never will be..
A story about a woman who has a best friend from a young age, and when they grow into teenagers they catch feelings, but find it awkward so they avoid it, and when they're in their late thirties their lives are very different, and they cannot go back into their past, so they embrace their current, separate situations although she still holds a place for him in her heart.
Siyana Aug 2019
It's trapped inside my body,
a dark and cloudy dust...
I can't let it out,
it's merged with my blood.
I call for a doctor,
but they won't pick up the phone..
I spend my time wallowing,
It's not leaving me alone...

How can I be better,
when the past is always on my mind...
I'm scared to love,
I'm scared to live,
I just watch the days go by..

Finally, I find a way to remove it from inside of me.
Now I hear a ring from my phone,
But, now there is no need...
Aug 2019 · 312
The Pain
Siyana Aug 2019
I pulled her hair,
I tore her clothes.
She felt the wrath,
that's as far as I know...
In the moment,
I caught my breath,
while I turned to see
her head a mess.
Strangled, bruised, battered, broken.
My actions caused her to break apart.
Now all I do is hope that,
I could go back in time to repair her heart...
This is a post about sadistic thought. Those who do have sadistic thought should definitely admit it to themselves and get help. This poem is emphasizing the fact that sadism is also a mental illness, and the relationship between two girls due to one's desire to control.

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