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Sidharth Suraj Nov 2021
Fishing for impudence
looking outside,
all seem so murky
with a dying light,
all seem so monochrome,
with a condescending benight.
Now I am looking closely
and all that I found,
was a hatred very symmetric,
to which I am bound.
Just like the voids
I see in myself,
maybe my lens is too murky,
or my windows blacked out,
but life is miserable
and I see it around.

I often try to deny,
and live like everything’s fine,
but some feelings never settle,
some actions don’t suffice.
I look for answers around
I look for meanings behind,
maybe it’s a different me,
or maybe it’s the defeated mind.
Thoughts never to settle,
when I write sometimes,
but facing your fears,
through the words you write
is more difficult than accepting the light.

I often try to view this,
in a stupidly optimistic hue,
thinking like a flower
proud of its scent and bloom.
Thinking I am unique and
so might be my issues,
but I don’t want to look around
cause inside I know,
I am part of the million others
that bloomed and withered in this garden too.
My problems don’t amount
to the privileges I own,
and pain might be puny
when compared to yours,
but I still get hurt,
even if my problems aren’t new,
I still want to say them,
even when my words are few.
All these words are static just like my thoughts.
Sidharth Suraj Jun 2021
All feelings inside create a meaning,
if you are patient enough to explore them.
These small reasons around us,
we fail to grasp their beauty.
We often fail to hear them
either we are not receptive enough
or have grown immune to them
either we are too blind to appreciate,
or they might have evolved
too fast for us to comprehend.

More than often we hear,
“you won’t understand”,
still a paradox in itself,
a question with answers unknown.
How to truly decipher the emotions
that our words fail to express.
The true meaning behind a tear,
the true intention of a silence,
the true pain behind separation.
This animosity created due to ignorance,
indeed is the greatest bliss,
less to decipher when
only a few meanings exist.

It’s just fine,
some emotions are beyond us,
beyond your words and actions.
impossible to capsulate,
monumental to appreciate.
It’s just fine
if often people don’t understand you,
It’s just fine
if often people don’t find your answers.
It’s just fine
if incoherence exists,
just like the immaculate idea of the dark of the moon,
beauty beyond comprehension.
Gives you a chance to create
a unique one for your own,
the one only you could appreciate.
Some could never understand, some never try.
Sidharth Suraj Jun 2021
All these changes inside bring a new canvas,
the one catered with an address to your soul,
granting you a chance to explore the new shades,
those colours that you are too afraid to mix,
those colours you are forbidden to mix,
colours that seem to fit in your canvas.
Learn to evolve in those feelings,
accept those colours and see,
if the outcome is a blank feeling,
or a rainbow of hope,
a feeling that your identity,
reciprocates the colours of your soul.
  May 2021 Sidharth Suraj
Sylvia Plath
Here are two pupils
whose moons of black
transform to cripples
all who look:

each lovely lady
who peers inside
take on the body
of a toad.

Within these mirrors
the world inverts:
the fond admirer's
burning darts

turn back to injure
the thrusting hand
and inflame to danger
the scarlet wound.

I sought my image
in the scorching glass,
for what fire could damage
a witch's face?

So I stared in that furnace
where beauties char
but found radiant Venus
reflected there.
Sidharth Suraj Apr 2021
Power is pleasure
but pleasure can always end up toxic.
State blames the power,
the power is a slave to the money,
money running this nation,
Man-made paper running Man.
too much politics, weak politics
Sidharth Suraj Apr 2021
It's all a fallacy, this game we play.
With nothing much to lose,
and oddities to gain.
Dirt drenched kisses linger longer on the lips of shadows.
As the sun chases their nights away,
concocting different tomorrows.
In the passing of life,
we cross over with strife.
Shadows and ghosts dine as friends in hell.
But above the ground,
oh, they keep their separate shells.

Humans live in their shells,
shells of lie, love and lust.
With nothing to give back to one another,
nothing but long lines of agony and despair.
Sidharth Suraj Mar 2021
Chloroforming your joys,
disappearing in noise.
Writing to a feeling,
lost with a pen unpoised.
Corner lights fluorescent yellow,
the poisonous sweet smell of love so mellow.
Quit being a slave to a nameless voice,
let your today,
be a regretless choice.
A shorter version of L I F E.
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