Lit by angels and adrenaline
silent auctions, abductions
still as death decends here
Archadia dimmed
a dimension of distractions
ever sinking in the pretty little nest feathered with fear
she sinned so soft; 
knowing nothing else to sleep beneath
twigs and bones returned from the battle
gnawed clean from anxious teeth
so brittle; you become a love song to the cold
that rattles of defiance
Longing a place I cant face alone

this is not Archadia
these sweetly poisoned streets
full of tempting berries
choking on my mind
every sniff every sip every inhale is all we have
to stop what we are in-between
awaiting, impatient
so feral from empathy
dreaming of each others bliss
an escape to humidity
an instant view of the sea
it might fix this

but it doesn't

I wish , I wish
my memory could imprint on me
that cascading fading message
I always leave in rem sleep
the lack of loathing now I'm old
old enough to know life's secrets
still too young to live by them
this is not Arcadia
this is a January town where every new idea never starts
an eternal dance
a feast just for show
so starving eyes swell

the grass is always gone where I go

I wish , I wish
the night could take me to Archadia
my silence as loud as
the auction lost
here were are; in the rotting sequence
pining for a reward
I'll build my own Archadia
out of precious words, molecules of hope
how to enlighten
omens of wonder, summer rain excitement

I roll down the grassy hill
turn another page
to somewhere I can smell resilience
a rest bite, evacuate the cold and reunite with your innocence

Welcome to Archadia
where hands are full of strength
a land full of scents that warm those frantic souls
giving out their tidings
these rebels repel your decisions

here is your Archadia
empathy is everything
a peaceful wave of lighting
a quiet sob of clarity
an instant view of the sea
Welcome to Archadia
you're here to be free

Wide spread of solitary
Lost to open tempting and encouraging thoughts
humming aftershock
Still tampering with ice cold ideas
Forget-me-not flavours
Charged up on my fears
Don't do me any favours
Don't tell me any lies unless they're sugar coated to my core
Let me live off them
Let me adore an idea
Blissfully burping bubbles of ignorance
Whistfully watching them Sculp the skyline
Empty. And always seconds away from the truth
That they are soon to be nothing

She watches the rain whilst I listen to it
The wink of a huntress
Swift, poised
The grim reaper of small beasts with wings
Their fate in her claws
But then shes snoozing
Cute and carnivorous
She heals my loneliness
I imitate her noises

She sleeps on my pillow
I stroke her with awe
She brings me dead things
I smile as she yawns
I am jealous of how much she is unconscious

I'll never know her thoughts
She is known to hear my own
I feed her daily
But she is free of time
Harmonising
We don't speak the same language
She trills at my window
I am happy to serve
I am hers
as much as she is mine

Full disclosure, there’s not many who know her
for who she really is
A face before its baptised by morning
Bleeding gums rotting lungs bed crumbs search history
regrets hidden away in unread books kinks and mysteries
internal monologue pillow talk a disarray of leaked promises
a catastrophe awaits
can’t manage time or money
always in a hurry
that preferred seat on the bus when its free
she is consciousness
she summertime
she is vanity
And even when her mind is anarchy
she is an open wound with all her insanity
a sweet hyperbole
so don’t take her too literally
as bold as a secret told in a whisper
and exiled for her  audacity
as ferocious as they’ll let her be

and in an instant it falls short
she rarely utilities silence
but asks   ‘do you talk to your thoughts?’
whether empty or optimistic
they’re ready, to present predicaments
lost to the night-time
she dreamt she was at crescent, longing to be full
its no coincidence she fains to the moons pull
A gatherer; fables of youth unstable to their intentions
solutions consumed by a draft that keeps
inherent phobias locked away
there’s a stray child with your voice in her head
you hush to comprehend her
a creator you made her
meander to your agenda
she’ll never be you
she’s wrapped up in
a plague of shame
a carousel of what makes her afraid
around and around again
deranged, insane and maniacally to blame
till theres a bittersweet beauty to every colour she can name

but colour exists within her
a short rush of boxed up souls stretching to the sky
a race of who can outlast the pace of august
and curtsy at the contrast
the mind infiltrates the gifts it gives
and she knows happiness is not a tap
her anxiety not a conviction to her minds confliction

a catastrophe awaits
wide asleep, fast awake
she will give all that she takes

Hammer attack surgeries,
Farmer controlled nurseries,
A Llama themed bakery
And a duck.

A view bigger than I'm used to
Pathetic fallacy has swallowed me
And I'm spat out 5 hours from home
I revel in the chance to wander observe but unsettled, cursed
Aside from a past time parade
Picking up on little things
That cascade into 5 years of no sleep
In the orange factory
I weep heavy with memory
Allotments in wintertime
Moments of people on the street
Vape pens strewn on a bus shelter roof
A bulldog free cursed in magenta
A seed of goodness desperate for its vitamin d
I see potential in the coming month
Neglected when I rewalk this place in misery

The consequences
The distress of spiked churchyard steel gates
I see my mess in a reel of mistakes
The appeal of overpriced *** and being young dumb, hands outreached for promises that instigate
Larger than life
In the mansion of strobe light
Higher than ideas of who I'd be
I cant dance away my struggles anymore
I am haunting this fresh year
All I want is to sleep in a city wide awake
And It will never be the same
All I want to do is play dead so I can be buried under the dancing feet
Cased in a casket of nostalgia
So I'll never have to meet you again