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Nadia Sep 2019
The autumn canvass
Blurs beneath busy feet
A chorus of umbrellas waltz
Along the bustling street

Cars splash through puddles
Spray crescendos joyously
It was then that their eyes met
Across a city sidewalk symphony



NCL September 2019
Nadia Aug 2019
A broken maze hides inside my mind;
Revelers rambling round never find
The end - lacking signposts or guides,
They tread eternities while the exit hides

From echoing clatter to blinding roar,
From gentle pitter-patter to take no more,
Crowds mill through in groups and pairs;
The walls vibrate, as do I downstairs

Food trucks ply their bountiful snacks
Feeding frenzy, launching scent attacks;
The noxious steam combines to rise,
Waft out, confound and desensitize

Enclosed in walls impossible to climb
Trapped all together in layered time
The revelers begin to sway and swerve
Blundering on networks of frayed nerve

With no path to success or even escape
The horde begins to push and scrape
The walls - tremble, creak, quiver, quake;
The maze, my mind, my universe - break

NCL August 2019
Nadia Dec 2019
Helpless to overcome the failings,

The fall out of a selfish, cowardly man

Heart broken, fury stoking, a mother

Does all she can
                             And then some


She’ll work until her fingers break

Holding tears, enveloped in rage

Impossible tasks she'll power through

A mother’s love will do
                                       As it needs to
Nadia Jul 2019
Anxiety knows the world is burning
   Even if we can't see the flames

Anxiety knows predators are out there
   Even if we don’t know their names

Anxiety knows bad luck happens
  Simply unfortunate events lay claim

Anxiety knows less about statistics
   And much about things that maim


NCL July 2019
Nadia Oct 2019
I am sorry I picked you up
off the top of the fridge
and draped you scarflike
over my shoulders;

To be fair, the fridgetop
looked unsafe, even for
sure-footed feline folk;
then I couldn’t resist,

All that fur, fluffy and soft;
your reprimand was
fairly played; forgive me,
you make a cozy scarf


NCL October 2019
Nadia Aug 2019
Wearing masks
Telling lies
Evil basks
Ignoring cries

Insatiable greed
Power struggles
Tensions breed
Kindness juggles

Voices raise
Anger rises
Compassion malaise
Divided compromises

Blinded gaze
Humanity lost
Apathetic ways
Human cost

NCL August 2019
Nadia Sep 2019
The morning is dark, as
if the sun never truly rose;

the street is lit in sepia
tones, heavy clouds
repose on the canopies
of fall-grizzled oaks;

unseen birds warble
in hushed, muffled tones,
while ghostly cars travel
on cloud-dampened roads;

the children, buttoned in
to their back-to-school
clothes, weave or meander
the sidewalk, half-asleep;

- gather the little ones close
in this quiet calm before
the madness strikes -

- know your exits, know
your foes - who knows
what might... happen -

then sun parts languorous
clouds, sending rainbows to
vanquish the mists; sunlight
sparks warmth inside;

gloom and doom forgotten,
a golden day to seize and fly


NCL September 2019
Ever ask for feedback before a piece is done and regret it?
Nadia Apr 2019
Do the bathmat shuffle
To the closet in the hall
It's never very graceful
But try not to fall

No towels on the shelf
Must be in the dryer
Do the bathmat shuffle
But now you’ll do it slyer

Shuffle down the hall
And hope no one's about
Or shimmy like you don’t care
Shake, dance, belt out

Do the bathmat shuffle
You’re nearly almost there
Made it to the dryer
But the towels are elsewhere

Do the bathmat stumble
Your quads are feeling tight
Eureka in the living room
The end is now in sight

Do the towel toga boogie
Time to celebrate
You could put the towels away
But maybe you’ll just wait

NCL April 2019
Nadia Apr 2019
They put babies in cages,
Sell them to the highest bidders,
Build fences on stolen land.
Is it still a legal agreement if it's in a
Language they couldn't understand?

No permanent harm, they say
Of our earth, crowned in plastic,
Shackled and smothered as well.
When ***** money pays the bills
Can we believe the lies they sell?

The rich get richer,
The planet gets sicker
And the poor struggle to survive.
All these distractions and unfair transactions,
it's a wonder anyone's alive.

If a planet is dying and noone is watching
Does it even make a sound?
If leaders are lying and non complying,
Do treasonous acts abound?
If enough people collaborate and participate
Can we still turn things around?

NCL April 2019
Nadia Aug 2019
When he is in the mood
My son will fill a bucket with berries,
Barely stopping for a taste.
He does not need help
After all, he is five years old,
Tall for his age, strong and determined.
His bucket will overflow before his hands falter.
Or he will run out of berries within reach.
And even then, he will gaze at the ones
Taunting him from high up in the bracken
And imagine flying up there to retrieve them
Or building a robot who can reach.
He will not notice scratches on his golden skin;
His hat will fall off, abandoned.
When the picking is done, buckets overloaded,
Only then will my boy turn to his berries.
He will eat them by the handful,
Staining not just the tips of his fingers,
Making the sounds of a happy bear cub
As he rolls around, content.

My daughter can find blackberries anywhere
Parks, paths, people’s lawns, on the sides of unlikely cliffs
No place is safe from her nose, her eyes, or her 6th sense.
She will reach, graceful and klutzy at the same time,
Stretching skinny arms to pluck berries one by one
Immediately consuming them
She is not rushed but she is efficient
She might take a break to chase a butterfly but she will return.
She is not so little anymore but still cannot be trusted to mind the bucket
As she will then stop picking altogether to guard her hoard poorly
Until she is found, face, hands and hair stained her favourite purple,
Twigs and blackberry remains tangled in her wild curls.
Her eyes, big and sweet and blue, seemingly guileless,
She would swear on unicorns and princesses,
On sparkles and batgirl, but not on her favourite stuffies,
that she has not been eating many berries at all.
And maybe many is hard to quantify for an almost four year old.


NCL September 2018
I wrote this last summer after a long poetry hiatus. Tempted to edit it down but it feels like cheating not to let it stand as it was in that point of time
Nadia May 2019
Baby girl Blue
What happened to you?
Once bold and vibrant
Now you’re subdued
Back in the day
When your laugh was loud
Wearing high, high heels
You would peacock so proud

Those eyes, intense and demanding
In my memories
Blue, you are still outstanding
Full of verve, full of zing
You kick the *** of most anything
Full of colours, full of sound
You’re the lightning, not the ground

Blue, I wish there was another way
Another place, another day
He didn't deserve you
Absorbed your colours
Chained your flare
When I look at you, Blue
It's hard to see
The goddess in there
But I know you can sparkle
And I’d give anything to see you shine
Let me cut the chains
Free your wings
If you're still in there
Show me a sign
Nadia Jul 2019
There were rumours
- the kind whispered
around a campfire
or in bed after lights out -
of a goddess hidden away,
trapped on earth
many centuries ago,
gaze uncovered
so that she might witness
the atrocities of humanity.

If the darkest tales are true,
when the time comes,
when the bindings fail,
when she escapes,
mad with rage,
she will break the earth
and all upon it.

Even so, it is said that
she alone can save us.


NCL July 2019
Nadia Sep 2019
I’ve got my big girl jeans on
And a take no **** smile
I’m ready to kick *** today
Though it has been a while

Go ahead, neg on me
Or anyone else nearby
Come on, show superiority
I’ll show you that won’t fly


NCL September 2019
I might be nervous about today
Nadia May 2019
Our bubbles danced, dipped and dodged
Over the field of wildflowers
Wondrous, magic, rainbow orbs
We could chase and pop them for hours

We like our bubbles massive
Hopelessly trundling around
We like our bubbles tiny
Spinning circles as they surround

She hunts them through the park
She races across the field
I guard the bubble potion
With the bubble wand I wield

We stay until we’re tired
Or the bubbles are all done
Then leave the park contently
After bubble magic fun
Nadia Sep 2019
It's hard to produce a cacophony all by yourself
She was never one to back down from a challenge


NCL September 2019
Nadia May 2019
Sometimes I need to see the ocean
Taste the salt air and feel the motion
Of the waves and the wind
And the world spinning round
When the chaos is too much
The ocean’s where I’ll be found

If I could take a magic potion
Cast a spell or give devotion
Granted any of the powers
That may possibly be
I would quite ecstatically
Transform to a bird of the sea
Nadia Sep 2019
All hail children of the waning summer
Sour and prickly, soft and sweet
These sun-wild children wander free
Blackberry stains on callused feet


NCL September 2019
Nadia Jun 2019
I keep
Telling myself I'm done,
I'm not going to do this anymore
It's a waste of time, waste of energy;
It doesn't feel good; I should stop;
I can stop; I will stop; and
Then I don’t
Nadia Jul 2019
Tucked away from company,
the bag of shame,
where we dump the
ever-replenishing
bowl of misfit stuff
with its leaning tower of
letters and unsolicited magazines,
artwork, small treasures,
confiscated things, and
bits and pieces we might need -
amassed together awaiting
removal or repairs,
a new home of their own,
or to join the drawer of miscellany
and its collection of
eternally optimistic maybes,
better safe than sorries -
really, there’s no need for worries,
it can't hurt to keep it all

Tucked away from every day,
wrapped up in layers of redirection
- no need for locks, secret rooms -
hidden away in plain view
to be exhumed by scent or sight,
by feelings of fright or contentment,
memories of true and untrue
tangle together
really, it's better they do,
it can hurt to keep it all

NCL July 2019
Nadia Sep 2019
i have felt
the rush of blood
pounding in my veins;

surrendered
to over-reaction,
cursing the same


NCL September 2019
Nadia Jul 2019
City trees, weak and stunted,
bear relentless mockery by
country and wild cousins,
though everyone agrees that
suburban trees are least
esteemed, paltry excuses
overcompensating for their
deficits in diversity (of size or
shape) with excess pageantry

The enlightened ones, city and
suburban, wave manicured
tips, speaking in whispered
thrums - how relieved they are
not to be unprotected forest
trees, in constant danger of the
ravages of capitalism and neglect

The forest trees laugh at their
ignorant cousins - they know
the freedom of the wild places
where true peace can be found;
they will gladly face the danger
proudly rooted, in wild ground

The older trees, between naps,
wheeze of many, many
springtimes ago, of cleaner air
and bigger trees, of simpler
lives and clearer skies and
creatures long since gone;
they know change will come,
And change will go, and
Still they will root on

NCL July 2019
Nadia Apr 2019
I am afraid
That when he grows up
He will be someone who can’t accept No
Someone who won’t compromise
Who will take what he wants
If he can’t win it with lies

I am afraid
That he won’t learn how to be gentle
Or when to be gentle
And when to play rough
I want him to know
When to give in
Gracefully
And when to be tough

I am afraid
Of the day he realizes
Superheroes are rare
And people in disguises
Do not always embody
The clothes that they wear

I am afraid
For him
For the things I can’t control
For the doors that close
For the opportunities
I can’t bankroll

These counted fears
And those too ugly to be declared
While they are substantial
I try to remember
Fear and Hope travel paired

NCL April 2019
Nadia May 2019
Dawn snuck ahead
leaving trails of
rainbow dewdrops ablaze

Magic and nature
Exist fearlessly, complemented
by avian soundscape

Solitude hangs softly
temporarily suspending time
and its obligations

Stride after stride
breath after breath
unwinds busy minds

Nature, contemplation accepted
ready to embrace
the new day
Nadia Sep 2019
You release your words
Deliberately;
Measuring each syllable,
Carrying all the consonants,
Gathering up the vowels,
And waiting for the light
Before you cross.
Certain words put a curve
To the shape of your mouth
And your eyes, confidence.

My words are forced unwilling
out the door; each one
pushing on the one ahead,
an unbalanced mass;
tipping forward until they fall
Out in a rush, elbows out,
Knees weaponized;
Falling over each other, still
breathlessly barrelling on.


NCL September 2019
Nadia Jun 2019
It's a two coffee day
At least it’s not four
You might stop me at one
But I always want more
I can wake up without
But it helps me to chill
If I skip blessed coffee
Call a doctor - I'm ill

It’s a four coffee day
Life is kicking my ***
If I swim in caffeine
And hope it will pass
Maybe it can balance
The bad with some good
Jittering my way thru
What I could and I should

It's a six coffee day
You're right, that's insane
Might as well save time
And consume through a vein
It's an eight coffee day
Go ahead, book that hearse
I'm too late for saving
I've succumbed to the curse

NCL 2019
Nadia Apr 2019
Hey big sister
I do think of you
And the magical memories
Of the things we would do
When we were young
When the world wasn’t grey
When things were more simple
When we didn’t have to speak to say
I love you to the stars
I love you to the moon
I love you to infinity
But maybe that's too soon
I know you’re out there
And I hope you’re alright
I can’t love you up close
But I’ll love you despite

NCL April 2019
Nadia Oct 2019
If the clown is a-clowning,
then pay them no mind;
Now is the time to look around
and behind the spectacle
to find the real performance
And the true mastermind
Nadia Jul 2019
Doesn't everyone check
the locks on the children
before bed? And on the
doors asleep in their
bunks? That the
dishwasher has been fed,
the coffee is chugging
along and the cat is ground
for tomorrow. Is that so wrong?

And while we're here in
the kitchen, it's no
trouble to confirm that
the compost is turned off,
the stove doors are shut
tight and the fridge is
secured. Doesn't everyone?
Nadia Oct 2019
Shout into the void
Superfluous offerings
Am I a poet
Nadia May 2019
I love words. I want to eat them. Devour them. Binge on them and hoard each delicious morsel. I will sneak them and steal them. Find them abandoned in ordinary places and take them in.

I want to live these words, these stories. Fly on the wings of dragons. Be the dragon. I want to absorb the words and feel them. Break my heart, shatter it. Slowly sink into loneliness and despair. Find hope and embrace her. I want to fall in love a million times, a million different ways.

I want to be, if only temporarily, a million different people. I am a princess. I am a knight. I am a super hero swooping in wingless flight. I am a phoenix exploding from my ashes. I am a general directing spaceship clashes.

Feel my fury, feel my compassion, feel these feelings I can't action. Until it is tim,e once again, to be regular everyday me.
Nadia Jul 2019
Gave myself a pep talk,
Half-hearted, it fell on
Firmly skeptical ears

Both I and myself, we knew
Myself had no intention
Of following through

Yet somehow here I am;
Not with boasts or swagger,
Not with any shade of confidence

Resigned and willing,
Doggedly, pleasantly persisting,
I am here against my own bad sense
Nadia Jul 2019
Unzipping the small pocket
(the one like a clothing pocket)
Of the empty luggage
Sliding a tentative hand within
Hoping not to find anything
From the last trip
Or even before then
Especially nothing that decomposed
Or worse yet, something alive
An unfortunate rodent
Or unidentified colony of creepy crawlers
Alive or dead, it's something I dread
Maybe I should buy another...


NCL July 2019
Nadia May 2019
Everything we do is wrong
There’s no win to be found
We’re polluting the air,
The oceans, the ground
Our bags are a problem
and our coffee cups ****
The clothes that we wear
Show we don’t give a ****
About the environment
Or the next generations
This single use planet
Has too many temptations
Nadia Oct 2019
let go
twirl
and twirl
and twirl

flutter, tip, tumble

whirling
swirling
floating
flying

spin, spin, spin

dive down
veer up
slide over
dive in

softly settle, dream



NCL October 2019
Nadia Sep 2019
The cat saunters through
Orange, brown and white,
Large, fluffy, and regal;
She might hypnotize you
With her glowing, green sight

She’ll sniff you, dainty-like
If you compliment her suitably,
She’ll rub up against you
With a cat hug
Leaving cat love and fur

She might accept
A chin scratch,
Also an ear scratch,
Maybe a sweeping pet
- no, you’re not done yet

Then she’ll flop
to the ground, like a hippo
Going down in slow-mo
It’s an alarming show
but she’s quite fine

Now it’s time
There’s her tummy
(It’s white and velvety)
She’ll stretch backwards
Into a donut shape
So you can scratch
That belly properly

But it’s a trick you see
Soon enough,
She can’t help herself
And your hand becomes
Her enemy
Nadia Jun 2019
You are fifteen, feeling unloved and unseen; aching for wild romance as curated on screen. It's not your fault, you’ve been told it's your right - you deserve love at first sight, swept away by a jedi knight, with your ample hair shining rainbow bright - of course reason takes flight when confronted with the fantasy of love.

Although you should know, over your lifetime, again and again, love will come or love will grow. It may take time before it shows, it’s never owed and hard to sow but you will find love or love will find you.

At times you will curse love - when it comes for you it won’t be denied; you can try to save your pride, set love aside, maybe chase it away with truth or with lies, but you can never hide. Love won’t let you be rid of it at your own will; you can say that you're out but still it will pull you in until love is fulfilled or love is killed....

But you are fifteen, feeling unloved and unseen, and I want you to know, as I wish I had known, love is a wildcard. When you want love too bad, you’ll try way too hard, you’ll lose your perspective, settling for pyrite stars who find you easy to discard; no matter how much you stay on guard, you’ll end up disappointed and scarred...

And that is ok, you will learn and you will burn; you will get stronger and smarter, you’ll know when to give up and when to try harder. You’ll discover your awesome self - and that is a true gift - when you know what makes you happy, what gives you a lift, what helps you grow, what makes you crazy; someday you’ll know you are loved
Nadia May 2019
If I am spinning past
Removing the old and broken
While organizing mayhem
Take care!

If I am whirling about
A mad cyclone imposing order
Finding things that- I can’t even...
Run!

If I am asking questions
Of objects or empty rooms
Assigning motives and guilt
Watch out!

I am fighting chaos
It's easier than giving in
Nadia May 2019
There's never been a silence
She hasn't felt compelled to fill
In the quiet there’s a violence
Inducing impromptu words to spill

She will never favour speaking
She would love to undershare
When the silence starts shrieking
She hopes they've words to spare

Any pause in conversation
An impressive act of will
A study in frustration
A lull she’d love to ****

She'd love to sit silent as a rock
To possess some small mystique
Without a burning need to talk
Letting all her secrets leak

Please show her some mercy
Take your share of the burden
No need for controversy
Just a moment to put your word in
Nadia Jun 2019
When you say
the words of another
in your own mind,
you might be surprised to find
where they resonate;
how the words equate
when they reflect your history,
becoming something new,
for only you, to relate
- to embrace or reject -
this is now your mess,
best get on with it....
Nadia Apr 2019
For the love and the likes, the attention, the spikes of adrenaline; for validation in creation, a brief vacation from every day, I want to say...

NCL April 2019
Nadia Jun 2019
Almond Butter, you would have tricked me. It is not you I seek but the contraband comforts of another, my love Peanut Butter. Our sordid affair, a shameful deceit - I hide it away but the lure is too complete to ignore. I can’t desist, I won’t make empty promises; I will accept the warm embrace of no other.

NCL 2019
Nadia May 2019
I strip myself bare, exposing every weakness, every secret I hold dear. You don’t notice.

I break myself down; I am countless pieces that won't fit back together again. You didn't hear my call.

I bleed for you; it isn't enough. It's never enough. I will always give you more than I can afford to lose.
Nadia Sep 2019
Wasted space
Weak; no base
I am the solitary shoelace
Love finding random bits and pieces in old notebooks. wish I could remember what prompted this scribble.
Nadia Aug 2019
Flying down hills on our bikes
Wind in our lemon streaked hair
Whooping through
Lips slicked with cherry smackers

We imagined the glamourous
Lives we would lead some day
The world was ours
For the summer
Nadia May 2019
The cat would like to make it known
That the conditions in her drop zone
Have not been sufficiently attended
As such, her visits are now suspended

Of course, she didn’t say it with a note
Feline communication can be cutthroat
No texts, no gestures, no logical clues
She left a warm “present” in vacant shoes

A warning, a show of superb restraint,
If things don’t improve post-this complaint
If her privy is not lavishly filled
The cat will show she’s not just one-skilled

Her range is amazing, very precise
She doesn’t go big, when small will suffice
She hopes that her message is well received
And improvements are directly achieved
FU
Nadia Jul 2019
FU
Stop - I don’t want to talk to you
Your kind of crazy is contagious
I remember too well the girls like you
Unprovoked fits, erupting rampageous

You’re not a little girl, so cut the ****,
Even if you utter threats and swear
Just because you’ve lowered yourself
Doesn’t mean I have to join you there
Nadia May 2019
In that moment she transforms
Unquenchable pressures rise
Rage flares into firestorms
Fury thrives, amplifies

She dances on recent slights
Flinging words of blistering flame
Fires fuelled from yesterday’s fights
She wields with unerring aim

When the fury burns to embers
When logic eventually returns
No one left remembers
The cause of her righteous burns

NCL May 2018
Nadia Apr 2019
You will be told how to be less
Except they won’t say it that way
They will tell you to
Play nice
Compromise
Make space
Make sure everyone is alright
And don’t make a scene

They will tell you to be
Pretty and cute
Kind and sweet
And smart
But don't show off
Or get big ideas

They will tell you to be
Popular and likeable
But modest and prim

They will tell you to be
So many claustrophobic impossible things

They are wrong
They don’t get to decide
Who you are
Or how you are

You are allowed to exist
If the space they leave
Isn’t the right size or shape
Give yourself permission
Take what you need
Be what you need

Give yourself permission
Be strong and smart
Play rough or messy
Show off
Have big ideas
Disagree
Be extreme
Or complicated
Or any of the things
You want to be

Protect yourself
Even when it means
You have to make a scene
Yell, argue or even scream
Please don't be afraid
Or do be afraid
But do it anyway

Next time they tell you
How to be
You are allowed to
Ignore them

NCL April 2019
Nadia Apr 2019
You may be told to be less
Or that you are less
And should accept less
Because you don't need more
They want you to think
You don't deserve more

They are wrong

You deserve everything
You are not less
You never were

You are infinite things

Next time they tell you
How to be less
Don’t listen

NCL 2019
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