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Apr 2019 · 96
Like a Crane
Shaddox Apr 2019
Eponymous to an eternal spring,
Cranes cry and spread their wings,
In the lake's reflection that freezes time,
My reflection gets ever older, like wine.

As their wings flutter and flutter,
My knees have become soft as butter.
When they come to drink its water,
The lake blesses them with youth again
And as they leave and build their nests,
My reflection ages with unrest.

As I lay my pained back to a willow,
And I sit on the soft ground,
The lake begins to whisper:
"My gift is not for you, my friend
For you are a stranger,
And all my friends that come to visit,
Perhaps once, every year,
They let me know that man is not yet initiated
In the beauty of the song of the wind ."

Enlightened, I lift myself from the ground,
There is only silence. I think I have become deaf,
The wind gently touches my face, in regret,
Again, I stare at my reflection, forever still,
And again, it's getting older, only this time,
It is also getting ill.
This time, under the graceful muse of inspiration, I decided to have an extra character.
Jan 2019 · 308
False Creeds
Shaddox Jan 2019
All my life I searched for someone to follow,
Which left me feeling a bit hollow.

I long searched for a leader,
One who will not throw away life that is eager,
But like ever-growing  weeds,
Those who know of me, will change their creeds,
And they will give me a taste of power,
Then my ****** mind will be overpowered.

Sooner or later, a partisan I will become,
A small token,  ready to be thrown,
At a poker table of those with power,
Am I brave, or am I a coward?

I share no such ideal,
Nor any desire of power.
As long as wine will be made,
And I have a mouth to drink it,
I want to listen to the birds sing,
And observe as the world is baptized in fire.
A poem about false creeds and false leaders.
Aug 2018 · 175
Meeting despair
Shaddox Aug 2018
Chest pains are starting,
The signs are here again,
Oh dear pain, how I missed you,
You love me in spite of my disdain.

Lead becomes my blood,
My sight becomes a little hazy,
The sun is burning my skin,
But the creek water still feels amazing.
Birds are singing my certain defeat,
Winds accompany the leaven choir,
The stone steps are revigorating,
But my condition remains dire.

Have no mercy, my dear conductor,
I'm not going anywhere.
Running away, after all, seems useless,
If you're in the middle of nowhere.

So let me die,
And let me die some more,
And let my body feed your children,
And sate the thirst of doves.
Feb 2018 · 496
Winter Phoenix
Shaddox Feb 2018
Snowflakes drawn the curtain,
The wind mutes everything in sight,
I shiver, knowing what is coming,
Whips of frost begin to strike.

My eyes have become mute,
Everything twists in a whirling haze,
The pain does not echo in my heart,
For it has become a burning blaze.

There is no such thing as a phoenix of ice,
Waiting to splendidly be reborn,
As this frozen flame inside of me,
Simply cannot burn.

All that is left to do,
Is to wait for an end to come trough,
Thoughts of light, hopes of fire,
Let them guide my last desire:
Let me die, as many times as needed,
My next life has already been seeded.
Jan 2018 · 185
Path of Drunken Haze
Shaddox Jan 2018
In this pleasant, drunken haze,
My senses have sharpened,
I can smell the sandalwood,
And the falling cherry blossoms.

I can hear the water falling,
Under the passage of time,
Too majestic to care or feel,
About the rot in my mind.

I can see the birds are here,
Sparrows, cranes and swallowtails,
They are here, like me as well,
To enjoy this beautiful spectacle.

My wine is almost over,
So I begin to meditate,
Over which path I will walk,
One leads to self-destruction,
The other leads in the dark.
Shaddox Dec 2017
The cold winter wind,
Put you and me together,
Staring at the same bonfire,
With hearts burning like embers.

The landscape is still,
Only you and me animate it,
The grey sky smells like paint,
Tainted by the setting sun,
The bonfire, ever burning...

A wolf howls in the distance,
Of this beautiful, still, painting,
He dares not approach,
Your beauty must not be tainted.

I can go or I can rest,
The choice matters not,
As long as youre here, with me,
The bonfire shall shine on.
Dec 2017 · 277
Shaddox Dec 2017
The cold cobblestone reminds me,
Of these shackles to which I'm chained,
I was a simple, naive child,
That chose to be in pain.

My back is hurting,
And Im looking forward to the end,
This moss on which I'm sitting,
Is my best and only friend.

A spider rests on my face,
With mercy, he wants to end me,
His bite is warm, merciful and small,
The venom embraces.

Alas, there is no hope in sight,
I let the pain embrace me.
Slowly, eroding my sanity,
I'm waiting, waiting, waiting...
Dec 2017 · 239
Last Breath
Shaddox Dec 2017
I walk forward trough the snow,
It deafens everything but my steps.
The moonlight pierces darkness,
So hopeless, hopeless, hopeless...

It has now started snowing,
Snowflakes darker than the night,
They prance around, with no sound,
Engulfing me.

They have gently grasped my neck,
And with just the slightest grip,
Breath is now leaving my body,
It's leaving as if trying to sing.

They gathered around my feet,
But I know there is nowhere to go,
I accept that there is no kinder fate,
Than one in a tomb of black snow.
Dec 2017 · 342
The Search
Shaddox Dec 2017
Lost in a sea of trees,
Leaves cry at my feet,
The wind howls in the distance,
I cannot find what I seek.

A vicious howl echoes in the distance,
My heartbeat just grows faster,
And fiercer,
With absolute persistence.

Where have you gone?
I have looked all over,
No stone left unturned,
No insect has spoken.

I now reached a cliff...
There is nowhere else to look.
The roaring sea told me it has seen you,
But I'm too scared to look.

One step forward,
Is all it takes to meet you again,
One step onward,
And our feelings will be in vain.
Nov 2017 · 283
The Mechanical Dragon
Shaddox Nov 2017
The dragon sits, above the cliff,
Keeping guard above the village,
His heart, forever stiff,
He's aware that he can pillage.

So he armored his core forever,
Hiding his pain in plain sight,
The love and trust he built in aeons,
Burned in flames forever white.

He still has hope,
He still has dreams,
He can still see into the forever,
And that, perhaps, makes him
More human than ever.

So I bring this edifice, to the dragon,
Forever keeping watch on me,
I am grateful, oh so grateful,
For him listening to my plea.
Dedicated to my great friend Pyrhos.
Nov 2017 · 349
My dearest
Shaddox Nov 2017
I look up to you,
From this humble earth,
The distance between us ever-growing,
My heart increasing in pulse.

I let the days pass by,
Waiting for the nights,
So I can see you my dearest,
Shining bright.

I have found my clearest moment,
Where all reason and logic flew away,
All that is remaining,
Is a pain that eats away.

So I walk to the cliff,
Staring at you, my dearest star,
The wind gives me the final push,
And I fall, fall, fall..

My sight never leaves you,
This is the happiest I have ever been,
I want you to look at me forever,
As I find the gesture bittersweet.
Nov 2017 · 235
Release from Pain
Shaddox Nov 2017
I shriek, I cry, I wallow,
And nobody is here to listen,
Disturbed echoes of my voice,
Only to me they whisper.

Dark snowflakes fall from the sky,
Snowflakes that only I can see,
They prance around,
Joy unbound,
With intentions as light as linden.

The pain is too much.

As my mind finally breaks,
Like a willow branch in a merciless wind,
I surrender my mind and my body,
To the sky, yet unseen.
Nov 2017 · 256
My Goddess
Shaddox Nov 2017
Somewhere, in a hidden mountain village,
Where only the initiates could find,
Bards have never found this muse,
A goddess of grain and wine.

She lives in eternal joy,
Dances, sings and plays all day,
With her sadness hidden,
Deep in her,
For mortals,
It is too far away.

Many court her,
Yet her heart belongs to the faithful,
That can unwind,
The many mysteries hidden,
Within grain and wine.
Nov 2017 · 259
Shaddox Nov 2017
His eyes reap lightning,
His sight sparks light.
The graceful, noble warrior,
Sits, resting, in delight.

The cherry flowers fall for him,
Crowning him the victor.
He fought and fought well,
To enjoy this liquor.

To some it is bitter,
To others, it is sweet.
For him, the taste is abstract,
A taste that reaps melancholy.

Longer is now the road to home,
Because of his injuries,
Longer is the road to death,
Because he is now crowned victor,
The liquor tastes like nothing now,
But simple, soothing freedom.
Nov 2017 · 335
Lost love
Shaddox Nov 2017
There's that small refuge we always had,
Hidden between the old willow trees,
Where sparrows, swallows and magpies,
Rest their tired, restless wings.

How we always met there,
Is a secret just between you and me,
And the sparrows, and the swallows,
And the old willow trees.

A sacred feeling bound us,
When we held our hands,
The wind always conspired in our favor,
When leaves were magnetized in your hair,
Giving you unparalleled beauty,
Giving you vibrant color,
That not even painters could dream.

I am now alone,
The snow drowns my weeps,
The willow trees are sleeping
And the sparrows,
And the swallows,
And the magpies,
Are nowhere to be seen.

For sure, our love was pure,
And for certain, I shall see you again
When the cold wind stops its cries,
When you will awake the sleeping willow trees,
And when the sparrows,
And when the swallows,
And when the magpies,
Will rest their restless wings again.
Nov 2017 · 152
A moment of binding
Shaddox Nov 2017
Standing by a crystal lake,
With the surface as still as time,
I gazed into the reflection's soul,
The same time it stared into mine.

As the moon fell down the sky,
As slow as an autumn leaf,
It crept its way into the painting,
Making the two of us feel complete.

A gush of wind suddenly came,
Revealing the fragility of our bond,
Leaving the both of us,
Simple vagabonds.

Conceding, I walk away,
On a path only by me explored,
Whether our fates will ever cross again,
Nor you or I will ever know.

The wind is gushing again,
Disturbing the serenity of willows,
They sing, and sing again,
About the love they just witnessed.
Nov 2017 · 178
The Warrior
Shaddox Nov 2017
With sparks in his eyes,
And his sight fierce as a tiger,
The warrior can finally relax,
After strife as ripe as thunder.

His mind endlessly rewinds,
Images of his beautiful sword play,
That come as fast,
As cherry blossoms like to end.

He is not happy nor sad,
Or at least, that's what he would say,
But despite his injuries,
He can fight another day.

He can't tell when his end will come,
Cherry blossoms wash away his worries,
With an endless cup of wine in his hands,
He waits for his well earned glory.
Nov 2017 · 239
Code of Silence
Shaddox Nov 2017
I was drawn into the silence,
Like a carrot draws a hare,
I can't hear it,
Nor can I see it,
I simply know it's there.

The oaks let me know of a secret path,
They move and make me way,
Because we share the pain of silence,
The pain that will never go away.

I arrived to a lake of silence,
Where frogs sing their agony,
Where leaves float, far apart,
Where willows hide their apathy.
I stare into the surface.
A humble reflection stares back at me.
We understand each other,
For we both know,
Silence in agony.
Nov 2017 · 654
Shaddox Nov 2017
I can hear you calling out to me,
Like a sailor hears the cries of the sea,
Like a seagull, or like a sparrow,
In the warmth of the sea breeze.

There are no trees, nor snow,
So I don't know what time it is,
The sand is eternal,
But for the traces it leaves.

I can hear your cries again,
And I cannot resist no more.

So please embrace me,
I am yours!
Have some mercy,
Before we go,
Let me hear the roar of the sea,
Once more.

— The End —