You were always loving me "despite"
I needed you to love me "because"

I asked my dad to lend me one of his hats
I got Booked for a part in a popular tv show as a field worker
How about that?
It’s perfect. That’s where I come from
In the early morning hours he stopped by my home and left me one of his favorite sombreros and a small lemon cake
The memories lemon cake brings are bittersweet
Years ago, when I was a kid and I was too high, lemon cake was the only thing I could eat
Now it’s the life I grow inside of me’s favorite treat
Feelings that a lemon cake could bring
Are tangy but sweet
Like my adolescence
I take a bite and memories surrender
And they’re welcomed,
I’m grateful to be able to remember
Where I come from.

Ayer conosci el Poderoso Kambo
En una ceremonia, es veneno lo que te estan dando
Desde la espalda de una rana, tres puntitos a mi piel, vomito y me sana
Sana sana espaldita de rana
Te doy las gracias
Hoy me desperte con ganas
Y en mis sueños recorde esas memorias Lindas
Que atraves de trauma, tristesa, y abuso a ambos se nos olvida
Respiro profundo
Aire libre
Ranita venenosa tu medicina me sirve
Y por hoy vivire en el lla y en el presente
Algo que no e podido hacer ni tener en mente.

Labor pain
I write this through a haze
Going in and out remembering grey days

I woke up from a dream
Where I had to fend from three
They didn’t even know me
I was only 13

Labor pain
I’ve moved past the blame
But how can make sure
You’re Journey doesn’t go the same?

I wanna protect you from  the world
But the world taught me
It is what you make it
When I was only 15

Labor pain
This is my labor pain
I’ve cut the chord
So you won’t have to feel my shame

Labor pain
This is my own labor pain
It’s not yours
I’m doing the best I can
To make sure your playground is free rein

The birds and the bees
Morning electric
Afternoon zzzz’s
Temptation is the greatest treason
I’m trying to do the all the right things for the wrong reasons
Because you and me
We were epistolary
All the poems you wrote me
Hollow letters with no ink.
You say it was fun
I know it was fate
This is the last letter
I won’t sign it with hate
But if I never see you again,
It’ll be too soon
To get close to my heart
You’ll have to rip it from the ******* moon

Those who seek clarity,
The purity of the mind
Beyond the science, beyond the lies
Leaving all facts behind

For what you are exists right here
For what you have arrived
What if you feel the way I do
For nothing but for mankind

Be known for being, not for doing
For saving yourself around to find

For what exists right here
For what you have arrived
What if you feel the way I do
For nothing but mankind

An artist with mad composition
A confused disposition
Double the list of failed repetitions
With pencil in hand, I looked at you.
I began.

And drew
pictures of what your insides might look like. Black and green, Strokes of yellow and tangerine
Like LA skies
I saw you in a dream
Now you’re right before my eyes
And I close. with pencil in hand
I began,
And drew
pictures of possible futures if you decided to hang
And drew
pictures of me with neatly ******* hands
Behind my back
With pencil in hand I drew your eyes looking at
Me.
Piercing
Unconditionally
If the divine did lead me
Double the reason
To have you in me
Deeply.
I had a muse I can use, with pencil in hand
I began
And drew
peaceful days with you by my side
And drew wild *** parties, ****** and chicken thighs
And drew you with me
And drew pictures of what that could mean
doesn’t matter to me
So long I see you in peace
So long I have with me
A pencil in hand, some paper
And so I began