The world needs an Italian grandmother Dispensing wisdom and clarity by the cup With a gentle slap across the back of the head Followed by a simple utterance, smarten up
So many events have occurred For reasons we cannot conjure a clue That someone from the future has never intervened Tells me time travel can never be true
News media, print media, social media, so many voices All striving to speak truth to power Believing they are worthy of the final destination Their prestigious ivory tower
With cancel culture and the banning of words Free speech is being put in its place When comedians can no longer make a joke Now that's a real slap in the face
All the social media companies in the world Unfortunately had to react They handed all the people a pen and a paper And decided hey, you can't write that
Many humans have a fascination with wines Consumption of them is their great escape I'm just an old Coca Cola drinker To me they're just a bunch of old grapes
I've notice there are very few God jokes Why do comedians let that subject be God graciously gave us a great sense of humor Why would God forbid the use against thee
I long for the days before the Internet When ignorance was bliss and life was carefree Now with every ache and pain, I've become aware Of just how many diseases it could be
Have you looked at the automobiles in a parking lot lately All the makes and models look the same We are all the victims of conformity And we only have ourselves to blame
They say the early bird gets the worm I believe that is certainly true for some Sure, there are certain advantages Stealing your neighbors newspaper for one
There are many advocates for voting rights They say, more people voting, the better in touch Although when it comes to voting for abortion rights Wouldn't you know it? Maybe not so much
So big tech, the media, and Democrates will team up They will be the arbiters of what is now true These television and print journalists will all be cheering Not realizing they'll be a day they come for you
President Putin has always had a plan to extricate himself In case he was unable to take this hill He will claim victory by eliminating the Nazis As he sticks the rest of the world with the bill
Face protection is no longer required For the returning congregation on Sunday Morning Everything seems to be back to normal Without the ability to conceal the yawning
Imagine when scientists find the center of the universe And how does all this space and time fit Watch for the surprise of the politicians when they realize That they are not the center of it
The most precious commodity in the world is time As you grow older this gets easier to admit So young people please don't go to your grave Realizing you've spent colossal amounts wasting it
Hail to the famous writers and commentators With the courage for which it employs To stand up against real evil All those old cartoons and children's toys
All this talk about genders is a bit confusing All emotions have been torn But then again, I was a man trapped in a woman's body Until the day I was born
I think restaurants should have menus offered in braille So the blind can have a meal They can now choose anything they want Depending on how they feel
Most people speak when they should be listening More thought should be promoted Better that your silence be misinterpreted Then for you to be misquoted
Approximately 1 million dogs in the US are named as heirs Inheriting millions after their owners pass away Now it does seem a bit ironic Since dogs rest in peace every day
When you remember a past event The actual event you do not recall Your brain is remembering the last time you remembered it So perhaps it never happened at all
Well you believe you have written a lousy poem So you throw it into the trash on the spot Please go and retrieve it For it's called, garbage can, not garbage cannot
Nature seems to be a very happy place With birds chirping and frogs croaking everything is fine Although there are some sad moments Of course when willows are weeping and grapes turn to whine
The famous line from the play Julius Caesar, "And you, Brutus" Shakespeare wrote for emotion and stark What Julius Caesar actually said was, You to, my child" Followed by Oh, now that's going to leave a mark
Unfortunately, I have come to the conclusion That the human race has come to terms That we forced ourselves to this sterile life And now are prisoners to the smallest germs
If you are killed while working for the government Determine assassination or ****** is what we face Do we consider your grand significance or influence Or should it be more about job title and salary based
There should be just two countries in the world One for us optimist, dreamers, and strivers to do well A much larger one is needed for pessimists and Debby downers Because doom and gloom is much easier to sell
Being of small stature I had to be much smarter Many arguments and disagreements I had to quell Because finding myself in a fair fight Means I really didn't plan it very well
Just a year ago the media was all upset about bullying Lots of finger pointing and blaming But now, they're pushing hard the covid rules They claim not bullying, it's shaming
Never dismiss the thoughts of the elderly For their words and wisdom you can trust Because even a mop that is never used Will still continue to collect dust
I am pretty much a laid back kind of guy Even keeled and doing well But I'd have to say I think I'm more like a duck Calm on the surface but actually, paddling like hell