I hate me, I hate everything about me,
The things you can see, and especially those you can't see,
I hate living, getting up every day,
Make money, they say, gotta get paid,
But I can barely stand up in my own skin,
How do I help others, when I can't begin,
I'm stuck like cement in my own body,
And I wanna **** it sometimes, don't tell Mommy,
She's still traumatized,
From all the other times,
I downed a bottle of pills,
Hoping I'd get out of this place,

So someone help me, help me live,
Because it can't always be like like this,
I'm drowning in my own self-loathing,
It's like a permanent set of clothing,
I can't get away from me,
So someone, help me, help me,

I've been reaching for a hand to pull me out for so long,
I'll just keep it hanging here, until I've had enough,
Lonely as the last of their own species,
No one else like me, I guarantee this freely,
Haunted by my childhood, and the demon that possess it,
Caught up in my own head, and all of it's dumb ****,
I can't see two steps ahead, sometimes I can't even see one,
God whoever made me, I hope they were having fun,
To make my pathetic existence worth something at least,
Even if just a stain on some old *** sheets,

So someone help me, help me live,
Because it can't always be like like this,
I'm drowning in my own self-loathing,
It's like a permanent set of clothing,
I can't get away from me,
So someone, help me, help me.

When I'm feeling ***** because of what you did,
When I feel grungy cause of the things you said,
Because you were the greatest actress of them all,
And here I am taking your well deserved fall,
Sitting in my misery and pain and disgust,
While you sit pretty on your throne made of rust,
Because you're rotting from the inside,
And soon there will be no where left to hide,
From who you are, who you really are,
And I'll be over here, not giving one care,

Come feel ***** like me,
And then maybe you'll see,
Why I do what I do to not be me,
Yeah maybe then my Momma will see,
Why I'd rather get on my knees,
For some ***** *** ****,
Than think about for a moment or two,
What you made me do to you,

I'm crawling through this life covered in the past,
Can't seem to shake it, no matter how much time does pass,
But that's okay, because I know you're dying inside,
While you live you're perfect little life,
Hiding secrets so deep, it must be burning you alive,
I tried to **** myself so many times,
Did you ever wonder if it was because of you?
Was there ever a shred of guilt inside of you?
One day I hope your house of glass shatters,
And you get cut to pieces and left in tatters,

Come feel ***** like me,
And then maybe you'll see,
Why I do what I do to not be me,
Yeah maybe then my Momma will see,
Why I'd rather get on my knees,
For some ***** *** ****,
Than think about for a moment or two,
What you made me do to you.

How can I know where I'm going, when no one will tell me where I come from?
And I know, I know, I know, so many times, I've said I was done,
Done living, done trying to be the person everyone wants me to be,
Because everyone's short-sighted and just can't see it's killing me,
To try to be bigger than I am, because I'm small and weak,
I'm needy in my begging for someone to comfort me when I try to sleep,
Because I just keep seeing visions of my demon night after night,
And I just can't keep going on like this, I'm running out of fight,

So someone help me please, I need a hand,
Because I've found myself sinking into quick sand,
And I can't seem to pull myself out,
So I'll pull you in with me too,
Because two is less lonely,
When your drowning so slowly,

I tried so hard to be the woman who was raised by two strong people,
And I don't if it's not in my DNA, or I was just beat down at too young an age,
But I can't seem to stand taller than my shadow that's weighing me down,
Choking me slowly, and fighting me without a single sound,
So I'll wage these wars inside my head and burn my cells,
From the inside out, standing here pretending it's all okay still,
But it's not, it's not, it's not okay, I'm not okay,
and I'm really scared, when I'm alone, I'm really afraid,

So someone help me please, I need a hand,
Because I've found myself sinking into quick sand,
And I can't seem to pull myself out,
So I'll pull you in with me too,
Because two is less lonely,
When your drowning so slowly.

If I were to die tomorrow,
You wouldn't pause with sorrow,
Because you'd know your secrets died,
In my brain, and there they'll lie,
Buried underneath my skin,
Burned in my fingertips,
And they scorch with their fire,
Calling out to scream "LIAR,"
You were not a big sister, but a massive fraud,
One who pulled the wool over many's eyes like a shawl,
And now I'm falling deeper into my insanity,
Questioning what was once my reality,
Because surely an angel with spun gold hair,
Couldn't have done what you did with no care?
For how this would effect me for the rest of my life,
And I can tell you with certainty it's caused untold strife,
Now I can't even hear a single word that reminds me,
And conjures an image of you in my brain to see,

Because you are a demon in sheep's clothing,
Waiting to prey on innocent children with self-loathing,
I was just a young child on the outside of it all,
But you made me feel like it was okay to fall,
And so I free dived into the abyss,
And now I'm more ****** up than I can admit,

It's all because you told me don't tell your parents,
And I went along with it, I swallowed all the ****,
You fed me day after day, you manipulative *****,
I hope one day it all catches up to your conscious,
Because right now all I see is me hating me,
And you sitting oh so comfortable and pretty,
Up on your mountain that's so high,
Looking down on all us who would've died,
To do what you said, follow you with blind eyes,
Because you sugar coated all your lies,
And I followed a possessed person over the edge,
And now I'm standing, I've been standing on a ledge,
Deciding do I jump off and see where I land,
Or step back on to safer and more stable ground?
Because now I'm stuck with the feeling of chopping,
Off my own hand to get off the feel of your moaning,
So where do I go from here?
How do I move out of reverse gear?

Because you are a demon in sheep's clothing,
Waiting to prey on innocent children with self-loathing,
I was just a young child on the outside of it all,
But you made me feel like it was okay to fall,
And so I free dived into the abyss,
And now I'm more ****** up than I can admit.

I'm sorry I became so broken,
I guess that's what happens when you just don't notice,
That your child is hurting,
That inside she's screaming,
For someone to save her,
Save her from herself,
Rescue her from the demon,
That lived in the house,
That was just next door,
A couple of steps, no more,
But you didn't help her,
You didn't save her,
And now she's shattered,
Now she's glass on pavement,
Never to be put back together,
And now no one can save her,

(Save her, save her, save her.)

I cried and cried,
And I tried that night,
To tell you how ****** my life,
Had become, but I couldn't find the knife,
In my back to pull out,
To get the words out,
So now I'm just as broken as the porcelain doll,
In my childhood basement, rotting on the floor,

I tried so hard, Ma, I tried so hard,
To be so normal, but I just couldn't,
All I could think of was how to get out,
How to not scream, how to not shout,
About how unfair the cards I'd been dealt,
Cause yeah I always was reminded they weren't the worst,
But what no one ever one told me, no one ever said,
Was that hey baby girl, they still aren't the best,
So I tried to piece myself together,
Stitch by stitch, but I just keep breaking further,
Because I needed someone,
I needed anyone,
To tell me I'm not alone,
To let me know I don't have to be done,
That there's another way out besides dying,
You don't have to be in your room by yourself crying,
So why did no one save her, save me,
Why did no one save that girl, why did no one save me?

(Save me, save me, save me?)

I tried that night,
I cried and cried,
To tell you how ****** my life,
Had become, but I couldn't find the knife,
In my back to pull out,
To get the words out,
So now I'm just as broken as the porcelain doll,
In my childhood basement, rotting on the floor.

You keep fighting your imaginary demons,
Well I'll be here fighting my very much so real ones,
They stalk me in the night time,
They cling to me in day time,
They're my shadow when I don't have one on the ground,
And they are the thoughts that I have to keep shooting down,
Or else I might just wind up on the side of the road,
Bullet in my skull, feet covered in roses,
Because if I'm going out, I'm going out in style,
And with nothing less than a smile,

Because I was here, and I was tainted,
And I was naive once, before she was created,
So here I am ***** and used,
Waiting for someone to look at me like I'm new,

I once believe everything that came out of everyones mouth daily,
But I haven't been like that since the snap of a cameras lens,
Since the sound of my childhood crashing and burning,
On the ground, ashes scattered, each one a lesson I was learning,
A hard fought battle I had won, and now I'm damaged goods,
No good to anyone, except to be tossed aside and abused,
Because you're a con artist,
And let's not forget a *******,
A demoness who prays on children with her golden hair,
Made out of lies that have been prepared,

I was here, and I was tainted,
And I was naive once, before she was created,
So here I am ***** and used,
Waiting for someone to look at me like I'm new,

I'm here, I'm tainted,
I'm still naive, even after all that she created,
I'm here ***** and used,
Just tell me, just look at me like I'm new.

This monster called guilt, is eating me alive,
And I'm telling you this, so one day, when I've died,
You don't have sit there and wonder all the reasons why,
It's her, it's me, it's all the things I did hide,
Because of the shame and the regret,
And the things in between that I sat,
Upon for years that made me bleed,
Until I choked upon their ashes in my head,
And you all rationalized it away,
The rage and the self-hate,
But it all came down to, it all comes down to,
To a basement and carpet stains on the ground,

Someone help me end this living nightmare,
Where I'm haunted by a demon with golden hair,
She said to trust her and touch her there,
Well I did, and I did, now I hate her,
But not as much as I hate myself,
And no one can take away how I feel,

Sunshine shone in from that tiny window underground,
But all I could concentrate on was the sounds,
That came out of your filthy mouth,
And now I'm just on a one way train that's bound,
For hell, just like you, so eternity it is,
With the devil stuck in my head,
But I deserve no less for what I did,
They say it's cycle, yes, that's what they said,
But I'll never do it again,
But she, I'm sure, she did,
So who's worse or any better really in the end?
The one who learned their lesson, or the one who never did?

Someone help me end this living nightmare,
Where I'm haunted by a demon with golden hair,
She said to trust her and touch her there,
Well I did, and I did, now I hate her,
But not as much as I hate myself,
And no one can take away how I feel.