I wondered as a child
when I would grow up
but now I wish I could
be a child again. Childhood
is the best, one can do
everything they want.

Those little mischiefs we
used to do, how we used
to try to not go to school.
The sweet sleep on our
mother’s lap was the
best phase of childhood.

The pampering we got,
how we cried over small
things as a child, the
nursery rhymes we used to
read and those countless memories.
Those were the days we all
cherished and wish they came back again.

We used to hold fingers
of our parents if we went
everywhere and random people
would just pull our cheeks,
and how we used to feel
shy and then smile afterwards.

As we all grew up,
now we all crave to
go back to those days,
once again cherish those memories,
an one last nap on mother’s lap
is the last thing we wish for.

I can't be like someone else.
We all are made different.
Someone is good in studies,
someone in sports, someone in dance.
So, please don't try to make me
a all- rounder in everything.

When everyone is different
then why compare me with
someone else? Yes, someone can
get 92, 95 or more marks but I
know I am not capable for such marks.

Yes someone can get 97% in boards
but I know I cannot. You all don't
even know what happens to me because
of this. Whenever you compare me with someone else,
it feels like I am good for nothing.

I just begin to hate myself.
The confidence which I had before is now lost in me. I want
to participate in sports, take part
in elocutions, debates but if I do then
you all wouldn't even let one chance go of scolding me.

Sometimes I just feel stuck.
I never used to have anxiety attacks
but now I fear, I am afraid that if I
cannot score good marks then you would
scold me a lot and again compare me
with others who got more marks.

Moreover the emotional drama which I have to face at home.
Whenever I get some paper with not so good marks,
I start crying because I know the consequences
I would face at home.
Yet you both don't understand
what I am going through everyday.

Thank you to all the
people who changed me.
Not in a positive way
but a negative way.

It is because of all
you people that  I am
no longer stronger like before.
I breakdown in every
small or big things.

I try to control myself
when I am in school
but you people only create
the circumstances for me to breakdown
and later blame me only.

I forgot when I was happy
the last time. I forgot
the older me who used to
remain happy as far as possible.
The credit for all these go
to you all.

Now, I am unable to cherish my life.
I spend not a single day
without crying and thinking  
about ending my life. It is not
that I never tried but it did not work.

I know you all would be happy
when I die. Maybe it is
only then that you all will remember me.
Maybe atleast once you all
will tell that you all loved me
and I would happily believe it
from above whether it is a lie or a truth.

Who is she? Ever wondered anyone?
She is someone who wants
to do many things. She wants to
fly like a bird in the sky
but her parents always pull her down.

She is someone who is always
left alone. She yearns for love and support by her friends and family.
She is insecure about her looks and
it is more difficult for her when her parents only give her certain names.

She is someone who cannot live
upto her parents expectations.
No matter what she does but her
parents are never satisfied. They do not look at her efforts but instead look at her marks and compare her with others.

She is someone who has no one
else in this world except her parents.
She loves them so much but sometimes
they do many things which make her
hate them. It is very difficult for her
to manage all these things alone.

She is someone who always smile
and pretend to be happy though she
is mentally and emotionally exhausted.
Everytime she trusts someone but
at the end, her trust is always broken.
Ever wondered what she felt?

She is someone who needs help
of counselor but cannot tell her parents.
Once she told them but they didn't
pay any heed to her words.
Her parents don't know that she
is a depressed child who needs help.

She is someone who thinks
that she is good for nothing.
She was once very happy but
now as the days pass by she
forgot what it felt to be happy.
She is fed up of this type of life.

Yes, she is me. This is the
actual me. I also want to be
happy like I was before. Before
my parents would pamper me but
now I crave for those pampering.
I wish to become a child again and
lead a life full of joy and happiness
and no sufferings at all.