Once boyish hair lost its flight
In toussling winds
One cricket leg after another
Found its way to an armchair
To hide in cigar smoke.

Brown eyes seem dull in an oak room
No shine on the chandalier, no
Varnish left to scrub
For you are a curious one who
Found more than your fingers could stand up to,
Trembler.

Move with the beckon of the sunlight
Dancing the dance that keeps you free from shadow
But hold your head with anvils
Not as heavy as memory
Or as straw hats, poorly fitting.

I find it hard to know you,
Land owning pity
But it's something like noble
To try.

I forgot when I
Felt success warm my pallet, tickle my spine,
Familiar lover, I
Forgot your touch, and now
Charged with desire for you, you are absent
Like so many flames in winter, or
Hoary kisses on sweltering skin, what contrasts, my prayers
Repeating murmurs I heard lost birds bring
Of far off summers
And tingles on my spine came back
As only the tang of needles
Gritty blood, gritty residue,
Defeat, vengeance, my new Summer and Winter,
Tears my new spring rain,
Despair what was a growing pain
Has now set roots, and I
Forgot success' name

Oh, trade me
In your caravan
With turbanned thoughts in spiced tongues,
Trade me onwards to that land,

The take-away place
The land of shivering darkness
Where silver laces flowers
And mercury runs through veins.

Take me there,
On clouds of cold space
To where silence reigns like kings would dream
Over long nights in winter castles.

Sighs take his pillow
And lashes tickle lover's necks
I can dream like him,
On my silver snowy mountain

Leave me be
To shine down too
And watch you from above,
To warm the sky a little with my blessing.

I feel all kinds of guilty
When I think of those who never got to cry
Those children who weren't so
And know my envy

For in all things I see
Nothing hurts more than
Feeling the child in my mind's womb
Kicking against me

I'm not fond of jealousy
But I think it would be better to know
That you never got to be safe
And you can't miss what you couldn't be

Fear would lose its plea
For it is your mother
And you know it better than pleasure
Each smile is a new land to see

The pulp
Sinks to the bottom
The memories
Float to the top
And the growth
Of the regret
Fills the pile
Of the pulp
The pulp of times forgotten.

When I see her dancing
I feel nothing
Old ladies and sticks
Beat my brow.
How many times
Will I have to see a shiver
To know it's not enough?
How many times
Will I have to see them shy
To realise I want to shrivel
While this thing
Is in me?

Don't dance, but feel something
Because I am poisoned
And feel nothing
Anymore.
Can't you sing?
Can't...
Can't...
Can't you dance?
Then why,
Why should I care,
For the nothing
In you and me
That I love
More than
That tight dress you're wearing?

Why is spread thinly
On my ****-yourself brow.
Just take me,

I never knew anything else.

I knew a woman
Trinket to little pieces
Puzzles making frowns and faces
She lay, lay down blankets and tablespoons
For a man who looked at her
With a quivering, ivory eye

She grew to him,
Shockingly a bud meeting rain
Thirsty for him
Leaving what she thought she was
Behind for a man like him
And she told me
She had no idea what he was
Behind closed garage doors

He bled a little every day, she said
Till there was nothing left
He burned away his wick
And hung, string-like from a beam
Swaying in a wind she never knew she blew
She left herself in his arms

Now she doesn't smile the same
I know, though I met her
Long after
Now she doesn't sleep, but sedates
Now she walks on blades of glass
But so kind
So good
She never fell like he did

I never think I knew her
Like she was
As what she was just cries
But what she built
Talks to me
Lets me know there are people who keep going
Through her smile
She lets me know

You're a trophy,
Bragging rights,
A shot of servility, yet to be drunk
A ship on some waves which I may command
Poseidon inside them,
Yet to be sunk.

I remember you, don't I?
We waltzed a little, stepped on each others' toes
But we don't sound so good now,
I'm confused to hear you speak,
At least, at least I know you
And at least I can chirp to you,
Little tree, Rock solid face, without emojis or discipline
Tell me more about yourself.

What awaits me tonight
What lurk in your mind?
Foully feminine, dusky on broke wings
And sprightly on toes of splintered wood.
Cave in, fall down, and maybe I'll find you again,
But up until now,
I've only heard you selfishly

              and wikl never ztop doin so

I walked to the desert sun
And found my days were not ill spent
For
On its halo words were writ'
A script of firm hand on the fire itself

"I have the strength of iron,
The shine of steel,
I am the flint in the cliffs and the venom on the tongue.
No man shall fear me more than I
No man shall shiver like the cold set in me."

I looked about for the author,
But saw only mischevous stars twinkle
And the pen in my hand.

A tapestry couldn't do life justice.
Life is like staring down a cloud
Until it has bowed its head to earth
And you put your hand to its brow
Cool its fever and
Give it colour.

Then walk within
And paint yourself on the layers of mist
Life is like your own reflection in thousands of droplets of water
Life is like your grunt echoing in a canyon as you try to climb down.
Life is like your smell as the wind takes it away to another.
Painting myself into a cloud,
I wrap myself inside it and
When I am done with whirling its frozen suspension about me
I tuck myself in
And sleep well.

That is life to me.

I find myself
I'm dead in an ink page
Hostage in your photos
I'm sorry, sad I find living up to myself a scary ideal

But really, all I am is the clacking of teeth
And those who don't hesitate to remind me
Aren't nice, aren't my friends really,
'*** friends don't talk philosophy

I'm looking for what I see as me
I'm tired - worn raggish
I'm hopeless and bored
And fickle in the words I write

Ink paint is tinted blood
Water colour is see-through meaning
Mish, mash, mosh
Nice to meet what you see as me

Now I'm free
From wicked thorns
And lives on sticks
Dangling
Like hanging men

And the silence bathes me
The night-eyes keep me clean
And I smile
Under the first warm moon
For many a blue sun

Now lets dream about
The stars
One of the most perfect dreams
On still nights like these
I could be happy

I could be old
And sigh in my sap skin
Like trees with dream roots
And deeper, drinking highs

I could be young
Or ne'er born again
And cry out
For the sake of hearing myself
Feel something newer than me.

I could be free
And tweak like the bird
Air about my brow and
Flowers about my face
Yes, sir, I could be free

Yes, madam, without you
I can be me.

Lance in hand to seek the land
Where he may do some good.
Lost his mind, but fate divined
He'd meet the life he should.

Horse at foot he rides to put
His lance in giant's hearts
But no one's said that they're all dead
They leave him from the start.

It's oft' like this for those dismissed
From societal norms or wishes
We lead them on and watch them don
The spear that's not for fishes.

Perhaps we should try to do good
Like the madman we egg on
For though good books bring laughs and looks
There's a sad tale with each Don.

I suppose I forget what you give me
I suppose I forget what you gave
While the sorrow of lost things is with me
I'll carry your gifts to the grave.

I'm sorry I listen to one word
And suddenly forget the rest,
But believe me, 'I love you.' has been heard,
Believe me, I think you're the best.

Nobody believed me like you did
Even when you made out that you don't
I knew that in you were rapids,
I knew that within you was hope.

So I am myself and your presents
The box 'neath your carrying role
I'll try not to forget that your crescents,
Are just a small part of your whole.

I make her laugh
I suppose
I make her fear death
When her heart flutters.

Wings on beaten brows
Heavy with thump thump thump
And the rocking
Of a pianist
Heavy at his keys
Unlocking you
That laugh that you are in me.

Today, I sorrow
For the smiles I didn't see
For the thumps and piano keys
I made without hoping
Without being there.
You smile from afar,
I still feel it

You laugh from afar
I still flutter
You and me
Make music through open teeth
Laugh
Snort
Thump.

Try to see one man
On the street
While the other
Is warmed by the fire he sets in others

Try to see people
Ignored
Because of where
They are from.

Try to watch as
Your life slips away
Under some minute decision
Of a man miles away

And not do anything.

The state is above us all
And we cannot pretend
That it is "made of oak or iron
Instead of the human spirits who make it."

Don't call politicians evil
Don't call them men of spite
I know some are hollow trees
But the forest remains green

Don't call all of them greedy
When most would sooner
Take death than a bribe
Don't confuse the few for the many

For they are the few
And we are the many
And we are getting in the way
Let's stop.

Let’s make a joke
You and I
About the giddy drinky
About those funny times

You started drowning
And brought up to breath
Where were your children?
Who witnessed that horror?

Let’s chuckle
You lost a little liquid
In your veins
Well so did he
And I saw it

You may have toppled
And built yourself
But his pillars shattered
And I saw

Borrowed senses?
His were gone
Wobbling walking?
He lost his legs
And I saw

What a funny joke
Make it again
And I’ll listen
Because I saw

The quality of a person
Is seen in how they eat
The truth if their nature
Brought out in their jaw.

I hear smacking of lips
Open mouths spitting pulp
And I revile it
For the soul within is evident.

Don't trust those who devour
For they have lost all thought of quality
Don't trust those who defile
For they think only of the sustenance.

If you should meet one
Who takes food slowly and though
Nourishing the body is a craving
Still finds the joy of it then,

You have found someone who finds
The beauty in the daily
The cycle of the living
The poetry of the world

Keep away from those who stuff their mouths,
They think only of their pleasure
Love those who eat well
Goodness is their meal of days.

Sweat beads on well ploughed thoughts
Locked hair sighs gentle as a sopping crown
And we,
We lie together.

Tell truths, tell stories
Of beggars like millionaires
And you and I concurr
With the slapping of skin.

Whilst inky pools of prowling giants
Tread canyons in the world around
And worries scuttle
Along the dust and wooden floorboards, cool to the touch

Whilst fever hands us telescopes
To see the only cooling hand is you
I sweat and turn
To stamp your cheek with my smile.

I may have a nose
Succumbed to the stress of suction
But I can still smell a rat

I may have a mind
Fogged by the forest of forgetfulness,
But I can still remember to be forceful

I may have ears
Ringing with the rigour of revenge
But I can still hear your repentance

Illness is in the body
My mind is unaffected
Let's talk
And tell only truths.

He laughed a little, but
His eyes left
Already forgotten
What I'd said
As I slipped from the room.

Waved, gingering hair, it did,
Likely to miss me on
That busy head.
Surrounded by the thick dark
That feels like swimming.

In truth, I enjoyed our chat,
However short he made it,
But I couldn't forget
Those quivering eyes
And the way they settled
As I left.

It wasn't only me,
Many others try
Miners all the lot of us
But sculptors carve the rock better
And by now

All he is is stone.

My cup of tea is clean
My cup of tea is hot
Frothing and boiling, apt,
My tea and I are much alike.

I have my tea green because
I like to feel like the forest is close
It's sometimes the best way to keep
The hills in my mind.

My cup of tea is tasteful
And always at my side
But it cools too quickly
Luckily, my cup of tea never changes

Even when it's as cold as I feel
It's still just as sweet.

In this place poetry's taboo
It's not like there are rules to say
That writing's bad and poetry's gay
But read some out and see what you
Will get

I use my phone to write
Or my computer when I have it
Footsteps hover, words are writ'
My finger hovers over the light
Of the home button

No one knows I'm unhealthy
My warmth is sponged from alien thought
Mock exposition is a teaching truly taught
As a poet and a writer I'm stealthy
And alone

Or maybe they already know
Maybe they're down there now
Laughing long about him, how
He needs the light of words to grow
Taller

Or maybe they don't place
Poetry and writing as gay
For there are no written rules to say
As no one writes in this dark space
Or at least they think

Could they be proud?
Possibly, but then
They'd have to know first and when
I tell them I'd have to speak aloud
Of all the times I cried as well

There's a glitter in my eyes
When I've caught a kind of sleep,
A star who's come to earth to rise
Each morning from the deep.

And for a celestial second
I won't groan or creak
Old ship will slip through water beckoned;
Bare the world a bidden streak.

I can leave this sandpit
If only for a day
And look at all above the wit
That sleep has granted on my way.

I feel a better person
I feel a better son
For more important things may worsen
Moods of those who slower run.

For now I'll ring my jester bell,
I'll jump and dance and cheer.
I'm happy now for I do well
With all the sleep that's granted, dear.

And morning peach shall find me spent
Exhausted by this rocket jet
But I will smile for days that went
And glitters I have not held yet.

That's not who I am
I'm built of burning wood
And hacked off pieces of granite deemed
Too coarse for cobble stones

That's not who I am
I'm nobody's child
I built myself through a muddled
Community of moth wings

We never tasted sugar, never felt the rosy clothes'
Crushing flesh, blushing chosen lyrics
******* swallows and cheating sucklers
Cold, sunken, green with no choice

That's who I am - my own monster
Stitched from what I liked, stuck with our greasy wick
I blended myself, found my backbone
In the granite sifted and spat away

You can't name me, I get that right
To bore myself in your thick skull
You gave me over to the frost the day I forgot what
Stupid people said I should love

I believe in Déjà Vu
More than I believe in God.
A warning to myself
Of things to come
Seems more likely than anything else.

For after all, whom do we worship but ourselves
When we pray to a deity, aren't they what we want - Power?
When we worship the catwalk, isn't that all we want - Beauty?
When we laugh with someone, isn't that all we want - Goodness?

I ignore the church bells
I listen to the voices in my head
Telling me that
They saw this all coming
So they did.

It doesn't make things easier, but then
What does?
Déjà Vu.

A dream or a wish has no matter of time
Its feeling transponds past reason and rhyme
So foolish to think there's a time and a place
To write all the words that you read in your face.

Though people were made to be perfect
It seems the world oft is jealous, and so
We do what we can with the prospect
That we'll be all we can in a time we don't know.

But I want to leave you with reason to be
A seed in your head that will grow to a tree
You'll never be more than what you are now
Lest you let the world change you, the where and the how.

*We all have a dream and a wish for our life,
But for many that's all it will be.
Most lost their longing in comfortless strife,
But you, you have listened to me.

When grease turns, kettles scale over
Rusted innards show, red in the ground
T, TB, AA, PSA
What can I do?

When you catch the musk of defeat
Bleeding out your crusted dearest
How soon before the years since stutter?
I forgot them already

I can't be what I want to be, without your hateful consent
Tides of cradled love and rotten ****
Wash over me and I
Take it to heart

When it all loses spirit because no whim is trusted
From a signing bearded beast
When you realise it's not going to stop
Until we all fall down the molehills
Fastened and swinging
The only firm hand I ever knew

When it comes back, sweeps your Victorian progress away
Leering, you're not recovering anymore
You get to call yourself it now
You're the addict's child
Slip in that and curdle.

Reproaching, leaning against my attention
Her cupped body, my eyes trickle down her
Luminous hair, jealous dress against her earthenware, earnest skin
Framing what she knows like the book in her hand, her palm
Eagerly charitable, arms
Unconcerned, unlike eyes
Describing tempests I only assume she has
Found within, espoused without, our gorse lining
The blooming of social trials
And her look, glance, flitted worry
Grey eyes not surrendering the reflection
That's not there
Luminous, grotto ragazza
Is what I see, what I see

If I told those
Who knew so little
Of another world
Who knew our tales one thing, it would be

That Thor is real, but he has become something to sell to us
That Jesus is real, but he has become something of a conflict
That wars are real, though to you I'm sure they seem insane.

I don't know you, and you don't know me, humans of the Otherworld
And by the rules of our game that should mean we hate one another.
We live by some standards, but sometimes standards build empires.

I want to tell you,
That some of us don't wield hammers,
But pens.
There are those of us who
Hear about a fight and
Run to break it asunder,
Some of us,
Really are heroes.
I've never met many, but I know they're out there,
Distant humans on a distant planet,
I guess we're both
A little detached from humanity.

The thief sat before the telly
And ate his sandwich of white bread
I told him brown was better,
'My mind can't get healthy.' he said.

'If I allow it to think, it hurts me,
It doesn't like to be woken up,' he joked.
'If I think I know what I am...'
He ate some and choked.

And I watched him do it
And came to his aid
I cleared his windpipe quickly
And he smiled as he laid

'It's good not to let it breathe.'
He tapped at his head
'For thought is more comfortable
When thought is long dead.'

I watched him get up
And take some of my things
He explained as he stole,
'It's sadness life brings.'

'For when I am with you
I can talk like most won't
Society's less pungent
When I've done what most don't.'

He walked to the door
'Who are you?' I said.
'Just another aimless person,
Who was easily lead.'

He turned off the telly
And said to me slow
'Do not wish to travel
Where you cannot go.

We're of a generation
Who's lives have been taken
By dreams that hurt more
When we suddenly awaken.'

'I want to be a princess!'
He mimicked and smiled
'I want to be a rockstar.'
In the voice of a child.

'Me, I am happy,
for at least I know true.
We live in the shadow
Of the things we can't do.'

'Don't dream, my friend
For we are all forsaken.'
He held up my things.
'And our dreams are oft' taken.'

I hiss steam,
My kettle ringing desire
I guess we're
Worth what froths beneath...

Beneath inky depths that stain the skin
My yellow parchment, my dish and dash
Turn me, bury my roots for me
And I'll bear you grateful fruit.

Silence, patience
I can't wait for you to speak
I have to go
And paint a dread poem on my skin

How many moments
Must be spent
Putting a movie ticket over
What you expect of her.

Love actors give you
Love others talk about
White separate from black
I love
For the first, naked time.

But I say nothing
And pray she'll keep
Her treasure for me
Selfish,
Alcohol said.

What... Am I waiting for?
Whom .. Do I want to be?
I
I want to be her poet
Her artist
Oh god
Before I die.

Should I find her
Locked in the arms of others
I will be rotten
Smashed in the glass she made for me
With nothing but love
That dark, beautiful dream
Of passionate action.

Imagine a world.

Imagine a world,
Where we were taught to know each other.

Imagine a world
Where we did not work for money,
Only for the food and the home we hold dear.

Imagine a world
Where the all that we had,
Were gifts from those who love you,
Or from the State who loves you as much.

Imagine a world,
Where we can know that,
Our money goes to help
Those who need money to work.
For other people.

Imagine a world,
Where the news told us every day,
About the one who did the most
For others that week,
For others that year,
For others in their life.

Imagine a world,
Where a smile is payment,
A hug is a coat,
A laugh is a lesson,
A song is a blessing
A call is a welcome
And a painting is always you.

I imagine a world,
Where I can write poetry for you,
Whoever you are,
And every sound
And every couplet
Will rhyme with love,
No value in each other,
But what we can give.

With bodies made like limericks
Five-step beats make joy of pain
And memory makes life again

With groans that beat like drummer-sticks
On hopes that float like tears
I threw away your fears

But never forget,
The way I told you never
And sewed in lace of dew and heather

We left each other alone
We may find each other one day
But for now you can be lost, my way

Don't fill more books, my wondering cherub
Your dance has settled the night sky
I can't fill more poems with why

I feel the cold now, the numb has gone
And walk alone in a still night
I'm beaten, bruiséd from the fight

An empty shell, moved by wind
I'll see you again some day
But for now you can be lost, my way.

If you should see me
Walking by
Hair shorter
Say hello
Say hello

If you should spot me
In a crowded dance
Body thinner, or thicker
Don't wonder,
Don't wonder

If we should fence eyelines
Gait slower,
Don't gut and run
Say hello
Say hello

If you should call me
I'm still here
Adorned in jewels
Ruby sun, sapphire waters
Ask for my emerald green
Emerald green
Ask for me

He smiled,
And the lines on his face were dug anew
About his mouth,
To the girl with lines around her eyes.

She shut them tight
And thought of worlds of sun and stars
Where men flew and birds watched in envy
She was watched by the man with lines on his brow

For he frowned
Head of liquid knowledge hung
Heavily over the page
And the lines of his thought marked deeper

A joke, a dream, a book
All this and more to these different ones
Many more with lines from all their lives of spleandour or squalour
I thought of them and the lines wrote themselves

Deep in thoughtful ink.

It must have been hard
To have waited by the phone for so long that
You forgot what its ring sounded like
You forgot whom you were awaiting
You forgot what it was to have a conversation

You just watched the plastic
And slowly grew older
Unplugging yourself from the wall
And dying with the phone.
Your call of pain and being alone
Nothing like the one you anticipated,
But how would you have known?

You who crawl
Who can still feel fascination of the world
The hard taste of wood and cotton wool
Your mouth smiling for the first time
You're so young, so young

You who gains a thought
And thinks it alone
The candyfloss politics you understand
Your hands clenching into first fists
You're still young, still young

You who heaves
Who can still feel burning passion
That incense of obsession
Taking your mind seeing new things
You're young, you're young

You who lost at last
Who can still feel the pain of betrayal
The rot of blind hopelessnes
Letting your brain seep in chemicals
You're not old, you're not old

You who crackles in the fire
Splits lines like old wood
You who gazes out the window more than when you were young
When your eyes film over and lose talk
You've just grown, only just grown

You who looks at pictures
Who never finds nothing new
Who splits hairs as much as infinitives
Sighing at what hope you used to be
You're no longer young, no longer young

A feeling is gone, A theory remains
And what is to come is less still
What happened before was in hope for the life
That came but lost youth's hazy thrill
Lost

To be alone
A flower without a stem
A cloud without the rain
An eye without the lid
Light in through all to see

To be myself
An ox without a yolk
A wish without a future
A word without a lip to speak it
Flying away from deaf ears

To be lightning
Bright and dangerous in the dark
Ears to hear beyond sound
Mind unfettered by company
Hope uniquely free, uniquely so

Mask left on my dressing table
Chest left in my drawers
No ear at the door,
Oh to be alone