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Bvaishnavi Mar 16
In the broad daylight,
I hide my big dreams,
Protect them from critics,
Further my inside voices,
When I am with you,
I share my little dark thoughts,
For you to say 'It's Okay'
Bringing down my guilt sense,
When I reveal my hidden dreams,
Eyes closed hoping you'll buy them,
My eyes widened,
wonderstruck when you hopped in joy,


Oh my 'You believe them'.
Dec 2023 · 63
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Dec 2023
Overwhelming,
Is it how love is?
I guess it is,
But no one will warn,
If it was happiness or hell,
If love was supposed to feel like this,
Every single moment has become enacting  hell,
To the point where death seems so well,
All the tears that were swallowed,
My heart has reached its absolute swell,
Now that I think,
Am I even being loved?

How does it feel to be loved?
Dec 2023 · 293
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Dec 2023
I don't hate anyone,
But sometimes
I hate everything...
Dec 2023 · 83
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Dec 2023
Why do I want to run away,
As if far away, I would be there with me...
Nov 2023 · 373
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Nov 2023
Wanting to escape,
Has become a disease now,
And I'm so sick,
I'm so sick,
I'm getting sick with every passing moment!!
I want to run,
I want to be cured,
If not I'll not die,
But I'll be rotten for sure...!!!!
Nov 2023 · 86
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Nov 2023
I have so many things I'm grateful for,
One must think thee is fortunate,
But wish I could say I love my life,
A life where,
I sure was important,
But never for once, was a priority,
Where I'm sure loved,
But never a beloved,
I hate how I'm never chosen,
I hate the way my opinion is ignored,
I hate the way I'm not considered,
I hate the way you buy my obvious lies,
I hate the way even I never choose me,
I have the way I never got to choose me,
I hate the way I loved you,
I hate the way you love me,
I hate the way I strive for your appreciation,
I hate the way I never give up,
I hate the way I never get used to,
I hate the way only our washroom walls know me,
I hate the way I get ignored,
I hate it so much to admit,
That I'm the side character of my own story,
I hate the way how I feel,
Long gone girl who dreamed to conquer the world,
Long gone girl who was carefree.
From the pit of my stomach to my burning throat,
For once I wish to be selfish and go vanish
For once I wish to to selfish and die.

I laugh at my own tragic fate,
How I'm aware many will cry,
When I die,
Yet no one values,
While I'm alive.
Nov 2023 · 82
Darkness
Bvaishnavi Nov 2023
It's tragic,
How some things sustained hate,
Without any mercy, without any fault,
Fate for some is Distraught,
And not even bothered to be fought.
Like we appreciate the bright light,
Doing the doable,
And the dark got cursed,
Without any sin,
While the brightest suppressed the visible stars,
Can anything shine brighter when not in the dark?
Nov 2023 · 105
Gosh word power.
Bvaishnavi Nov 2023
Now my words go rattle,
Why "not hurting" yet "being evident" is always a battle?
Nov 2023 · 571
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Nov 2023
The future and past are no big problems,
Than being in the present.
Nov 2023 · 71
Vie.....Vie...
Bvaishnavi Nov 2023
I'm trying, trying and trying,
To ignite the wavering spark,
To fuel the not-burning burning desire,
But I'm trying to light a blaze,
With mere logs turning to haze,
I'm spilling my life into lighter flames,
Amidst the heavy rains and thunder games.
Nov 2023 · 92
Love is in the air
Bvaishnavi Nov 2023
A solo pillow fight,
Waiting for you all night,
Finally, exposing your signs,
skimming through curtain blinds,
Greetings dear golden light.
I dance from the bedroom,
To the faucet  countenance the mirror,
Not a blink of sleep, pondering all night,
Yet I wonder why someone is looking so bright,
I smile at myself, am I being foolish or is it a happy delight,
Trying the same outfit, for nth in the daytime,
I'm yet not sure if I seem all right,
I'm at early the station, unusual
Yet I don't mind,
You have the mightiest effect,
I'm just dying for your sight.
There you are seemingly like a day star,
Donning into freshness, hair so perfect,
Definitely a work of art.
Tapping his feet, a nervous Confident man,
Here I get my Peer,
I'm not the only one miserable here.
Words flowed like fluid, I never had to think twice,
I just keep grinning obviously to let you feel your significance.
And the sky was turning peach,
When we arrived at the beach,
You held my hand and I had to on my life,
My whole body went so numb,
And my hand never felt so alive.
We both were running,
In my mind, I'm already flying,
The beach, the sand, the sky, the sun,
Various views,
Yet I'm bewildered between your charming smile and those ocean eyes.
Blow of cool winds,
Flaming intense gazes,
Giggles, amusement, nervousness and sparkling eyes,
The beautiful curvature of your lips above that little chin,
Above all,
I let the intimacy of our interwind hands win,
Now shall pass another night,
I'll recite our souvenirs, to witnessing Twilight,
Now shall pass another night,
With hearts of contented delight,
While I await another sunlight.
Ps. I'm not in love, just best love stories are always dreamt. At least for me.
Nov 2023 · 76
My versioned Vocab-1
Bvaishnavi Nov 2023
Focus:
When all your inner voices
Cooperate with you to work on one thing.

20 years to learn the meaning,
How many more to exhibit?
Oct 2023 · 109
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Oct 2023
My feelings flowed as my eyes graced the sky,
Finally, I can say goodbye.
The baggage I bagged up, I threw it away.
I'm not sure how I feel.
Oct 2023 · 200
If I was a book.
Bvaishnavi Oct 2023
"Open books are not read
They are not mysterious "

"I choose to be open,
And unread.
I stay normal"
Oct 2023 · 84
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Oct 2023
Made my feet through the gates,
My mighty anxiety awaits,
The doorbell seems effortless,
Yet I still choose to Knock.
The hard surface of wood,
Shoved my knuckles,
Indicating the sealed, I can never unlock.
So much to say,
I wished to let it all,
Maybe that's why when I saw you,
I could say nothing at all.
Oct 2023 · 118
Who.Am.I?
Bvaishnavi Oct 2023
This path is my routine,
Traffic lights glint to green,
I feel plastered to the ground,
In the middle with vehicles moving around,
Blurred vision, numbing mind,
I could still hear the honking behind.
At this moment, at this point,
I don't want to move, I want to realize,
Something which I have wondered for a while,
Not being a daughter,
Nor a sister,
Not a citizen,
Nor a student,
Not a devotee,
Not a friend,
Nor an enemy,
Without any tie,
In this world What am I?
Not the pretend,
Nor the true,
Not the nice, taking the bait,
Not the constant struggle to sustain,
Not the one I want to be,
Not the one the world wants to see,
Behind the sweet smile,
Behind the scars,
Behind the masks,
Buried so deep,
Not the eyes,
Nor the body,
Not the one which everyone sees,
When I face the mirror,
I always wonder I don't know why,
Behind the curtains,
Who am I?
Oct 2023 · 112
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Oct 2023
Mere saath bandha har Rishta,
Andar se thoda toota nikla,
Meri chahat ki har manzil,
Mujse thoda roota nikla,
Kya hai ye zindagi,
Aakhir mai mere sajai hue quaabo ki shehar,
bohath hi Joota nikla.
Oct 2023 · 124
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Oct 2023
Chamak Si andher-on mai,
Nazaraane waali raaz-on mai,
Sabar ke pehnav mai,
Gehraion ke taalash mai.

In the gleam of darkness,
In the obvious enigmas,
In the word of patience,
In the search of depths...
Oct 2023 · 83
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Oct 2023
Feeling nothing
A new feeling
Oct 2023 · 61
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Oct 2023
Be real,
But not so much that you lose yourself,
You don't have to express your every thought and every desire,
You cannot wish for the one who isn't you to appreciate every dream you aspire,
It's not you who's at fault,
The world simply doesn't conspire.
Oct 2023 · 61
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Oct 2023
When you let go of what others think of you,
When you know you are doing right,
When you know you're hurting none,
That is when you start
To let embarrass yourself,
Let you embrace yourself,
Take all the colours,
And paint yourself,
A wonderful and colourful life.
Be Your Own Muse sometimes.
Oct 2023 · 413
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Oct 2023
Someday,
If everything goes well,
And if I'm still alive in my 60's,
I'll leave everything behind
And go into the mountains
I'll write letters to everyone

When you stop receiving them,
Come looking for me.
Oct 2023 · 80
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Oct 2023
I keep repeating the same mistake,
Regret it every time,
It is Opening up.
Oct 2023 · 482
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Oct 2023
What is the correct option?
Which one is more devastating?
Which one takes more healing?
Which one holds the power to change someone's life?
Which one hurts the most?
Physical pain or internal pain.
Can they ever fade away?
The one which everyone carries and yet is non-detectable.
Oct 2023 · 76
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Oct 2023
The moment I saw your silhouette,
Everyone else became a blurry shadow.
Oct 2023 · 215
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Oct 2023
I love flowers,
In the garden.
Oct 2023 · 114
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Oct 2023
Well it either takes
Tremendous courage
Or
Tremendous ignorance.
Oct 2023 · 82
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Oct 2023
Honestly,
I don't know either.
Oct 2023 · 55
#Brooklyn99
Bvaishnavi Oct 2023
I'm half Rosa,
Half Jake,
And a little bit of Terry here and there.
Oct 2023 · 46
Pretend until it isn't.
Bvaishnavi Oct 2023
Maybe the ocean holds back a lot too,
Until it's a tsunami or waves,
The volcanos must suppress a lot too,
Until it's an eruption or nothing,
Maybe the clouds held a lot too,
Until it struck as thunder,
Until it slammed a flood, not the rain,
Maybe the Earth sustains a lot too,
Until it's a quake or triviality,
Maybe the wind isn't fine too,
Until it's a phenomenal hurricane
before acting as a normal
breeze.
My intellect doesn't rationalize my hypothesis,
It isn't an idealistic jester perhaps,
As my heart nonetheless reckons,
We, humans, are even more complex than all,
Altogether are our emotions pumping out,
As a cry, anger, hatred, outburst
What could provoke
As storms, tsunamis, lava, thunder or quakes,
Sometimes outbreak of suppressed emotions,
Or sometimes a mere heartbreak.
Oct 2023 · 211
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Oct 2023
Did you ever wonder?
How many lives exist between being introvert and extrovert.
Oct 2023 · 66
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Oct 2023
The problem is always
With the"nice people",
Who are just nice.
Nothing more,
Nothing less.
Oct 2023 · 444
This is fun.
Bvaishnavi Oct 2023
It has begun,
After an awful eternity of training,
It started,
The excitement of not being affected.
Sep 2023 · 80
Boring- oh yes!!
Bvaishnavi Sep 2023
I define
Boredom as a fantasy,
Boring as an adjective.
I don't understand,
Why it isn't a compliment?
Sep 2023 · 48
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Sep 2023
I don't do drugs,
But I feel high.
I'm not ashamed,
But I feel shy.
I am brave,
But I do cry.
I am no bird,
But I wanna fly,
Touch the sky,
Very high.
But the sky,
Is a lie,
I thought as I lye.
Things I've half done begun to pry,
Before I give up and sigh,
I know I must give it a try.
Before I regret it all and eventually die,
Under the sky,
Which I know is a lie,
I will go and give it a try.
Sep 2023 · 193
Foolish wills
Bvaishnavi Sep 2023
My feelings aren't secular,
In together,
They are mixed colours,
Now me the leader,
Want to separate them,
Before they become weird.
Sep 2023 · 72
At 5.am
Bvaishnavi Sep 2023
Dark blue sky,
Not the swallowing dark,
Beautiful bright yet deep kinda blue,
The one I always used to paint as a kid,
Comforting silence with Chirping birds,
Stars were still there,
Shiny and sparkling,
Cool breezes, empty roads,
Alone and enjoyable,
That is I realised what "Solitude" is.
My kinda drugs.
Sep 2023 · 59
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Sep 2023
And no matter how much you push
Yourself,
Sometimes you'll end up wanting to
Runaway,
Especially when
You have nowhere to go.
Sep 2023 · 148
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Sep 2023
I speak actualities,
So I got muted,

I dare unmute,
I'll witness hell.

I'm not making a big deal,
It is a big deal.

I keep dealing it,
Considering myself mute,

I hope someday,
There are no more options
Than unmute or die.
Sep 2023 · 68
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Sep 2023
I know a little bit of everything,
But nothing seems to be mine,
I'm a little part of everyone,
no one seems to be mine.

But it's fine,
I'm mine.
Sep 2023 · 149
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Sep 2023
Calm down
Take deep breaths

But I'm drowning in the air.
The more I inhale,
The more I suffocate.
Sep 2023 · 222
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Sep 2023
It's alarming,
How most of the Freedom is from within.
Sep 2023 · 84
My faults-1
Bvaishnavi Sep 2023
I never gave myself a chance to explore stuff,
I complain instead of utilising,
It would be a greater sin.
If I think it's over,
I can still begin.
Sep 2023 · 104
Nowhere !!
Bvaishnavi Sep 2023
I'm in the middle of nowhere,
Far away from where I began,
Far Away from where I have presumed to settle,
I run forth and give up,
I run backwards and give up,
I'm between nowhere,
I thought I could go along the clouds,
Somewhere must exist a place,
Where I'm supposed to reach,
But it's not just any empty road,
As much as I wish it was,
The road retains survival and delusional
Qualities at a time,
I'm so into the illusion,
I halted for a while,
Asked the clouds to wait for me,
They waited and waited,
While I took a long nap,
Until thunder-stroking awareness hit me,
Now when I take a look at the clouds,
They don't seem to wait for me,
While I slack off in the wittiness,
Clouds moved out of sight,
I was left behind,
I ran back to home,
But
I'm in the middle of nowhere,
Far away from where I began.
Sep 2023 · 66
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Sep 2023
I've set my thoughts on happiness,
They are so different for me,
Motivation as well,
I don't seek it from the outside anymore,
I went through my Fit app,
It's officially 4 months on and off,
I can see the big lines on my big belly,
Even the slightest flat, is a sight,
I can see my double chin hanging on a little tighter,
Now I will do a thousand steps more,
Now I will happily cut my ties with junkies,
Oh, now I love diets.
I'm amazed,
I cried in the beginning,
Now I'm enjoying the same.
Consistency is a journey,
Of unexpected lopsided turns.
Sep 2023 · 230
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Sep 2023
I want to live and die,
Not hesitate and die.
Aug 2023 · 86
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Aug 2023
My ears are desperate,
Please tell me,
How much you love me,
I don't know, you never say,
Salvation is what I need,
I can not contrast my hunger with despair,
Save me, divulge me.
Aug 2023 · 219
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Aug 2023
Who knew
There's an emotion
Where
Even happiness could ache..
Well,
Now it defines happy tears.
Aug 2023 · 67
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Aug 2023
As splendid as a,
Intense brown Caramel Sunset Beach view,
A realisation could be,
Or as extreme as a tsunami.
Aug 2023 · 63
Untitled
Bvaishnavi Aug 2023
I'm tied,
Tied with the heaviest and strongest ropes,
Ropes of imaginary picture-perfect me,
Imagination is which doesn't exist,
And what I am is how I don't want to exist.
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